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Don't credit me for this: This is Shryver's work on GameFAQS. (YOU CAN POST NOW)

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Author Topic: Don't credit me for this: This is Shryver's work on GameFAQS. (YOU CAN POST NOW)  (Read 1989 times)
Flame Spirit
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Gender: Male
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Posts: 618

What's up? I'm back.

« on: 29 January, 2008, 10:00:33 pm »

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ In the mess hall. ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

(Snake and Samus are sitting alone at a table.)

Snake: I thought you were going to wait a few days before you asked that question. (Takes a bit of his sammich.)

Samus: It seemed like a good opportunity. Mario had left, and everyone else was all together. Besides, I still think it's a good idea to not waste time. Who knows what's going to happen next? What if someone else decides to leave? The more brains we have working on this issue, the better. (crunches salad, and talks while chewing) Although, to tell you the truth, I'm glad Young Link interrupted when he did. To be honest, I hadn't given a thought to what we're going to do with Mario. (eats another fork-full) And, as I've probably told you already, I'm not really all that good with leadership. You know, because in every single adventure.... I've been alone.

Snake (puts down sammich): Samus.... you handled yourself very well. I don't think Fox himself could've done better, and he's really the only one who's had a lot of experience with many other people. Believe me (puts a hand on hers).... you were great in there.

(Samus swallows her salad, and looks into his eyes. Snake lingers for a moment, then goes back to eating.)

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ Across the room ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

(Ganondorf and Mewtwo are eating to recover their strength from morning training. Ganondorf chugs a soda, leans back, and belches. Wario applauds him.)

Ganondorf: Heh. That Wario. He's an idiot, but he appreciates a good belch.

Mewtwo: <Feh. He's not nearly bad enough to be considered a villain. In fact, I don't see how he could possibly be a challenge.>

Ganondorf: Yeah? Well, remember when Pikachu, Link, Kirby and Mario were all sparring out in the middle of nowhere? That's when Pit and all them jumped into the scene, and Samus took off her armor. I heard Wario crashed his motorcycle, and when everyone gathered around him, he let one rip that would make me surrender. At least, that's what Link is saying. I don't buy it, myself. I'd just punch him in the face, and send him flying before he knew what hit him.

Mewtwo: <Is it just me, or is everyone here at least a little insane? To even call that an attack. If anything, that's just a mockery of all us real brawlers.>

Ganondorf: Yeah, I don't like him at all. That's why I'm looking forward to beating the holy hell out of him. If nothing else, I hear he's funny as hell when he's drunk. Loses his accent, and everything. (wolfs down a burger, and drinks more soda) Anyway, anything interesting from the meeting we all had?

(Mewtwo hovers a sammich and his soda in front of him)

Mewtwo: <I thought you'd never ask. (bites burger) Right before Doc had to leave, I got an emotion something like what I got out of Peach and Bowser, yesterday. (sips soda) Except, it was more like what I sense when I see someone apologizing. I think he's done something wrong, and wants to confess. (bites burger) The thing is, when his phone rang, he started radiating relief like crazy. (sips soda) I think he really doesn't want to say it, but it's like he's forcing himself to do it. Any idea what he might want to hide?>

Ganondorf: (wolfs down another burger) Hmmmm...... My first guess is that.... he's protecting himself. However, by protecting himself, he might be hurting others, which would explain why he's forcing himself to confess. Is that close enough?

Mewtwo: (crams burger in his mouth) <Sounds about right. I guess that's all we can figure out, for now. (chugs soda) Anyway, I was about to mention Samus, when she was talking, but I think it's being taken care of.>

Ganondorf: How's that? What's up with her?

Mewtwo: <Check it out.>

(Mewtwo gestures at the table where Snake and Samus are sitting, where Snake has just put his hand on Samus' hand.)

Ganondorf: Oh, good lord. Can't these people go two days without falling in love?

Mewtwo: <I think not. There's another feeling in the air, but it's different from the others. That would explain why I can't pinpoint where it's coming from. Oh, well. It'll become obvious, later, I'm sure.>

Ganondorf: That's the other problem with these people. They just don't have a poker-face, you know? I bet if I just stare at any of these people long enough, I can find out all their secrets, just by reading their face.

Mewtwo: <Heh. Don't go looking at others like that. You aren't exactly perfect, yourself.>

Ganondorf: What are you saying? You think I can't hide what I feel? Don't make me have to go Ganon on your ass.

Mewtwo: <Like you could hope to whup me under any conditions. Settle down. I understand. I have my own secrets. The thing that sets me apart is that I've been created to have my emotions constantly under control.>

Ganondorf: Hmph. (wolfs down another burger) Tell me, how is it that you eat so much, but you constantly keep the same weight? I mean, I just have a high metabolism, what's your excuse?

Mewtwo: <You know how I rely mostly on my psychic powers? That energy has to come from somewhere. My body was designed to have a very efficient metabolism, so I am often able to go long stretches without having to fuel up.> (crams burger into mouth)

Ganondorf: Mm-hmm.

(Ganondorf wolfs down yet another burger, and belches again. Wario cheers, then belches louder.)

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ Across the room ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

(MK, Falco, Fox and Geno are sitting together.)

MK: Hey, Geno, how exactly are you involved with Mario?

Fox: Right. I never heard the story. What's up?

Geno: Well... (crunches taco) the short version of the story is this: My spirit possessed a doll because I had to fix the mechanism that grants wishes in the Mushroom Kingdom, the thing that makes all good things possible. I met Mario when looking for one of the major components, I thought he was a good ally to have, and I went along with him.

Falco: Was it just the two of you?

Geno: Oh, no, there were others. (bites taco) The former princess, Toadstool, joined us. She had good healing powers, which helped. Oh, and Bowser was apparently sent flying by an explosion, so he helped us, so he could get his Keep back. There was this other fellow, Mallow. Strange character, who actually ended up being a prince of his own kind. I heard some rumors about Mallow maybe becoming a brawler, but I doubt it'll happen, since I'm already here. (bites taco) That's about it.

MK: Weird. How come none of us ever heard anything about this?

Geno: To be honest, I'm not sure. I'll have to ask Mario, or Bowser, at some point. (finishes taco)

Fox: ..... So, you're a puppet right now?

Geno: (sips soda) That's right. What of it?

Fox: Well....... how come you're eating?

Geno: (pause) ....... You know..... I'm not sure. As far as I can tell, I think my spirit is burning all the food and such I put in, which converts it into energy..... or something like that.

(awkward silence)

Falco: (cough) I hear you have some powerful attacks. As soon as we're done here, you wanna show us? Besides, you want to learn your way around this place as soon as you can, so you don't end up lost, and accidently walk in on Samus when she's ****, and you're forced to hide in a dumpster for the next 12 hours.

(even more awkward silence)

Geno: ........... (eats fries) Sure...

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ Across the room ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

(Pit is staring a hole in the back of Link, who is seated across from Zelda.)

Link: So, anyway, like I said, all I was doing yesterday was making a sweep of the shops in all the regions, so I wouldn't miss anything good. That's why I didn't come in until before that big meeting.

Zelda: Really? What did you find? Anything good?

Link: Well, I decided to replace my old Goron tunic. I was starting to really feel the heat when I went to see the Big Goron at the top of Death Mountain. Oh, Saria says hi. She says that everything's still under control in the Kokiri village area, and Ruto says that Hyrule Lake is especially nice at this time of year. We should visit.

Zelda: Oh.... I suppose I should visit Hyrule, eventually....

Link (raised eyebrow): Is something wrong Zelda? You haven't touched your salad.

Zelda: Oh! Umm..... It's just a little bland. I think maybe the lettuce is a little old, perhaps.

Link: You can complain about that, you know. Say, do you ever get the feeling that you're being watched?

(Link turns around. Pit quickly lowers his face, and shovels linguini into his mouth.)

Link: Hmm. Odd. I wonder what's up with Pit?

(Zelda suddenly coughs and chokes a bit.)

Link: Zelda! You need to be more careful with your food.

(Zelda gulps her bottled water, let's out a big breath, and just smiles at Link.)

Zelda: Yes...

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ Across the room ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

(Mr. Game&Watch is just sitting in a chair, away from all the others.)

G&W: +Wow. I never knew there was so much going on between these people. Ganondorf and Mewtwo are actually gossiping, Snake and Samus are clearly going to hook up... it looks like Pit and Zelda have something between them, judging by the way they're acting around Link. And Marth and Roy... well, who am I to judge? Then again, it's not like there are many females around here. Man, it sucks being able to know all this, and not being able to do anything about it. It looks like I'm one of the few normal ones. And Doc... what's going on with him? Sometimes, I almost regret being 2D. Then again, it's impossible for anyone to read me, so I guess my own secret is safe...+

(Everyone goes on. Eventually, Samus stands up.)

Samus: Attention, everyone! I want to see everyone here back in the Conference Room at 4 o'clock, sharp. We'll continue where we left off, then. That is all.

(Pit and Zelda are together in Zelda's room. Pit is pacing back and forth.)

Pit: Ugh, he lied right to your face! Twice! And he didn't even try that hard. Seriously, even Yoshi would've been able to tell. It's just disgusting!

Zelda: Please, Pit, settle down! He only lies because he thinks it will protect me! He doesn't want to hurt my feelings, that's all.

Pit: If he doesn't want to hurt your feelings, then why does he sleep around, huh? I know, first-hand, that you're all the woman he would ever need!

Zelda: PIT! My lord!

(Pit suddenly stops)

Pit: Oh... oh... I'm sorry. I got carried away, I guess.

Zelda: It's all right, I understand. You don't want to see me get hurt, and that's why you're angry at Link. Please, don't be.

Pit: Zelda, love, I just want you to understand that it's not your fault that he's doing what he's doing. He's probably just some sicko-pervert. You said he was with a Zora, after all.

Zelda: I know, it's not my fault... The reason I don't want you mad at him... well, I want to be on good terms with him. I mean, if something happens between him and me, he might not save Hyrule, the next time something happens to it. He's a great hero, and if he needs to do this to stay happy, then it's worth it.

Pit: (sigh) I guess. All right, I'll try to not hate him as much.

Zelda: Thank you, love.

(Pit and Zelda kiss)

Pit: Although, we really should think of a way to break the news to everyone. After all, Mewtwo might actually decide to take advantage of his knowledge, and make us do something bad.

Zelda: Yeah, I guess you're right. Oh, well, I'm sure it can wait.

Pit: Oh, yes, definitely for later.

(Pit and Zelda proceed to make out.)

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ At the same time ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

(Geno and all the young ones are gathered in the rec room, seated on a series of chairs and couches.)

Ness: No way. I don't believe it. This guy can't understand Pokemon. Only Kirby can!

Kirby: {Yeah, he's right!}

Pikachu: Pika, pikaCHU!

Y. Link: Kirby?

Geno (quickly): Pikachu just said, "I'm telling you, it's true!"


Popo: Kirby.... is he right?

Kirby: ...... {He's right.}

(Shock and awe)

Nana: So, can you do any other neat tricks?

Geno: Well, I do this thing where I turn my hands and arms into guns that shoot small stars.

All: Ooooooh!

Geno: Aaannd..... I do this thing where I turn into a big cannon, and shoot out a giant flash of energy. It's cool because it hits a lot of enemies at once.

(More awe)

Jigglypuff: Jigglypuff, jiggly?

Geno: Game&Watch? I'm sorry, which one is that?

Ness: Oh, he's this really cool 2D guy from a long time ago. He's even older than Mario, but he doesn't age! He's the one that's completely black, and talkss with beeps.

Pichu: Pichu pi!

Geno: You know... I'm not sure if I can understand him. Do you by any chance know where he is, at this moment?

Y. Link: We don't know where he is, right now, but I bet Mewtwo would know. He's psychic!

Ness: Hey, I'm psychic.

Y. Link: Yeah, but can you read minds?

Ness: Oh... right.

Geno: (cough) Um, where would I find Mewtwo?

Popo: Oh, he's probably in one of the training rooms with Ganondorf. You know, they pretend to be evil, and all, but they're really good friends. I think they're just afraid people will find out they're big softies.

Geno: Thank you. If you'll be so kind as to point out the training rooms, I'll be on my way.

Nana: Sure. It's down that hall there, you take the last left, and then the second right. Just follow the sounds of them destroying stuff, from there, and you'll find them.

Geno: Thank you.

(Geno exits the room.)

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ At the same time ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

(Peach is once again pacing back and forth in Bowser's Keep. Bowser is once again sitting in his throne, trying to calm down Peach.)

Bowser: Haven't we been through this before? You being frustrated, me trying to calm you down, and in the end, you admit that I'm right. I'm pretty sure that's how it's going to end.

Peach (stops her pacing and glares at Bowser): Are you done?

Bowser: (sigh) Yes.

Peach (resumes pacing): Good. (sigh) I just can't do it. I can't get up in front of Mario, in front of everyone, give a big speech, and not break down! (deep breath) I have to tell him!

Bowser: WHAT?!

Peach: You heard me! I can't let this go, just like that. To let this charade go on until he dies... I simply cannot do that to him! I have to tell him!

Bowser: Are you insane, woman!? Have you any idea how much damage that could do to him? Do you know what it could do to your reputation? No, I will not allow it!

Peach: Who are you to allow anything? Get out of my way, or I'll get Mario, Luigi, hell, I'll get everyone to beat on you! I will do it!

Bowser: For god's sakes, Peach, slow down! Think about what might happen when you tell him! If you tell him before Brawl, HE will go catatonic, and YOU will just become inconsolable. No, nothing good can come of telling him. Not now.

Peach: Then what can I do? I'm so worried about him! He's been good to me for years, and I've done nothing at all to repay him! I want to do something to ease his pain!

Bowser: Well... I can think of one way....

Peach: What's that?

Bowser: ...... Well.... Nah, that probably wouldn't be a good idea, after all.

Peach: Bowser, out with it. What was your idea?

Bowser: ....... You know that thing you do with your umbrella? He might like that.

Peach: ........ WHAT?!?!

Bowser: Well, I know I do.

Peach: Are you suggesting that I....?

Bowser: Well.... yeah.


Peach: You were right. Not a good idea, at all.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ A little later, elsewhere ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

(Geno is standing just outside the door to a training room. Inside, he can see constant energy blasting, Ganondorf pounding Mewtwo, and Mewtwo throwing Ganondorf with his psychic powers.)

Geno: ....... Maybe I should come back.

(Geno was just starting to walk away, when he runs into Marth and Roy.)

Geno: Oh, hello. You two must be Marth and Roy. I'm pleased to meet you.

Marth: {Geno! How do you do?}

Geno: Oh, that's right, you speak a different language. I'm sorry, I don't understand you.

Roy: (gibberish)

Geno: Odd.

Marth: {What's odd?}

Geno: It seems that you two are speaking different languages... but not really.

Marth: Huh? (Note: that simple sound is universal. That's why I didn't put it in brackets.)

Geno: It's like a garbled version of Japanese, I think. I'm not exactly sure. Does Roy understand what others are saying?

Marth: {I can never tell.}

Geno: Uhh-hhuh..... Why don't you just nod and shake your head, for now?

Marth: (nod)

Geno: Excellent. Now, does he understand what others are saying?

Marth: (shrug)

Geno: I see. (to Roy) Do you understand what I'm saying right now? If you do, please nod your head.

Roy: (confuzzled look)

Geno: (sigh) ........ Do you know if he understands Japanese? Ask him what I just asked him.

Marth (to Roy): {Do you understand what I'm saying right now? If you do, please nod your head.}

Roy: (nod)

Marth: (gasp) {Roy.... you understand me?}

Roy: (nod)

Marth (to Geno): Domo origato! Domo! Domo!

Geno: Now, that I recognize. You're quite welcome. By the way, do you know where Mr. Game&Watch might be? If you do (pulls out pen and paper from beneath his cape) would you please sketch how to get to him?

(Marth takes the pen and paper, scribbles a bit, then hands it back.)

Geno: Domo. You two have fun.

(Marth and Roy walk off in one direction, and Geno walks off to find Game&Watch. Mewtwo and Ganondorf and still beating on each other.)

(Samus and Snake are sitting together in Snake's airship.)

Samus: Why did I say that? I have no idea how to plan a party, or anything. I'm terrible at leading people.

Snake: Come on, now. I told you before, you did great. After all, I'm guessing it was your first time. Why do you keep insisting that your bad with people?

Samus: Because I've never known anyone for all my life. One of my first memories was Ridley killing my parents. After that, with the Chozo, they took care of me, and trained me, but that was it. Even when I was training with my own people, nobody tried to be friends with me. They thought I was some arrogant whiner who only wanted attention. After that... I've been alone... for almost 10 years.

Snake: Ah, geez. That's.... awful.

(Samus glares at Snake.)

Samus: I heard that... what's with the tone? You don't care, do you?

Snake: No, no. I actually kind of know how you feel. Right now, all of my comrades... well, that's all they are. Comrades. Nothing more. Oh, they'll save me if I'm in trouble. I know they'd do that. But the only reason they do it is because they know I'm the person to put out on the front line, and if it isn't me, it's them.

(Snake lights up and takes a long drag.)

Snake: I guess you could say that they're not really comrades. They're just more selfish bastards who care more about their own hides than anything, or anybody else.

Samus: ..... I'm sorry. I didn't know. You know, not many people here know about your background. Maybe that's why you've been so isolated.

Snake: Yeah. Trust issues, and all that. I'm just waiting for someone to come and stab me in the back.

Samus: You know.... they're really not like that. They're all good people. Even the evil characters aren't as bad as they say they are. I could swear I heard Ganondorf laughing, and it was normal, jovial laugh. (pause) They're all happy. They've got each other. It's really something to see.

(Snake lights up another cigarette, and hands it to Samus. She takes a drag, and breathes out the smoke.)

Samus: But... none of them are my friends, either. They like each other, but I always find myself excluded from them, somehow. I guess I'm on my own here, as well.


Snake: You know.... if it helps... (puts a hand on Samus' hand) You can always count on me to have your back. I'll always be your support.

(Samus looks into Snake's eyes. They come together...)

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ At the same time. ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

(Geno is standing outside the portal to the 2D world.)

Geno: I guess this is the place. If Mr. Game&Watch is anywhere, it'd be here.

(Geno takes a deep breath, and steps into the 2D world.)

Geno: Woah.... this is.... different. I wonder if Mr. Game&Watch felt this weird when he first stepped into the 3D realm. It's like I can perceive everything around me, like in 3D... but at the same time, my senses have been minimized. Totally unexpected.

G&W: Yeah, you get used to it.

Geno: Mr. Game&Watch? Is that you? Wait... how come I can understand you?

G&W: Nobody really knows this, but here in the 2D world, I'm pretty much the master of everything. The only other person who knows this is the other Great Old One, Mario.

Geno: What are you talking about? If I can understand you, how come others can't, even when they're inside the 2D realm? I would think they'd have told me that detail..... Wait, why did you call Mario a Great Old One?

G&W: I'm one of the oldest true characters to exist in 2D. A status like that gives me some power. It's true, I don't let others understand me. That's because they're more equipped to handle the 3D realm, so they can't understand me, at all. You're different. Since you're a spirit from a different plain of existence, you can comprehend my speech. Technically, it's on a much simpler level of intellect than everyone else, but, at the same time, you could say that it's on a level far beyond anything they could comprehend.

(Mr. Game&Watch steps close to Geno)

G&W: Listen to me, Geno. There's a reason why I'm allowing you to comprehend my speech. I need help, in the 3D realm, and you're the only one I can get to help me.

Geno: Wait, wait, wait. First, you still haven't answered my question about Mario. Second, why don't you ask him for help, if he's as great as you? And, third, if you're omnipotent in the 2D realm, how come none of the others have said anything about you being omnipotent whenever they fight you here?

G&W: (sigh) More questions? Fine. I suppose if I want your help, I should at least answer you.

(Mr. Game&Watch turns away)

G&W: You asked about Mario? Why I called him a Great Old One? Let me ask you this: Why is Mario able to do things so perfectly, all the time? He's almost as old as I am. Not only that, but he's the first one to truly step into 3D. That also gives him a certain amount of power. While it's not nearly as much as I hold here, in the 2D world, his mind is far more powerful than anything I've ever seen, when he's in the 3D world.

Geno: So, just because Mario is one of the first to come into being, in both 2D and 3D, he has a great amount of power?

G&W: I know. It doesn't seem to make sense, right away. But, if you think about it, isn't it always the first that is the greatest? It's always the "ancient" evils that are the most diabolical, and it's always the "ancient" heroes that are the most just.

(Mr. Game&Watch turns back.)

G&W: If you want to know the truth... he's weaker than he seems. It's only the powers that comes from being a Great Old One that's kept him going for so long, through all his hardships. Except for his status, he is still an ordinary, weak, human.


Geno: Mr. Game&Watch... this is almost too much to take. I'm not entirely sure I can handle all this. Perhaps I should go.

G&W: Not a chance, Geno. You must get a hold of yourself. You asked the questions, so you must hear the answers. That is the way it works.

Geno: Fine, fine. Go on.

G&W: Thank you. I believe your next question was about why I don't just ask him for help? That one's a little easier to answer. You see Geno, what I'm asking you to do can only be done by someone whose mind is able to comprehend more than is normally possible, for a mere human. I would ask Mewtwo, since he's also very powerful, but I'm not entirely sure I can trust him with this matter. It was really sheer luck that you appeared. Also, I was just pondering how to contact you when you came here. This brings me to Mario. Ah, but this is going to take me a while. Please, have a seat.

(Mr. Game&Watch sits down on a chair he created out of thin air. He creates another one behind Geno. Geno also sits.)

G&W: The reason why I can't ask Mario to help me is because this directly involves Mario. If I go right to him, he'll know something is up right away. He's got his heart pretty well set on retiring. I know it doesn't look like it to the others, but I can tell that he's ready to settle down. The reason why I'm asking you is because you're one of his best companions, and he trusts you very much.

Geno: So, wait, how come you're not asking Luigi, his brother? Or Peach, for that matter?

G&W: I'm sorry, but at this point, I can't tell you that, either. Listen, I can only answer your last question, and then we must go.

Geno: What? Why? I came in here at 2:30, and it's only been maybe 20 minutes, tops.

G&W: That's the other thing about a 2D world: Time travels much quicker. We only have a few minutes before we should head out for the meeting. Now, about your question, why I am not so powerful in the 2D fighting stage, the answer is actually very simple: You see, this is a true 2D realm. Here, I have all my powers. However, the 2D world that we use to fight in was created out of 3D technology and machinery. It is not true 2D, so I only have the power I have in the 3D realm.

(Mr. Game&Watch stands up. Geno quickly gets up, as well.)
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