Chapter 7, part 2
[Sasori explains the situation to DK]
DK: #So...you mean...#
Sasori: I'm sorry, DK. It has to be you to take the power away.
DK: #Why!?#
Sasori: It's too hard to explain...you just have to trust me!
DK: #No!!#
[Lucas comes over]
Lucas: Come on, DK. Do you really want him to get us all killed? Have you seen Luigikong? Cads? Squirtle?
[DK hangs his head]
Lucas: I'm sorry, but it has to be done. Trust me, I know...how you feel right now.
[DK sighs. Then he abruptly charges onto the battlefield]
Luigi: Hee-yah! *karate chop*
[Fox and Falco both leap up and do their drill kicks, knocking Diddy to the ground; straight in front of DK with a fully charged punch.]
DK: Grooh...#I'm so sorry, Diddy.#
[DK unleashes his punch, and Diddy goes flying. He tumbles to a stop, unconscious. The coin falls out.]
DK: Groo hoo! Grooh! Groo! #Hey! Look! He's okay! Diddy, can you hear me? Diddy?#
[DK starts to lumber over, but Captain Falcon pushes him back]
CF: Wait, DK! Something's wrong, stay back!
DK: #No! I need to help--#
CF: Stay!!
DK: #NOO!!!#
[CF falcon punches DK behind the wall and takes cover himself. Moments later, Diddy's rocketbarrels explode, consuming him in fire]
DK: GROOH! #NOO! DIDDY!!#
[The fire expands. The Ice Climbers do everything involving ice to stop it, but it only slows down]
Popo: Dang it!! We need water!! Can't...do it on our own!!
[Mudkip suddenly appears]
Popo: ...Oh, crap.
Mudkip: Mud! Kip! Mud! Kip!
[Mudkip uses surf, and with the combined power of the Ice Climbers, the fire stops]
Nana: Good. Now, where'd you come from?
Pokemon Trainer: Good job, Mudkip! Return!
Nana: Oh, answers my question.
Popo: For mine. Why a Mudkip!?!?!
PT: I'm using him until...I get another Squirtle.
Popo: Oh...sorry.
PT: No problem.
[DK's been silent this whole time, apparently in shock]
[Dr. Mario comes onto the scene, and takes Diddy's body away.]
DK: ...
Mario: Not-a another river...
[Hours pass. Mewtwo and Ganondorf are playing badminton]
Ganondorf: *huff* No...fair...YOU CHEATER!
Mewtwo: =Psychic powers are such win.=
Ganondorf: Hmph...hey!
Mewtwo: 18-1.
Ganondorf: Nrgh...Captain Falcon, I need your help.
CF: Show me your moves.
[2 minutes later]
Ganondorf: 18-18.
Mewtwo: =You suck so much.=
[Intercom clicks on]
Mewtwo: =We'll just call it a draw.=
Falcon: Oh, lawl.
Dr. Mario: Hello-a, everyone. Please-a come down to the Grand Hall in 10 minutes. Again. That-a is all.
[Click]
Ganondorf: <_<
Mewtwo: >_>
Falcon: We have time, we're only 3 minutes away.
All 3: Time to vandalize.
Ganon: I'll get the spraypaint.
[10 minutes later]
Mario: Hey, everyone. Thank-a you for coming--Captain, what the heck is that giant blue spot on your hand?
Captain Falcon: Us F-Zero characters...get...odd versions...of...the common cold. Um...achoo?
[Meta Knight gives him the box of tissues]
MK: Forgot I had this. Have fun.
Wolf: I can't let you eat--
Mario: ANYWAY. My Doctor-Dressed self would like-a to give a few announcements before we attempt to make a plan for finding who's-a behind everything that's happened.
Dr. Mario: Thank-a you, me. Now, as he--me...said. I have some announcements regarding-a our injured comrades.
DK: ...*hopes rise*
Dr. Mario: First off, I'd-a like to say that LuigiKong is going to-a make a full recovery. In fact-a...
[LK hobbles in on crutches.]
LK: Yo.
Everyone: LUIGIKONG!!1111/1/1/1!!11/1.1
[Several BPers begin to pounce on him]
LK: Oww!!
Dr. Mario: That's not good for his health, you-a stupid-a morons!
Spat: Oops.
Judg: Sorry.
Ingslayer: <3?
Dr. Mario: Squirtle is also recovering. He should return to the mansion soon-a...I'm afraid he will never brawl again, though.
[Some mixed feelings around PT and his Pokemon]
DK: #And Diddy?#
[Dr. M's face clouds]
Doc: Diddy...Diddy is gone. He died shortly after I brought him in. I'm sorry, DK.
[Silence. Then DK simply walks out of the room and locks himself in his.]
Doc: I hate-a myself.
Mario: It-a had to be said...
