Ultimate Paradise

I was testing out my new powered armor, with its fully-functional jetpack, and I still wasn't quite used to the controls and all. So, as I was saying, I was flying around, and I decided to test how well it could pull up out of steep dives. So, I took it up to about 10,000 feet, and then I totally cut the thrust and just let myself plummet. It was extreme, like skydiving, but even more so. So, I got down to around 1,000 feet or so, and decided that it was time to pull out. And I started the pack right back up, and immediately began to slow my descent as best I could. The thing is, though, that I was wearing this suit which specced in at around a ton or so, and it had a lot more momentum that any normal person. And the ground kept getting closer and closer, until I thought for a second that I was going to just hit it and splat, right there, the dumbass in the billion-dollar suit of armor dead because of some damnfool stunt. Well, I'm talking right here right now, so I managed not to spread myself out like a pancake, but in order to do so, I had to swoop really low, so that I almost hit this pedestrian, even. Now, I did a barrel roll in order to avoid him, but I ended up right in front of the corned of this house, and I smashed right on into it and hit a tv on the other side. Unfortunately for whoever's house that was, I didn't just crash into the house, I crashed through it.

So, I ended up making it home, but I needed some booze and painkillers in order to deal with all of my bruises. I only just woke up a little while ago, and sweet damn do I ache.

lol

YOU BASTARD

Do you know that fellow who crashed into CJ?

CJ? I'm afraid I know of nobody by that name.