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Sonic Z

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« Reply #75 on: 18 January, 2010, 04:56:21 am »

Wat indeed.
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« Reply #76 on: 22 January, 2010, 09:04:05 am »

Regardless of how hard I try to hide it, half of this stuff is entirely played straight but exaggerated to a high degree, subverted, partly justified, then made fun of once more. In other words, hooray for selective foreshadowing!
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Future Apocalypse Saga: Chapter 60 – The Corruption

Where we last left off, Sonic, Tails, Knuckles and Shadow had come across Lily Locket in an abandoned warehouse, and the Silver that accompanied them was revealed to be a robot. After a few moments, she turned to the side and said, “There would have been an actual commercial break, but sadly we couldn’t fit it into our schedules. We’ll try to make up for that.”

Sonic smiled to himself and nodded. “I always knew Silver was really a robot.”

“The real one isn’t a robot.” Knuckles replied. “And who’s she talking to?” he asked, turning to Sonic. Sonic promptly shrugged.

“So, it’s pretty surprising to see me again, huh?”

“B-but how is that possible?!?” Tails asked, still in shock. “I killed you! Not on purpose, of course…”

“I got better.” Was all Lily said before throwing several bombs, which all four evaded by moving in different directions. As they all charged at her from different angles, she ejected dozens of sharp black spikes which seemed to come from inside her, tearing apart anything they happened to come into contact with, and managed to cut Shadow as all four of them jumped back. They all looked deeply confused while Lily laughed for a few moments. “Pretty weird attack, huh? A lot of crazy stuff has happened to me in the last month, for instance, this.” Her right arm, which seemed perfectly normal, suddenly appeared to be covered by a black silky substance, and underneath her decaying heavily cut skin was clearly visible. “As you can see, I’m not feeling well.”

“So how did you find out about Silver?” Shadow asked.

“Wikipedia, of course. I just needed you guys to go into Eggman’s place and steal some of his stuff to find out if he had any plans recently. I would have done so myself but I didn’t want them knowing I was alive yet, and want to remain in their good graces for now. But enough about me…” The black substance now covered her completely as she grinned. “Let’s get started, shall we?” She immediately launched a large black tentacle from her back, somewhat covered in blood directly at Tails which missed as Sonic grabbed him and ran. The tentacle continued to extend, going through several boxes as it followed them.

Shadow took the opportunity and charged at her. Using her left hand, Lily grabbed several boxes and threw them at him. He leaped across them and threw several chaos spears, which she blocked with her other hand, and at that point Knuckles hit her with an uppercut, but was then quickly impaled and thrown into Shadow as he touched the ground. Close by, Tails took out his laser cannon blasted the large tentacle to pieces, aggravating her.

She leaped up in Sonic and Tails’ direction and threw several black spikes from her fingers which they barely avoided. Sonic spin dashed at her, she hopped over it then flipped over Knuckles and shot another tentacle at Tails, but it was deflected as Shadow kicked it into the air before hitting her with a flying kick, followed by a punch to the face from Knuckles and a spin attack from Sonic, though she managed to whack them out the way before hitting the ground.

She got up and checked her watch before running towards an exit across a pile of boxes. Tails dropped onto another pile close by and chased her, firing rapidly as he did so. She dodged his shots shortly before counterattacking, which he also managed to dodge. He then flew above her as she spun in circles with her extended arms and fired but she blocked it with her right arm just before reaching the exit, laughing maniacally as she left.

Sonic shed a tear as she vanished. “Impaled and died of blood loss by that inhuman girl. We shall avenge you, Knuckles.”

“I’m not dead.” He responded as he got up from a pile of boxes.

Back at the café, Mary Sue and Virus were still discussing important issues. Mary slammed her hand on the table. “Blasphemy! R. Bear was easily the hardest boss in Streets of Rage 2!”

“Oh the contrary, my dear, I think you’re forgetting that Ultimate Warrior fellow, and not to mention Shiva.”

“Shiva was pretty badass, and had good AI, but at least his attack range wasn’t ridiculous like R. Bear. The guy could normally punch you out from three feet away! He’d get you before you could touch him! Also, that wrestler guy was a pushover as long as you make your combos quick and be careful of his uppercut.”

Virus was taken back by her comment. “Surely you jest.”

“I’ve beaten that guy without getting touched. Seriously.” Just then, she noticed a group of girls walking down a road nearby.

Virus looked ahead and nodded. “Ahh, that must be them now.”

A group of five little girls were walking down a straight road, getting the attention of everyone nearby. They wore skirts and t-shirts which matched their particular chosen identities, with a different letter on each t-shirt. They wore thin open sweaters over them, and had different hair colours. One girl with red hair had a red skirt and t-shirt with a ‘T’ on it. A girl with blue hair had a ‘Y’ on her t-shirt, the blond haired girl had a ‘D’ on her shirt, and she was Chinese despite the hair colour. A green haired girl had a ‘K’ on her t-shirt, and the last girl, who was black, had a ‘B’ on her t-shirt. The red haired leader started whistling a somewhat familiar tune as they strolled, while the black girl started singing.

“Move!” She exclaimed began whacking one man out of their path. “Get out the way! Get out the way, fool, get out the way! Move!” One woman shrieked and ran off. “Get out the way! Get out the way, fool, get out the way!”

The blue haired girl looked back and said, “Oh nooooo! I think that guy’s dead!”

The black girl glared at her. “Fool, Imma slap you upside the head!” They stopped singing as they approached Mary and Virus, raised their fists in the air and introduced themselves. “We are the Loli Rangers!” They said in unison. Mary was unsure whether to laugh or not, so she slowly nodded instead.

“I’m Tsundere-chan.” The red haired girl announced.

“I’m Kuudere-chan.” The green haired girl said in a monotone voice.

“I’m Yandere-chan!” The blue haired girl said cheerfully.

The yellow haired girl held up a sign which said, “I’m Dojikko-chan. I don’t speak English, so I’ll be using this often.”

“And I’m Badass-chan.” The black girl finally said.

Mary scratched her forehead, still trying to adjust to the ridiculousness of this. “And you’re here because…?”

“Isn’t it obvious? We’re here to beat you up!” Loli Red exclaimed.

“Is that so? Well I guess I’ve got some time to spare.”

“I’ll leave you ladies alone.” Virus said as he got up. “It was nice getting to know you, Mary.” He said before leaving.

Mary got up and stretched a little before facing the Loli Rangers. “Well seeing how there’s five of you, all of you probably specialize in one particular fighting area, and you each have one specific weakness each. I’ll probably find those out over time, but by then this game will be over anyway.”

“Let’s go, team!” Loli Red exclaimed as they charged at Mary. Mary sped by all five of them, easily evading any attacks they were using as she bypassed them all, and then finally threw a large energy ball as she ran by them all. All five dodged it and moved around trying to find Mary who quickly moved beside Loli Red as the smoke cleared. Mary flipped her skirt, exposing her panties to everyone who happened to be watching and easily embarrassing her while shocking the other rangers as she ran off again.

Loli Green approached her. “Tsundere-chan, aren’t you meant to be wearing red today? And why are you wearing my color?”

Loli Red held her skirt down. “S-shut up! I couldn’t find mine! Just go after her already!” 

Yandere-chan was chasing Mary in a circle as she exclaimed, “I’m gonna get you~, hehehe!”

“Not if I don’t let you~, hahaha!”

She just so happened to see Loli Black approaching and ducked as she attempted to punch Mary, hitting Loli Blue, sending her flying through a shop window. Loli Black apologized by loudly shouting, “Sorry, my bad!”

Mary dodged Loli Yellow’s flying kick, sidestepped her uppercut, flipped over her sliding kick, and then as she spun round to face Mary, she got a boot to the face and hit a café table nearby. Mary yawned as she did so. “Man, you guys are boring.”

“She’s mocking us!” Loli Red said in shock. “No holding back, girls.” They all charged at her again. Mary blocked Loli Black’s punch while also blocking Loli Yellow’s kick, pushed them back slightly and kicked a knife Loli Blue had thrown at her into the air. As she touched the ground, she hit Loli Yellow with a sliding kick, followed by a rising kick as she reached Loli Black and ending with a knee of justice which hit Loli Blue. As Loli Green attempted to punch her, she moved behind her and roundhouse kicked Loli Green into another table. Mary then began blocking all of Loli Red’s hand-to-hand moves before grabbing her by the neck and giving her a chockslam. Just then, Loli Black and Loli Yellow managed to tackle her and pin her to a wall.

“Hurry and hit her, Kuudere-chan!” Loli Black yelled.

Loli Green nodded as she got up and dashed towards her. Although Mary could easily free herself, she decided not to and allow them to get a few hits in. As she got close by, Loli Green’s priority suddenly changed and she instead ran right, leaving the others utterly confused. 

“Kuudere-chan! What on earth are you doing?!?” Loli Red yelled.

Loli Green knelt down under a table and picked up a coin. “I found a nickel.” Loli Red facepalmed at this. Mary, becoming quite bored, threw the two girls over her shoulder, caught a knife thrown at her by Loli Blue and threw it back so the blunt side hit her forehead, she then charged straight through Loli Red who tried to flip her skirt before being taken out. After watching all this, Loli Green put the nickel in her wallet.

Somewhere in the city, Lily was running through the streets, going on a rampage as she threw cars at everything, smashed windows and destroyed most things she came across while also occasionally impaling some people. After a long while of this happening, Rose soon showed up and created an ice shield over some civilians who were about to be hit by a car. She looked over at who was causing the trouble and her eyes widened. “Lily?!? But, I thought you were dead?”

“Just mostly dead. I was just hiding, in a way. Guess I’m back from the dead.”

“But just…what are you?” Rose asked, noticing the black substance around her body.

“That’s simple, Rose.” Lily began. “I am the future…so look forward to an apocalypse.”

“I’ll check my schedule…”   
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« Reply #77 on: 29 January, 2010, 11:35:55 am »

Y’know, I use so many references that sometimes I even accidentally use one without knowing I am, normally referring to a trope or some kind of saying as the title of one chapter. I dare you to find one chapter where I did not use some sort of obscure reference in it…and the first chapter doesn’t count.
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Future Apocalypse Saga: Chapter 61 – From Friend to Foe

Back in the city, Rose and Lily were still standing in the places they were standing. Lily then began speaking. “Hey Rose, remember the fun times we used to have together?”

---

Rose and Lily were in an arcade, playing Street Fighter. “I’m gonna kick your ass, Rose!” Lily exclaimed.

“We’ll see about that.” Rose replied.

“Then I’m gonna bite it! RAWR!” Lily continued.

“That’s…not exactly necessary.”

---

Virus, Rose and Lily were walking through a park in silence when Lily suddenly said, “We make a good team, don’t we? We’re like the three musketeers!”

“More like the two musketeers and the load.” Rose retorted.

“Bite me, Rose.” After a few moments of silence, she continued. “No really, bite me, hard. You want the left cheek or the right?”

---

In the Egg Cruiser, Rose stood outside a room where Eggman was ordering his robots about when Lily approached her. “Hey Rose, I bet I can guess what panties you’re wearing today.”

Rose smiled as she said, “Okay. I’ll give you three guesses. If you get it right, I’ll kill you. If you get it wrong, I’ll kill you. If you stall for too long, I’ll still kill you.

“But that’s no fair! Either way, you’re gonna impale me! Though I wouldn’t mind being impaled down below but I digress! The chances of me getting it right aren’t high anyway! I mean, it’s not like you aren’t wearing any at all…” Rose suddenly formed her right arm into a long sharp icicle, at which point Lily took off.

---

Lily nodded at the random flashbacks which never happened. “Yeah, good times…except that last one, I nearly died then.”

“Those were just the times when you disturbingly made passes at me.” Rose pointed out.

“Still fun though.” During this, Lily tried to catch Rose off-guard as she shot a tentacle at her, though Rose somersaulted out the way, formed a large block of ice and kicked it at her. Lily changed her left arm into a gun and blasted it using a part of the black organism. Rose took this opportunity to sneak up behind her and impale her in the chest with a long icicle. Lily twisted her head to face Rose and said, “This would hurt quite a lot if I weren’t already dead.” Lily extended her right arm and her hand turned into a mouth with jagged teeth which tried to bite Rose as she hopped back across the street.

Lily pulled out the icicle and threw it at a nearby woman; Rose managed to move fast enough to protect her with an ice shield. Lily started firing at the shield while creating black spikes and chucking them at any pedestrians nearby, while Rose continued to protect those close by with more ice shields. “Isn’t multitasking great, Rose? Y’know, your sense of honor to not kill anyone who isn’t involved really pisses me off!” Lily changed her right arm into an axe as she charged at her. “This shapeshifting power if pretty fun, and tearing you apart using it will be even more fun!”

As Lily reached her, Rose turned her shield into a sword and sliced off Lily’s left hand which was the gun and the sword was then deflected by Lily’s axe before she attacked. Rose hopped back from her assault before being hit by a flying kick just as Lily reattached her hand. Suddenly she started singing as she lengthened her claws and jammed them into the ground. “Ya’ll gone make me lose my mind! Up in here, up in here!” Dozens of large spikes popped up out of the ground where Rose stood, impaling her and knocking her through a wall.

Lily sent her left arm through several cars in a line and swung it towards Rose who had returned as she said, “Pass de carnage on de left hand side!” Rose leaped out the way and braced herself for Lily’s next attack. Lily grabbed a large lorry and tossed as she sang, “Indestructible! I won’t let anybody break me down! Indestructible! Nothing’s gonna stop me know!” Rose managed to catch it and stop it before it crashed into a building, at which point Lily blasted it, making it explode. As Rose lay on the ground injured, Lily landed on her stomach and laughed maniacally. “How do you like me now, Rose, huh? You’re a giant douche, you know that? It may be hard to tell but behind that cheerful, savvy, laidback exterior, I can be pretty frail, and even though I wanted to become friends with you, you constantly rejected me and pushed me away!”

“You know my reasons why.” Rose replied.

“Shut up! I’m expressing my feelings here!” Lily said with tears in her eyes. “I thought this would end happily, y’know, Virus dies a gruesome karmic death, Eggman loses, and we become best friends who are also lovers.”

“I think that organism is also corrupting your personality.” Rose responded.

“I’ve always felt this way! Even though for some reason recently I want to invite you round so we can take our clothes off, have wild nookie all night and cuddle in bed all morning, but sadly that will have to remain a fantasy, goodbye Rose.” Lily turned her arm into three sharp daggers and prepared to stab Rose when she was hit and knocked back by a purple blast from Virus who dropped down from above.

“It’s good to see you alive and well, Lily.” Virus said.

“Not exactly alive.” She replied.

“Ahh, of course, and you too, Rose.” He said as she was getting up.

“I see your original plan didn’t succeed, as you haven’t betrayed everyone yet.” Lily smirked. “Anybody willing to trust you is just foolish.”

“I hope you’re not referring to me.” Rose responded. “I’m smarter than you think. I was never loyal to Virus, and was simply looking for the right moment to eliminate him.”

“Your harsh words really hurt me.” Virus replied.

“Virus-sama!” Virus spun round to see the Loli Rangers running towards him. “You guys finished faster than expected, so, how did it go?”

“Uhh, w-well, she beat us pretty easily…” Loli Red said as she looked away.

Virus crossed his arms and nodded. “I see, just as I suspected.”

“What?!? You knew we couldn’t beat her, yet you ordered us to fight her? Virus no baka!” She attempted to kick him into space but hit a bin instead as he effortlessly sidestepped it.

“But wait!” Loli Blue exclaimed. “There’s good news! Kuudere-chan found a nickel!”

“Yes.” Loli Green said in a monotone voice as she held it up.

“Is that so?” Virus patted her on the head. “Good work, Kuudere-chan.” She nodded and said, “Yes.”

“Say what?!?” Loli Red couldn’t believe what she was hearing. “She only found a stupid nickel! She barely helped, and where’s my praise!”

Virus turned to her. “Since you failed, you’ll have to be punished, Tsundere-chan. Using ‘The Stick’.”

Loli Red gasped as she backed up. “Noooo! Not the stick!”

“Rules are rules, and I don’t tolerate failure, and the leader should take responsibility.”

“But this isn’t even fair!”

Loli Yellow turned to Loli Green and held up a sign saying, “Can I has nickel?”

Loli Green ran as she said, “My nickel.” Loli Yellow chased her in the background shortly before tripping as Loli Black and Loli Blue were sharing a pair of large headphones. Virus turned back towards Rose and Lily, then said, “Well, it was nice seeing you two, but I must be leaving now.”

“Is there a good reason why your new followers are five super-powered little girls?” Rose asked.

“No, there is not.” Virus said before creating a large puddle beneath him which he and the Loli Rangers sank into before disappearing.

“I always figured Virus was a lolicon.” Lily nodded. “Explains why he never made any passes at me.”

“No it doesn’t.”

“There you are!” As they looked ahead, they saw Sonic, Tails, Knuckles and Shadow. Sonic pointed at Lily and clenched his fist. “We’re gonna get you back for killing Knuckles!”

“I’m not dead, you moron!” Knuckles shouted at him.

“Take care, Rose, hopefully I’ll see you again in your dreams.” Lily waved goodbye and crept into a sewer nearby just as the others reached her.

Sonic shrugged. “I guess we’ll find her another day, let’s get back to the beach house. You coming, Rose?” She nodded and left with the four of them.

Back at the beach house, Mary had just arrived and was approaching the house as Sally ran out to greet her with open arms. “Mary, you’re back! I missed you!” Mary kicked her out the way as she kept walking. “Let’s get going, guys! Gilmore Girls starts in ten minutes!”

“I’m already having it recorded at home.” Purity said as she stood by the front steps. “So we can stay longer.”

“Oh, thank goodness.” Mary breathed a sigh of relief.

“Geez, oneesama, you’re so mean!” Sally Sue exclaimed as she got up.

At the Egg Cruiser, Virus had met Eggman and explained the circumstances to him. He nodded as he fully understood the situation. “I see, that girl always was pretty mysterious, and quite smart despite how she normally acts. I always expected you to betray me first.”

“As did-Hey, wait a minute, what’s that supposed to mean?” Virus asked.

“Well we both know you’re not the most trustworthy person, and I’ve been betrayed quite often in the past that I expected you to do so when the time came.”

“Do I really look so evil? Honestly, I wasn’t going to betray you, I would just takeover the show with my plan after the hedgehog had beaten you.”

“In other words, you’re just sugar-coating your betrayal.”

“Yes, I guess so.”

Sonic, Tails, Knuckles, Shadow and Rose arrived at the beach house shortly afterwards, and after explaining about the various unusual things that had occurred earlier in the living room, Crystal and Amber decided it was a good time to inform them of their past and the team’s relationship with Virus. Since everyone agreed that a visual memory would be better, Tails just so happened to have a device which could be connected to a television and project memories onto the screen. He was hooking it up to the screen while the others talked.

“It’s about time we got round to hearing about this.” Shadow said.

“Yeah, though in this case it does help to pass the time.” Rouge replied.

Crystal stared at Rose who sat further away. “So, you’re good now, huh?”

“Yes.” She nodded.

“I still don’t trust you. Though I guess it isn’t much of a stretch since Amber is a perverse succubus who believes no always means yes.”

“It usually does in most cases.” Amber said in her defence. She blew a kiss towards Sally Sue, who blushed slightly before looking away.

Sonic sat beside Crystal, who sat next to Amy. “Hey guys.” He said as he sat down. “Oh, and Knuckles is dead.”

“Again?” Crystal and Amy said in unison.

“I’m not dead, damn it!” Knuckles yelled from across the room.

“Hurry and start the major flashback!” Crystal yelled. “Our Great Goddess, Mary Sue, is becoming impatient!”

“Eh? No, I’m perfectly fine, and I’m not really a goddess-”

“Our Goddess is becoming furious! Hurry Tails!” Sonya yelled.

“But I’m not a goddess…” She responded.

“At least you’re not dead.” Knuckles sighed as he walked past her.

Tails had now finished setting it up. “It’s done! Okay! We can finally start!”

Just then, Mads leapt in through the window, followed by Sonny and Shade, who announced they turned up for the script. Crystal sat near the television and had cables from the machine hooked to her fingertips and the machine helmet over her hand. “Just so you guys know, I’m gonna try and remember as much about the past as I can. It’ll probably be around 3 or 4 chapters, so it won’t be very long.” There was a commercial before the machine began working.

---

SA3 and SA4 sat at a kitchen table, eating a bowl of cereal as he SA3 said, “Om nom nom.” He then winced as they finished eating. Suddenly, SA2 showed up. “Hello there, are you tried of nasty old cereal which doesn’t live up to your taste buds?”

“Yeah! We are!” They exclaimed.

He slammed a box of cereal with the Sonic Heroes cover on it. “Then you need to try Sonic Here O’s! With the Super Power of Teamwork! In every bite!” They were amazed at such a cereal. “It’s got little blue hedgehog bits, little yellow fox bits, and red echidna bits, full of vitamin L, vitamin O, and vitamin L again!”

“Ingenious!” SA3 replied.

“Here, have a Bite of Friendship!” SA2 said, sliding two cereal bowls across the table.

SA4 took a bite and started spinning in her chair. “Whoa! My head’s spinning!”

SA3 also felt a little dizzy as he said, “What a wild ride.”

SA appeared out of nowhere to say, “No sweat! Piece of cake!” as he gave them a thumbs up.

SA2 looked back at the screen and held up the box. “Get your well balanced Super Power of Teamwork today with Sonic Here Oooooo’s!”

---

Everyone was in silence as the commercial ended. Sonic eventually broke the silence by saying, “Sonic Here O’s brings back some bad breakfast memories…”
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« Reply #78 on: 05 February, 2010, 11:53:36 am »

*THRILL* as I actually move on with the plot.
*INQUIRE* as I pad it out even more!
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Origin Saga: Chapter 62 – A Tale of Ice, Mist, Technology and Supernatural Elements

Many decades ago, in Heaven, the place was peaceful, and seemed to have the theme of the Hero Chao Garden from Sonic Adventure 2 playing in the background. It had been a few years since Rose had tried to take over heaven, which would have been shown, but the budget was rather limited, much like the prose. We open to a fluffy cloud red house which was quite solid, and was home to Crystal, who left the house in her normal attire to greet the peaceful morning. Suddenly, a giant enemy crab appeared out of nowhere and attacked! The angels were helpless against its giantness!

---

Everyone watching was speaking for a few moments before Tails raised a finger. “Uhh…”

“I’m just kidding.” Crystal quickly interrupted. “I’ll get back to the story now.”

---

As said before, she left the house to admire the pleasant weather and the sound of laughter drowned out by that catchy Chao Garden theme. Just then, her younger sister, Ruby came running towards her from further away, waving as she did so. “Good morning, oneesama!” She stopped beside Crystal, wearing the same robe she was.

“You’ve never called me that before.” Crystal replied.

“Well it says I should in the script.” She said as she took it out. “Let’s go to the park and have a picnic.”

“Okay.” Crystal shrugged. And so they were on their way to the park, walking past clouds, and angels, and more clouds, and Hells Angels, and Charlie’s Angels, also clouds.

---

“Get on with it!” Sally Sue yelled.

“Yeah! Get on with it!” Mary Sue yelled as she joined her.

“Hey! Don’t bring Monty Python into this!” Crystal replied.

---

At the park, they ran through, jumping on people, hitting coin blocks, kicking turtle shells, but staying away from strange coloured mushrooms and Crystal warned Ruby not to eat one. They soon found a peaceful spot to eat from the picnic basket Ruby brought along. Suddenly, a giant enemy crab appeared out of nowhere and attacked! Ruby, being quite startled, failed to evade its attack and was hit for massive damage!

---

“Could you stop doing that?” Sally asked.

“Fine, it’ll be the last joke, I promise.”

---

After the peaceful picnic, they walked back to the house, when Crystal was greeted by a suspiciously familiar ninja with a Sonic Adventure 2 logo on his chest. “Hello Crystal, or should I say, number 34 since the incident with Rose. I remember the days when you were number 42, then Rose killed off a bunch of the higher up angels, and there ya go.”

“Is there an assassination mission designed for me?” She asked.

“Not necessarily. I just thought I should meet you as soon as possible and inform you-” Suddenly, a giant enemy crab appeared out of nowhere and attacked! With a loud roar, its claw went right for SA2!

---

They were all now glaring at Crystal until she finally said, “This isn’t a joke. This part really happened.” They nodded and started watching again.

---

SA2 easily evaded the claw, leaped up and hit the crab with a boot to the head for massive damage, causing it to explode. SA2 turned his attention to the two angels again as Ruby gasped. “Wow! It’s like you’re some almighty entity in a fanfic!”

“Anyway,” SA2 continued. “That giant enemy crab wasn’t a coincidence. Some higher ups believe Hell is sending various monsters to wreak havoc and start a war, which it kinda has already.”

“So what can I do?” Crystal asked.

“Most of the higher up angels are already on the front lines, fighting off the demons in several different locations, one of them being their own domains. You’ll be required to join them, and if you can, try reasoning with one of the stronger demons before resulting to violence, not that it’ll really help…”

Crystal clutched her fist against her chest as she said, “Right! I’ll do my best, ninja I happen to know!” She turned to Ruby. “I’ll be back soon enough, so don’t worry.” She took off towards Hell, post haste.

Meanwhile, on a planet made completely out of ice, Sonny as skating around a clear area, in the form of a large Mexican wrestler made of ice.

---

“Whoa, wait a minute!” Sonic interrupted Crystal’s retelling and turned to Sonny. “That’s you?”

“Yeah, my race can shapeshift, just like that other angel over there. We can look like anything we want, to be honest.”

“Then why do you look like a hedgehog?”

“Well we could wait till it comes up, but I’m gonna go ahead and say I found this mural on earth one day, which had a brightly coloured hedgehog going up against some kind of machine, and I thought it was cool, and the rest is history.”

“So since you chose to use that form as your default one, you’re technically stealing my gimmick while using it.”

“Uhh…”

---

Due to the conversation going on, they missed the part where a giant lizard had stolen Sonny’s ice blade he had recently made, so he followed it by making an ice hoverboard and tailing it. It soon visited a dark planet, somewhat covered in mist as Sonny entered the atmosphere. Suddenly, the giant lizard turned around and revealed it was a giant enemy crab!

---

Mary and Sally Sue quickly removed Crystal from the chair against her will as Shade took her spot. He cleared his throat before speaking. “I’ll try to remember it as clearly as possible.

---

Somewhere nearby, Shade and Virus were blasting rabid dogs which resonated with purple auras. At this time, Virus had black spiky hair, wore a suit and shades as Shade did the same. They were both clearing out a territory controlled by the creatures with guns that fired flaming lasers. As they wiped them out, Virus reloaded and said, “I think I beat you there.”

“You always think that.”

---

“So you and Virus were friends?” Shadow asked.

“Of course.” Shade replied before continuing.

---

The giant lizard happened to speed by, nearby crushing them as it did so. Shade and Virus gave chase just as Sonny passed them on his hoverboard. They caught up to Sonny, as Shade glanced at him and asked, “Who are you?”

“I’m an ice man.” He responded. “What are you guys, mist people?”

“Yes, actually.” Virus confirmed.

“Ahh. Well I need to stop this guy because he stole something of mine.”

“Then I’ll lend you a hand.” Shade replied. They continued to chase the lizard as it turned corners and smashed through buildings throughout the misty city and soon left the planet and flew towards earth while they continued to follow. It eventually arrived in Central City and began wreaking havoc as it fired beams from its mouth and crushed buildings. As it shot one beam at an anime store, Mads appeared in time, wearing his normal outfit with a black hat and cape, and reflected the shot back at the lizard, nearly knocking it off its feet. It shook off the attack, roared and attempted to do so again.

Mads quickly flew into the air towards the monster, evading more beams which it fired Mads, and then threw half a dozen stickers of anime girls which stuck to several areas of his chest as Mads landed 30 feet behind him, took out a remote and pressed it, causing the stickers to explode. The creature emitted an ear-splitting roar as it became engulfed in the explosion. Sonny, Shade and Virus arrived just as Mads took off his hat and said, “That’s what you get for messing with Otaku Universe!”

“Seems someone else already bagged our prey.” Virus said.

“A shame indeed.” Shade nodded.

Meanwhile, in hell, angels and demons were having a massive scale war around the entrance to hell, which consisted of cheap tricks, defying the laws of physics, and surprising opponents with wrestling moves. Crystal flew by the chaos to avoid getting involved and tried to sneak by any regular demons she happened to see. She soon reached an arena-like area, with flashing lights circling the area. There was a throne just farther out, where Amber was sitting with some followers, deciding not to participate in the war. As Crystal entered the arena, Amber noticed her immediately and yelled, “Hey! You there! Who are you?”

Crystal looked in her direction and flew slowly towards throne as she said, “My name is Crystal Clear, and I’m an angel assassin from heaven who goes by the alias, Psychic Angel, because no-one uses it. My measurements are 143-340-690.” She said as she felt her chest, turned to the side, and then spun around. “That’s in mini-millimetres…I think.”

---

“Even back then you still did that?” Sonic asked.

“Yeah, what’s your point?”

“Nothing at all.”

---

Amber quirked an eyebrow at this strange angel, but appreciated the information on her measurements, regardless of the fact she was obviously lying. “So what brings you here, Crystal?”

“Don’t you know? There’s some crazy war going on right now, and it’s pointless, so I want make peace with some of the demons here, so we can all eventually learn to get along in the future.”

“Peace?” Amber grabbed her scythe and got up from her throne. “That word doesn’t exist here!” She yelled as she threw the scythe, covered in fire at her. Crystal hopped back to avoid it, just as Amber dropped down and picked the scythe up again and took a good look at her. “You know, I’m amused that an angel such as yourself would come here just to talk with me, but I’d prefer to talk with my fists. How about this, if you win, I’ll do whatever you want, but if you lose, you’ll stay here and by my loyal servant forever.”

“I accept you offer, but I don’t go down easily.” Crystal said as she got into a fighting stance.

Amber chuckled as she did the same. “I’m going to enjoy having you as a servant very much. That body of yours will surely be well worth the wait, oh yes…” Amber said, licking her lips.

---

“Hey! I never said anything dirty like that!” Amber yelled. “And how do you ever know? You weren’t even there!”

Shade shrugged. “Just sounds like something you’d say.”

“It feels like you guys are just making this up as you go along.” Knuckles said to no-one in particular.

“Yeah, I guess you could say that.”

“Hold on, guys.” Tails began, “I need to go check something so we’ll continue this in a few minutes.” He then left the room.
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« Reply #79 on: 12 February, 2010, 12:38:21 pm »

When I’m not writing this in my spare time, I do MSTings on other fanfiction which takes itself too seriously and fails as a result…or do I?
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Origin Saga: Chapter 63 – Battlefield Hell

Tails had come back into the living room, where Purity Sue was currently offering freshly baked cookies to everyone. She approached him as he entered the room. “Would you like a cookie, Tails?”

“Oh, thank you.” He said as he took it and then took a bite. “Is there a special ingredient?”

“Just a few pinches of cinnamon, some sugar coated sugar, a bit of fish…”

As she went on, with Tails nodding as he listened intensively, Crystal and Amy were watching. “I support Tails and Purity as a couple.” Crystal finally said.

“I’m coming up with a plot for the fanfic as we speak.” Amy replied, writing down ideas on a piece of paper.

---

Where we last left off, there was about to be angel on demon action, and the location was hot, because it was hell. Crystal charged at her and unleashed a series of punches and kicks which Amber blocked. Amber saw an opening and tried to punch her, but Crystal ducked as she did so and hit her with a rising kick before flipping back. Amber quickly recovered and threw several large waves of fire at her, which Crystal flipped and slid under. Crystal threw her spear at Amber which she whacked out the way before charging straight through Crystal, and then stopped and summoned a giant flow of fire from underground that Crystal barely avoided.

Amber created a giant ball of fire and fired it at her, and due to the size of the ball, Crystal jumped out the way instead of trying to knock it back, and lost sight of Amber as she did so. Amber managed to get behind her and fired a smaller ball of fire, knocking Crystal into part of the arena. Crystal quickly flew out from the rubble towards her again, and they exchanged punches as they flew into the air until Crystal missed one attack and was tackled into part of the arena again. Crystal charged at her yet again and attempted to punch her but missed as Amber ducked. Crystal sidestepped Amber’s uppercut, grabbed her spear and unleashed a series of repeated swings and slashes until finally stabbing her in the stomach and dragging her to the ground, creating a large crater in the process.

Crystal climbed out from the crater and took a few deep breathes, when from within the smoke Amber got up and prepared to attack her again. She fired a beam of fire which Crystal barely avoided as she jumped out the way. “You’re still up?” Crystal asked in disbelief.

“Well I’m not a demon lord for nothing.” She shrugged. “If I’m not mistaken, you seem a bit tired yourself. It’s only a matter of time before you give up, or become unconscious, and then I’ll be free to do what I want with your body, and we’re gonna be quite busy tonight.

---

“I feel that I have the right to tell this part.” Amber said. “Because Shade is trying to make me look like a sick perverted demon.”

“You are a sick perverted demon.” Crystal retorted.

“But I’m not that bad.”

“You always suggest you can ‘cure’ any illness, and still make passes at me to this day.”

“It’s just all in good fun.”

“The first time you met my sister, you wanted to kidnap her and do all sorts of sick things because you said her innocence would be eternally pleasurable to corrupt and the look on her face while she’s trying to resist those pleasures would be even more satisfying.”

“Dude.” Mads shook his head in disgust at her.

“It was a joke!” Amber exclaimed.

“Some jokes shouldn’t be made.”

“Could we skip ahead, please?” Knuckles asked.

“Yeah, sure.” Shade replied.

---

Back in the arena, her followers watched as Amber fired a wave of fire shaped like a dragon at Crystal who blocked it with a psychic shield. Amber then crouched and launched herself into the air where she flipped and landed on a meteor which happened to be passing by. She crossed her arms, and covered herself along with the meteor in a layer of fire while her cape bellowed in the wind approaching the arena. Crystal took cover by the stands as the meteor crashed in the middle of the arena.

---

“That looked really cool.” Sally Sue said. “I gotta learn how to do that.”

“To be honest, the meteor just happened to be in the area at the time.” Amber replied. “But I can teach how to do several other things…” Amber spoke softly as she glazed upon her and was only inches away from her.

Sally blushed and turned to the side. “B-but we mustn’t, I only have eyes for Mary…”

“Say what.” Mary responded, seeming annoyed by her comment.

Amber moved in closer. “Do not fight your feelings, Sally, give in to your sensations and you will forever be satisfied.”

“O-okay.” She blushed profusely as she turned back to Amber.

“Get a room, you two!” Sonya yelled.

“I think there’s a room upstairs where the walls aren’t so thin.” Amber said as she and Sally left.

“I was kidding, you know…” Sonya replied, but sadly they had left.

---

After another ten minutes of fighting, Crystal and Amber were now both quite tired and almost completely naked as their clothes had been badly damaged during the fight, and Crystal was the first to speak. “This fighting is pointless, you know. Seeing that you’re a demon lord, other demons are likely to follow your example, are they not?”

“Well I admit you’re better than I thought you’d be, but talking things out just isn’t my style.”

“It doesn’t have to be, but just for this one occasion.”

“I’ll try to get the other demons to stop the fighting on one occasion.”

“And what’s that?”

“You know what I want…” Amber grinned as she slowly embraced Crystal and moved a hand down towards her-

---

“Hey! That never happened!” Crystal suddenly shouted.

“It didn’t? Sorry, my misake.” Shade went back slightly.

---

“I’ll try to get the other demons to stop the fighting on one occasion.”

“And what’s that?”

“You promise to fight me again.”

“Deal.” Crystal smiled as they both shook hands, and then hugged, while Amber’s followers who were still watching took pictures of the almost naked girls.

---

Crystal got to her feet. “And so that was how me and Amber became friends. She still kept trying to seduce me, grope me at every opportunity, try to do weird things when I’m sleeping, and in general being a creepy person to hang around with, but I got used to it. Upon seeing our way of friendship, some angels and demons decided that since others were doing it, they could also become friends, and those who were already quite close, didn’t need to hide it any longer.”

“That seems awfully convenient.” Tails commented.

“It does, doesn’t it?”

“We still haven’t heard where exactly you came from yet.” Sonic said as he turned Mads.

“Ahh, well at one point I was a badass normal using gadgets and such to beat down random monster attacks, until I was once brutally attacked by this robot bear who nearly killed me, so a bunch of scientists replaced some of the large chunks of flesh taken by the bear with robot parts to prevent dying of blood loss.”

Tails got to his feet. “If my analysis is correct, that wouldn’t work be-”

“Well it did work, so there! It made me better than I was, stronger, faster, more of a chivalrous pervert. Like the six billion dollar man, but a little cheaper.”

Meanwhile, in an average looking house on an average street, Virus and the Loli Rangers were currently staying there. Virus and Loli Red were standing by a table on one side of the room while Loli Blue, Green, and Yellow were sitting on a red couch watching the television. Loli Black soon walked in with a boombox and set it down on the floor before pressing a button. The song, “Get It On the Floor suddenly started. “Let’s get it oooon!” She said as she put on a pair of shades. Loli Blue got behind her, followed by Green and Yellow and they formed a Congo line as they head banged to the beat while Loli Yellow wrote out the words while doing so but crossed out the swear words.

Loli Red sighed as she watched them. “So Virus, you still haven’t told us much about yourself. Why do you look like some somewhat cute yet obviously evil purple humanoid mist thingy?”

“That’s an unusual way to describe me, and do I really look so evil? Here I thought I blended in really well with mysteriously good…”

“So are you going to tell me or not?”

“Fine, I feel like some greater almighty force will make me do so eventually anyway…”
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« Reply #80 on: 19 February, 2010, 12:26:19 pm »

Regardless of how much filler I may add, I assure you this won’t go over chapter 80. That depends what you may consider filler, anyway.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Origin Saga: Chapter 64 – The Virus

Virus sat on a table ahead of the five Loli Rangers, preparing to tell them a story. “As you probably know, I wasn’t always like this. This demonic looking evil appearance wasn’t always natural. So, you wanna know how I came to be?”

“Uh, yeah. I asked just a minute ago.” Loli Red replied.

“Very well. You wouldn’t know this, but I used to be quite good friends with a person called Shade, who came from the same planet. One day, some sort of cannibalistic virus was spread across our planet due to a certain experiment in a lab causing an unstable chemical reaction. This either wiped out those infected by the virus, or caused them to mutate into horrific creatures with resonating purple auras, that killed and devoured any beings not of their own kind. At that point, it was like one of those post-apocalyptic shows where you gotta do what you can to survive and me and Shade fortunately had good enough skills to fight off a majority of the infected beasts.”

Loli Blue raised her hand, at which point Virus stopped and turned to her. “Yes, Yandere-chan?”

“Umm, where are the jokes?” She inquired.

“Inquiring minds want to know.” Kuudere-chan added.

Virus shook his head. “There are no jokes. I’m not going to keep stopping every once in a while to tell a quick joke. For those only listening to wait for the inevitable jokes, they aren’t coming so it would be in your best interest to leave immediately.” The other four rangers besides Loli Red left, which Virus and Tsundere-chan both sighed at.

“I guess I’ll continue now.” Virus said before doing so. “One day, we managed to track down the host of the virus infecting most of the planet. This came soon after we formed a team after meeting an angel and a demon, Crystal and Amber respectively one day when one of those infected creatures attacked earth. After a long fight, we did manage to kill the giant spider which seemed to spread it, but I was killed along with it when I tackled it into a hole in the ground. I think I was dead for about two weeks, before the virus completely started to reconstruct my molecular DNA and gave me a burning purple aura. I was able to use various powers I can now currently use, and after meeting up again with the others, I used these for good.”

The other four rangers came back and took their seats again, while Loli Yellow held up a sign saying, “We decided the jokes aren’t really that big a deal. We’ll still listen, please continue.”

Virus nodded. “Very well. Things were going quite fine for a long while, we still fought crime together, and hung out often, but eventually, that power which I relied on would slowly begin to poison my body. Very slowly, I began to change. The virus was starting to burn away my original somewhat misty appearance, bringing me immense pain as it took place. I tried to cover it up with leather gloves and other such accessories, but it was only a matter of time before they would begin to notice.”

Loli Black raised her hand. “Couldn’t you show this on a screen or something?”

“I’m no a scientific genius. Just use your imagination.” Virus continued his story. “So anyway, since me and Shade had killed the original host, the virus needed a new body to thrill from. I was the only organic lifeform around at the time, but as I used my powers more and became stronger, so did the virus, at such a rapid rate that I was actually becoming the virus. This affected my rational decisions while the change was slowly taking place, and was around the time we stopped Pedobear’s universal organisation of crime and put him behind bars, making us legendary heroes to all little girls out there.”

The Loli Rangers shed tears as they heard this. Loli Red then said, “I would hug you if I wasn’t a tsundere.”

“Yes, I know, you gotta stick to your character type. So, I figured at the time that since there was so much crime going on, if most people were to become underlings of mine, there would no longer be any need for violence. I wasn’t looking to rule over the earth, but to simply purify the planet and eliminate those who did more bad than good.”

“That sounds like a negative action in my opinion.” Loli Green commented.

“It does, doesn’t it?” Loli Red agreed.

“A negative action? You mean creating something like a negaverse?” Loli Blue asked.

Loli Yellow held up a sign saying, “A negaverse sounds bad.”

“The word nega can sound bad; it’s not always that way.” Loli Black replied. “For example, a bad guy can probably be a good person in a negaverse, seeing how it’s like an opposite universe.”

“Nega please!” Loli Blue responded. “That’s ridiculous; things aren’t always the opposite of each other just because it’s another universe.”

Loli Black narrowed her eyes at Yandere-chan. “You brought up the idea of a negaverse just so you could say that one line, didn’t you?”

Loli Blue giggled upon her finding out. “Sorry, I couldn’t pass up the opportunity.”

Virus coughed loud enough to get their attention again. “Could I please continue?”

“Yes please.” Loli Red nodded.

“But of course, my friends didn’t exactly agree with my methods, so I tried to get my followers to take care of them, but they weren’t exactly helpful in achieving that purpose. The fight eventually led to the ancient ruins of a temple I had found somewhere in Adabat, where our final confrontation took place…”

Back at the beach house, everyone was back in the living room, watching the projector, which seemed to be showing a music video.

---



Knight of the Wind played as it showed a simple medieval street. After a few moments, Sonic ran down the street, carrying a sword and soon leapt onto a rail, which tilted up as common civilians pointed and cried out, “Whooooooaaaaa!” It then curved right leading to a spring on a building. Sonic hit it and flew diagonally to another, then soared into the sky as the sunlight shun upon him. He landed on a street in front of a group of people as he said, “Hey ya’ll.” He then looked ahead and saw a raging storm and a war happening ahead. “I know, you have waited much too long. I will be your shining star. I’m here, to conquer here and far!”

He firmly gripped his sword before charging ahead and slashed at one dark knight as he sped past, shown from three different angles. Sonic hopped towards the next knight and sliced his helmet off, shown from three angles as he pasted by. Further down the street were people running ahead trying to take cover from the flaming wreckage being thrown using catapults. He moved throughout the area, grabbing them before they were hit as he moved by and dropped them by a building before leaping ahead and attacking a knight with a rapid spinning slash. He jumped onto a spring leading to his castle, and then quickly slashed through several knights blocking his path till he reached a dining room with Tails, Amy, Knuckles, Shadow and Blaze sitting at certain spots, while Sonic sat ahead of them.

He stood ahead of them as the screen panned out; he then wiped out a pair of black shades and said, “I’m the kniiiiiiight…” He promptly put them on, “Of the wind!” Suddenly, the background exploded due to huge amounts of awesome. It then showed scenes of stuff getting blown up due to the war outside soon before Sonic landed beside some soldiers as he said, “Hey ya’ll. Welcome to the end is near.” He quickly took them out as he walked ahead of them. “I know, I will bring you pain and fear!” He dashed through three soldiers immediately as he said, “On the ground!” He then leaped high as he said, “To the sky!” He sliced at three dragons which were nearby before landing. “In a flash! I’m gone!” As he finished, he zigzagged across the land within seconds and grabbed the enemy’s crown as he leaped over him. He then grabbed several civilians nearby and ran through three enemy gates.

He raised his sword into the air as more knights appeared, causing it to glow as the sun reflected of it. He then dashed through them at the speed of sound, knocking them out as he did so. He soon reached a hill where he stopped and looked ahead, being able to see his kingdom further ahead. He put on his black shades, his red cape, and then slowly walked down the cliff towards the castle. He ran by various spots on the way there, such as misty lake soon before passing SA, SA2, SA3 and SA4 who were playing the song, at which point SA2 had a guitar solo and a castle nearby exploded as he finished.

Sonic put on his Excalibur armor as he slowly walked down a knight invested street. He quickly charged through one knight, shown in three angles, and then took out half a dozen civilians being held hostage before going through a conveniently nearby loop and spin dashing through three more. He quickly moved along, mowing down any other knights which got in his way, then finally leaped towards the balcony as he got to his castle. Upon landing safely, he put his sword away and walked in as the song ended.

---

“That was a great day.” Sonic nodded, remembering when they did that.

“It had good lighting, camera angles, and the explosions were a nice touch.” Sonya nodded in approval. “Excellent work, Tails. You never seem to amaze me.”

“Thank you for the positive feedback, Sonya.” Tails replied. “I had a lot of fun myself filming it. We should really get back to the flashback thing though, shouldn’t we?”

“Right.” Sonny nodded. He then got into the chair. “I’ll finish this part if no-one minds.” (I’ve been looking for the right moment to actually use that for a while, and since this chapter was kinda short without it, I figured now would be a good time)
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« Reply #81 on: 26 February, 2010, 12:30:54 pm »

So this guy walks into a bar, when suddenly Godzilla attacked. Now, most people were screaming and wetting themselves, but not this guy. When things got real, he put on his kewl face, then everything was kewl. Godzilla recognized the face, and then shades suddenly materialized onto his face as he also put on his kewl face, and left, quite pleased. The moral of the story? Never leave home without your kewl face. Just Don’t. It makes everything kewl.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Origin Saga: Chapter 65 – Showdown at the Ancient Temple

Before Sonny began, he said, “Just to clarify a few things, before I go on, this place turned out to be home to a sacred tome, which was actually behind us turning into statues and imprisoning Virus in four basic torches. We weren’t conscious when this happened, as that would have been horrible to be stuck like that for decades, incapable of moving at all. Okay, now that I got through that…”

---

Sonny, Shade, Crystal, Amber and Mads all arrived at the entrance to the temple and cautiously entered. While walking down the eerily quiet stone paths with patterns on the walls, being lit up by torches nearby, they encountered various murals, one of them being Godzilla and Charles Barkley having a basketball game. Virus simply stood a little ahead, waiting for them, and as they approached him, he motioned towards the right wall, at a mural showing himself as a massive muscular beast with only a ghostly tail, and a spiky forehead destroying a city with a river completely evaporated in the background. “Marvel upon this piece of art. Is it not awe-inspiring? I created it myself.”

---

“Whoa, wait a minute.” Sonic interrupted. “Virus did that one himself? Unlike the other ones, that mural wasn’t some kind of future prophecy which an oracle came up with?”

“That’s what he told us.” Sonny shrugged.

---

Virus took off further down the path as the others gave chase. When they reached an intersection containing three different paths, Virus summoned a portal on the side of one path and flew through it, vanishing from their sights. Sonny and Amber took the left route, Shade and Crystal went down the right route, and Mads went on along down the middle. After fighting through a room of mummies, all that Sonny and Amber managed to find was a dead end. On the right side, Shade and Crystal entered a large, brightly lit room, with a small flight of stairs leading up to a simple pillar of light where Virus stood as they arrived. “Hello, friends, I’m glad to see you here, yet also saddened with how things had to turn out.”

“Same here, though we’ve had our differences seeing eye to eye, I’d hate to have to kill you, but in this instance, I don’t seem to have much of a choice.” Shade replied.

Crystal nodded. “You may be different now, but you can’t beat us both at once.”

Virus frowned at her. “I think you’re quite mistaken, my dear. I am vastly different now, far more than you’d know. The difference between us is that I am a hive mind; I can create endless copies of myself, connected to each other spiritually, so any organic energy they drain also allows me to exploit its power. Unless you’ve forgotten, I recently infected a majority of the humans, and I can already feel a massive amount of power available to me right now. Your chance of victory is small, as you’ll soon see.”

Shade sighed. “I’m tired of your run-on explanations.” And with that, he charged at Virus and tried to punch him, which Virus dodged before kneeing him in the chest then hit him in the back of the neck with a karate chop. Virus effortlessly dodged several attacks from Crystal who quickly joined in, and he waited until she did a sweep kick before leaping up and roundhouse kicking her across the face. He summoned a portal containing several dozen small spikes which impaled Crystal but before he could make another move, Shade fly kicked him.

Meanwhile, Mads had discovered a black book upon a pedestal, and in gold were the words written, “The Godly Book.” Upon taking the book, the place began to rumble and a giant boulder suddenly appeared ahead. Mads ran back towards the intersection as he carried the book, evading poison darts shot from the walls, blasting giant spiders, and then leaping across a spiked pit which the boulder fell into.

Back in the large room, Shade hit Virus with an elbow to the face, knocking him back. Crystal knocked him back with a kick, and then as they planned to attack together, Virus created a portal underneath his feet and sank into it, dodging their attacks. Virus appeared behind Shade and punched him into a wall, and then elbowed Crystal in the chest as she turned around, and then blasted her into a wall.

---

“Uhh, Sonny, Virus wasn’t that strong.” Crystal informed him. “I mean, sure, he was stronger than we figured at the time, but he was still beatable.”

“Well it makes it more suspenseful this way.”

“Actually, it just makes this a little more cliché.” Shade replied.

“Whatever.”

---

After quickly recovering, Sonny and Amber arrived, making it fairly even when Virus started fighting at full power. During this fight, Mads showed up, still carrying The Godly Book. He opened it, trying to look for the right incantation to read out stop Virus for good.

---

The projector had stopped, and there was a long period of silence before Amy eventually asked,” So what happened after that?”

Sonny shrugged. “I don’t know, I can’t recall much after that. Do any of you guys know?” He asked, glancing over at the other four.

The other three shook their heads while Mads spoke up. “I vaguely remember saying one thing to do with imprisoning anyone in the immediate area, and would undo the effect upon saying the colour of their eyes out loud. I think this also removed Virus’ infection when this happened, causing some partial memory loss as well.”

“Then why wasn’t Virus released around the same time you guys were?” Tails asked.

“We don’t know, and it’s not important enough to need a good answer. So anyway, we’re pretty much done here.” Mads said, getting up.

Sonny hopped out of the chair. “Yeah, we should really get going.” The five of them waved goodbye to the others as they left, while they waved back. Rose left quickly afterwards with such silence that the others didn’t notice.

Tails stroked his chin as he thought about the book. “That godly book must have been enchanted by an incredibly powerful magician.”

Mary Sue nodded. “Yup, he sure was. I knew the guy who wrote the book, personally at one point and helped him write it.”

“I didn’t know you liked to brag.”

Mary suddenly shouted, “I’m not bragging! This really happened!” She calmed herself down quickly afterwards. “This is why I don’t talk about myself often…”

“Well it’s not like you were the one who created bread.”

“Actually, I did create bread, but allowed my friend to take credit for it. Boy, what a dumb idea that was…”

“Well I doubt there are any more absurd things you’ve done in the past.”

“Actually, there’s also the fact that holy water comes from my sweat when I go jogging. Sally once collected the sweat from all over my body, which had a side effect of burning evil beings, so they decided to call it holy water.” Sally Sue smiled and recalled the time as Mary mentioned this.

Knuckles narrowed his eyes at her. “You’re making this up, aren’t you?”

Mary chuckled for a few seconds. “Yeah, though I guess it would be somewhat hard to notice.” Mary got to her feet. “Anyway, we should also get going, I still need to watch Gilmore Girls.”

Sally waved goodbye. “Even though I still don’t like you guys much, I still had a good time.”

“Have a pleasant day, everyone.” Purity added.

“And another thing,” Sally began. “Why does almost everyone usually use my full name when referring to me?”

“We’re just used to it, I guess.” Sonic replied.

Sally simply accepted it and the three of them left. There was a rectangular pack of squirrels outside, which they all gently sat on. The squirrels raised themselves off the ground like a magic carpet and flew off into the sunset. Everyone stared in disbelief for several moments until Sonya said, “You guys saw that too, right?”

“Let’s pretend we didn’t.” Shadow responded.

Back at Virus’ place, he had also finished telling the Loli Rangers about the various things he could recall happening. “So that’s about it, any questions?” Loli Blue immediately raised her hand. “Yes, Yandere-chan?”

“It needed more jokes.” She said with a frown.

“I agree.” Loli Green nodded.

“C’mon, guys!” Loli Red began. “At least he bothered to try and tell us, instead of not bringing it up at all. You can’t take it seriously if there are too many jokes, so just a small amount would have done the job.”

Virus nodded, while still confused by her response. “Thank you, Tsundere-chan…I think.”

“I-It’s not like I was sticking up for you because I like you or anything…baka.”

Meanwhile, Lily sat on top of a hill in an unknown location, staring off into the sky as she sat with her legs crossed and sighed. “I need more screen time…”
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« Reply #82 on: 05 March, 2010, 06:44:34 am »

There’s no chapter this week, mainly due to writer’s block. I’ll update again next Friday.
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« Reply #83 on: 12 March, 2010, 04:18:41 am »

Before I start, I’m sure this requires a ‘Holy crap, he broke his weekly schedule!’ because I just wasn’t getting much info from the idea machine, but whatever.

That’s right, the filler that has the balls to need its own arc. It’ll probably be about four chapters at most before I get on to the final saga. The next chapter will be dedicated to the greatest character ever, and then the next will be about certain characters who haven’t had any kind of backstory whatsoever. The fourth chapter? Well, I won’t mention anything about it at the moment…
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Filler Saga: Chapter 66 – Extreme Scene Investigation

It was a typical summer’s morning, and in a fairly typical house, SA was fast asleep. He was awoken as his alarm clock went off, and then exploded as he leaped out of bed. Suddenly, a boulder appeared out of nowhere and came towards him at blistering speed. He jumped out of the room, where the boulder got lodged between the walls. Then bats came out of nowhere, and SA took them out with ninja stars, slid down the stairs and soared through the air into the kitchen where SA2 and SA3 were eating sandwiches. SA3 passed him one as he arrived, which was basically two square pieces of wood with half a dozen sharp knives in-between. “Have a manwich.”

“Thanks, man.” SA said as he took a bite, and then poured himself a glass of nails.

Just then, SA4 kicked in the door and walked in. “Hey guys, we got business. Serious business.” The others put down their manwiches as she said this and followed her out the door.

They arrived at an apartment building, which had been covered in feces. Everyone had cleared out and there were a group of crime scene investigators examining the area. SA4 was holding a chart, explaining the events in the area. “So what happened here?” SA2 asked.

“There was a report filed in about a poo monster, a few subjects have claimed that it came to life and TP’d this business with its own substance too. That’s pretty damn messed up.”

SA smirked before speaking, “Well it looks like ****,” He promptly put on a pair of shades, “Just got real.”

SA3, who held a guitar in his hands, suddenly yelled, “YEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!” He then started playing it, with enough force to make a car explode in the background as the bold words, “CSI: Central City” suddenly appeared.

Moving slightly ahead and skipping the parody of the opening, the four ninjas were driving down a street in a typical black car, in silence until SA2 finally asked, “So who’s the first witness?”

“The first witness is a girl called Cherry Apples, and she lives at 599 Gumdrop Road, on Creepy Hill.” SA4 replied.

“…You’re kidding, right?”

“There is no kidding when it comes to serious business.”

They soon arrived at Cherry’s haunted mansion, which isn’t as haunted nowadays, and they rang the doorbell. She came to the door, in the artificial body Tails had built for her. She had short brown hair with a bow, blue eyes, and wore a blue and white striped top, with a blue skirt and white stockings. “Hello, mysterious ninjas, may I help you?”

“Yes.” SA4 said, holding up her chart. “We got a report this morning about this factory in downtown Central City which was covered in feces and suffocated some of the staff inside, a monster literally made of the stuff was said to have committed the act. We have no leads whatsoever so we thought we’d ask you what you saw.”

“Oh okay.” She cleared her throat before speaking. “It was horrifying! Sheet flying everywhere! Sheets of paper that is, and then it appeared, and pew! It started spraying itself on the building, causing the workers in the building to die a fate worse than death! Even though they still technically died…but it was just mean! Once he was done being mean, he strolled off like a pimp, got into his friend’s golden Bentley, and they drove off west. The license plate was ‘Big Pimping’.”

“How do you even know all this?” SA asked.

“Because I’m a ghost.”

“That’s not a very clear answer…”

“Well I hope you find who you’re looking for, bye!” She quickly closed the door just before the ninjas left.  They quickly drove back to the scene of the crime and drove west, looking for the Bentley as hey did. They eventually found it parked by a convenience store, which is convenient. As SA2 entered the store, he found the feces talking to the store owner, who was a sponge.

Upon noticing him, the feces grabbed Sally Sue who happened to be shopping nearby and put his desert eagle to her head. “Make a wrong move and the girl gets it!”

Sally Sue was utterly confused over the ordeal. “Hey, what’s going on here? Is that a camera?” She asked, looking behind SA2. “I’m on TV? Hi, Mary and Purity! Look, I’m a TV star!” She exclaimed, waving at the camera.

“Hey, stop that!” The feces responded. Sally elbowed him, making him jerk back, at which point SA2 fly kicked him, knocking him to the ground. He picked up his desert eagle and shot at SA2, who quickly hide down one of the aisles. The feces quickly made his way out and into the Bentley, as his partner immediately drove off. SA2 hopped onto the ninja car and they promptly took off after them.

They soon reached the highway after drifting through the streets, and were driving side-by-side with the Bentley. The passenger pulled out a rocket launcher and hopped onto the roof, just before he started firing at the ninjas, though SA4 managed to evade the large blasts, even driving on two wheels in order to do so. The driver aimed at SA with a minigun and started firing, though SA was capable of deflecting the bullets with his fists. Meanwhile, a man driving an ice cream truck had become fed up with them, so he took out a laser cannon and fired at them both, though SA2 was able to deflect most of the shots away from others. SA3 meanwhile wrestled the last feces in the Bentley.

A man driving a lorry drove past them on the opposite lane and briefly smiled as he shook his head and exclaimed, “Those kids and their extreme fight scenes…”

The feces soon arrived at an abandoned building and quickly ran in, shortly before the ninjas arrived at the entrance. They entered the building, making their way through the empty rooms, beating crap and taking names. Shortly afterwards, they arrived in a massive construction area outside where a stickman had just gotten into a bulldozer. “Welcome, ninjas! I am the mastermind behind the feces craping on buildings!”

“But why?” SA3 asked.

“Because I wanted to do it for the lulz! That’s why!”

“That’s bad reasoning.”

“Whatever! You may have gotten this far, but your luck runs out here. You can’t defeat me now!”

SA2 scratched his forehead in confusion. “What the hell are you talking about? You don’t even have any powers or anything, all you’re doing is driving a frickin’ bulldozer! We could easily take you down.”

The stickman laughed upon hearing this. “Fool! You cannot Kung Fu on bulldozer!” (This line is actually from a Kung Fu Panda fanfic, literally called Kung Fu Panda. The line is hilarious even out of context) as he said this, SA and SA2 leaped onto the bulldozer and knocked him out of the driver’s seat with a three hit combo.

SA4 placed a toilet where the stickman was likely to land, and he did, head first. They all had a hearty laugh just before SA2 said, “I guess your lulz led to a crappy ending. You should learn to chill out because you seem a little,” He promptly put on a pair of shades, “Flushed.”

SA3, who once again held a guitar in his hands, suddenly yelled, “YEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!” He then started playing it, with enough force to make a car explode in the background just before the credits started rolling.

---

It was then revealed Sonic and the others were still at Sonya’s beach house, currently watching the show on a regular television set, except that only Sonic, Tails, Amy, Cream and Sonya were in the room and the others had left.

“It was good, but it’s starting to lose its touch.” Sonic said.

“Agreed.” Everyone except Cream said in unison as they nodded.
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« Reply #84 on: 19 March, 2010, 11:36:15 am »

You may be wondering what’s the need for filler in this. Well y’see, truthfully I haven’t confirmed everything that would happen in the last saga, so in case I suddenly decide to change a plot point, or kill someone off unexpectedly, it’s just good to have extra time. Then again, I’m not on a payroll anyway so…
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Filler Saga: Chapter 67 – A Suetiful Summer’s Day

It was the very next day after all the crazy and surprising things that had happened. Open to Mary Sue’s bedroom, which was pretty typical, and all her belongings happened to be yellow or just have a yellow background. She was currently asleep and snoring pretty loudly when Sally burst into the room wearing nothing but a towel. “Wake up, Mary! C’mon, we have to get going!” Sally poked her several times until Mary eventually got up and rubbed the sleep from her eyes.

“Oh, right. What time is it?” She asked.

“It’s 9’o clock, and I need to get my grande double mocha from Starbucks as soon as possible! Oh, and I think Purity used up too much hot water so we have to take a shower together.”

Just then, Purity poked her head in and said, “Actually I just simply had a wash in order to save enough hot water for the both of you, so feel free to have a shower each.”

“Sure thing.” Mary replied, while Sally simply pouted over the news.

A bit later, they were fully dressed in their normal outfits and rushed out the door. On the way there, Purity’s squirrel friends, the field of daffodils and the birds greeted them, ignoring Sally completely. When they reached their local Starbucks, it was soon about to close down, but luckily 2 had opened up further down the street.

Upon entering the store, Sally greeted them, “Good morning, everybody!”

Everyone in the store greeted her by saying, “Sally!” in unison.

She walked up to the counter, where a blonde haired man then said, “How’s life treating you, Ms. Sue?”

“Not that great, oh, and the usual, please.”

Two rather muscular men started a fight at a table further away, knocking over more tables while some others watched. Although Purity was unsure what they were fighting about, she intervened and stopped their fight as she spoke. “Please, gentlemen, there are ways to settle things without violence. Just take a deep breath, remain calm, and talk things out instead.

The two wrestlers gasped, “She’s right! Thank you for showing us the error of our ways, Purity!” They bowed to her.

“It was the least I could do.” Purity replied.

As Sally picked up her Starbucks coffee, she said, “I can’t believe she could settle that argument so fast with little effort.”

“She’s Purity Sue, remember? She’s always been capable of doing that.” Mary replied.

Shortly after, the three Sues left to go to the cinema to see Pure Ownage, the movie, which was said to be more extreme than the television show. On the way there, a civilian suddenly yelled out, “My cat is stuck in that tree!”

Mary immediately turned around and helped her out within a few moments. Soon she heard a voice cry out, “I hurt my back!” She ran over and fly kicked an old man, fixing his back in the process. She then heard someone yell, “Help! I divided by zero!” She looked further ahead and saw a black hole with a kid slowly being sucked into it. She charged at it, leaped up and punched the black hole, causing it to explode. After touching the ground, she said, “Okay, let’s get going, g-”

Before she could finish, she heard a familiar voice yell out, “It’s you again!” She turned to see the Loli Rangers behind her, with Loli Red pointing at her.

“Oh, it’s those girls I beat the other day.” Mary said in a monotone voice.

“You cheated! We demand a rematch!”

Mary sighed. “Fine. Just go on ahead, Sally and Purity, I’ll be there soon.”

As they did so, the Loli Rangers charged at her. She blocked Loli Red’s punch as she kicked Loli Yellow, then dodged Loli Green’s kick before hitting Loli Black with an elbow to the face. She hopped as Red and Green tried to sweep kick her and knocked them out with a roundhouse kick. She then slid towards Loli Blue who was running at her, and hit her with the palm of her hand as she was leaving the area.

On the way back, Mary heard a woman yell, “Help! It’s a lion and I can’t get in the car!” She saw her struggling to open the door, so she sped over to her in a second and punched out the lion instead. She then saw a dragon walking towards the city, and instead of waiting for someone to say something, she immediately punched it out. She then completely healed a man who had been hit by a reckless driver.

After a tiring while of solving other problems, she made her way to the cinema again, but was soon stopped by the Loli Rangers who had gotten there. “Hold it right there!” Loli Red exclaimed. “We’re not giving up until we finally beat you!”

“Then you’re going to die of old age.”

“Well at least we aren’t as old as you!”

“You know, you’re right.” Mary promptly generated a yellow aura and within moments, she turned into a little girl. “Is this better?”

The Loli Rangers were shocked as Loli Red said, “H-How on earth did you do that?”

“I can change my age at will.” She explained.

“Typical.” Loli Green replied.

“Let’s hurry up; the movie starts in just over five minutes.” Mary said. She immediately charged at them and knocked out Loli Red with another roundhouse kick. She grabbed Loli Blue’s wrist as she attacked, and threw her at Loli Yellow, who held up a sign saying, “Ow!” half a second before she was hit. Mary dodged Loli Black’s various punches as she moved back, and then grabbed Loli Green’s leg from behind as she attacked and whacked Loli Black with her before kicking her across the street. As Loli Red got up and charged at her, Mary hit her with a boot to the head. “Are you satisfied now?” Mary changed back before entering the cinema, and surprisingly nobody was nearby to see this.

Later on, while the Sue Sister’s watched their movie, the Loli Rangers walked off, complaining about the continuous curb stomp battles they keep having. “Even though she keeps kicking our asses flawlessly with ease, she’s actually pretty cool.” Loli Black said.

“No!” Loli Red yelled. “She’s not cool; she’s just a big meanie!”

At the point, Cherry approached them and asked, “Hey, are you the Loli Rangers group I heard about?”

“Yes, we are the rangers.” Loli Red replied. After thinking about it, she placed her arm around Cherry’s shoulder. “Walk with us, little girl.”

Over an hour later, the Sue’s emerged from the cinema talking about the movie.

“I felt the T-Rex fighting the grizzly bear was unnecessary.” Sally said.

“I think everything was necessary.” Mary replied. “Rule of cool demands it.”

“The correct term would be taking it up to eleven, or the trope, going beyond the impossible.” Purity pointed out.

“Those still have connections to rule of cool.” Mary retorted.

Suddenly, a phone box started ringing nearby, and Mary answered the phone. “Hello?”

“Hello, Mary Sue.” Said a muffled voice. “I’d like to play a game.” She heard Loli Blue giggling in the background as she continued. “We’ve kidnapped a little girl and we plan to do mean things if you don’t turn up to fight us at full power.”

“But I’ve beaten you guys three times now, meaning it’s not necessary to take you guys seriously.”

“Hey! Don’t write us off like pathetic garbage! Just show up somewhere between Green Forest and White Jungle. We have a neon sign telling you where we are, courtesy of Dojikko-chan.” As she hung up, she turned to Sally and Purity. “There’s just one more thing I gotta do, I’ll meet you later at the bowling alley.” Mary suddenly grew wings and flew off, and the wings were never mentioned again.

In the middle of a jungle, in a clear open space, the Loli Rangers had Cherry tied up to a tree as they waited.

“Is this really the right thing to do?” Loli Green asked.

“We can beat her as long as we use our weapons of choice and get serious.” Loli Red replied. “We’ll surely win this time.”

“So I can properly use my knife collection?” Loli Blue asked, which Red answered with a simply nod. “Hooray!” Loli Blue rejoiced.

“But I heard Mary Sue is able to cancel out any type of attack just through willpower.” Loli Green said.

“I heard she made the Grand Canyon when she slipped on a banana peel.” Loli Black chipped in.

“I heard she can change her physical age at will.” Loli Blue added, getting strange looks from the others before saying, “Oh right, we were all there, sorry, hehehe.”

Loli Yellow held up a sign saying, “I heard she was Chuck Norris’ mentor, and only taught him 40% of what she knows.”

“Lies and slander!” Loli Red yelled. “Regardless of what she’s accomplished, she’s still human, and that’s all that matters.”



Somewhere in the middle of the jungle, White Jungle (Rhythm and Balance) from Sonic Adventure 2 started playing in the background as Mary hopped across tree branches in kid form again. After a few moments, she hopped onto a clear path and hit a speed pad, following the path as it curved diagonally left. She soon hit a spring; wall jumped across various trees, then grabbed a vine and swung over to a path below. She kicked a flying robot, slid under a wooden gate and spin attacked several in midair before running up the wall, leaping across trees higher up, before finally hitting a spring leading to another downhill path where she hit a speed pad.

She moved down the path at lightning speed, evading dozens of spiked robots which were randomly sitting on the path. Along the same path, she soon went through a loop with a small part missing so she was basically running on air, shortly before hitting a ramp and twirling before entering a cave. Upon entering, she quickly turned and hopped up a trail, ran through another loop and jumped up to a path ahead before smashing through several rocks, leading to a another area with a waterfall in the background and ran past it.

She skipped a bit and made it to the Loli Rangers. “Okay, let’s get this over with.” Mary said as she arrived.

“Let’s do it, girls!” Loli Red took out her glowing red sword, Loli Yellow griped her writing board which also functioned as a weapon with its sharp edges, Loli Blue had her knives concealed inside her sweater, Loli Green took out 3 magnums and one she used her mouth to shoot, and Loli Black put on her golden metal gloves and they all struck a pose before charging at her.

As usual, Loli Red was the first to attack, and Mary blocked the blow with one hand and then ducked as Loli Yellow threw her board like a boomerang. Loli Blue had glued several sharp knives to a whip and swung it at her, which Mary flipped over before fly kicking her from behind. Loli Green started firing at her, which Mary dodged, matrix style as she slid over to her, then yelled, “Cannon spike!” as she hit her with a rising kick.

Mary blocked all of Loli Black’s punches before knocking her back with a hadoken. As Loli Blue swung at her with a simple knife, Mary ducked and yelled, “Shoryuken!” as she hit her with an uppercut. Loli Yellow threw her board again, which Mary deflected with a, “Spinning bird kick!”

“She’s using fighting moves from video games?!? This is ridiculous!” Loli Red yelled as Loli Yellow was sent flying in the background. As Mary turned to her, Loli Red glared before dashing at her, slashing at her repeatedly which Mary evaded, shortly before hopping out of the way as Loli Yellow attacked from behind, slicing her board in half. She gasped in horror as she looked down at the two pieces.

“Dojikko-chan! Let’s get this fool!...Dojikko-chan?” She turned around to see Loli Yellow digging a grave. “Oh, sorry about that, you saw it wasn’t my fault.” She then saw Loli Yellow put in a gravestone with the words, “R.I.P Board-kun” on it. “You gave it a name?!?” Loli Red said in confusion.

They then heard Mary yell, “Falcon punch!” As she sent Loli Black flying into a tree before pumping her fist into the air and yelling, “Yes!” Mary started deflecting bullets Loli Green was firing at her, knocking the three guns out of her reach as Mary approached her and simply flicked her nose. They stood in silence for several moments before Mary ran off, at which point Loli Green rubbed her nose. “Ow…”

“That’s it!” Loli Red firmly gripped her sword. “Taste this! Death of a thousand cuts!” She ran at her and repeatedly jabbed at her with the sword, which Mary blocked with ease for a while until she knocked Red back with a, “Knee of Justice!”

As Loli Red got to her feet, Mary then said, “Now let me show you a silly move I just made up.” Mary promptly charged at her, yelling, “Poke of a thousand fingers!” Red, simply flabbergasted by this, had no time to respond, and was hit repeatedly by Mary’s fingers moving at the speed of light, causing partial clothing damage as she dropped to the ground. She clutched the side of her chest as she slowly tried to get to her feet. “Enough playing around, I’ll end this immediately.”

Mary, sensing this as her final attack, prepared to take it head-on. Tsundere-chan charged up her glowing red blade and fired a dozen flaming waves at her. These joined together in a spiralling curved shape and passed right through Mary, completely destroying her arms and legs and leaving the rest of her body on the ground.

The others were stunned at this display as Loli Red turned her back to Mary and put away her sword. “I didn’t want to do this, but you didn’t take us seriously. Nobody has survived that attack in all the previous encounters I’ve had, and it seems not even you could overcome it.”

Mary began to laugh at this, getting some confusing stares from the others nearby. “So nobody has survived it, huh?” Mary’s body leaped up, she then suddenly grew back her arms and legs following a huge shockwave and a fiery red aura as she started yelling, “I guess that really makes me one of the strongest fighters alive! Swift Suester, Panty Striker, OHKO-Girl, the Great Goddess! I deserve some of those names. I’m so awesome that I’ve hanged with Godzilla, mentored the legendary Chuck Norris, break the laws of physics just by existing, punch out black holes, can grown back limps just through willpower, and yes, I really did create holy water!” She dropped to her feet and stared at Tsundere-chan, who was in a state of shock. “You came looking for a fighter, but instead you found a physical god!” Mary assumed a fighting stance as her aura increased. “Now come, and receive divine punishment!”

“T-this is nuts! You shouldn’t even be standing!” Loli Red said as she backed away. “Y-you’re a monster!” Red ran off, with the other rangers following closely.

As they left, Mary took a deep breath, strolled over to Cherry and started humming the results screen theme of Sonic Unleashed as she untied Cherry. “Well, guess I’d better get you home.” Mary said before growing wings and taking off with her.

“Wait, how are you doing this?” Cherry asked.

“It’s best not to ask.”

“That was really cool what you did earlier though. That had a higher chance of being considered a Crowning Moment of Awesome if you weren’t already one of the strongest alive, and you went through with beating them to a pulp.”

“Yeah but don’t tell anyone I was gloating, especially Purity Sue. I don’t want to ruin my image, besides the badass gloating was just to scare off those girls who just wouldn’t leave me alone. Ahh, here’s your house.” Mary dropped off Cherry and waved goodbye before taking off again.

Mary Sue soon arrived at a bowling alley where Sally and Purity currently were, now in her normal form.

“What took you so long?” Sally asked.

“The usual.” Mary replied as she took a seat. “Being me never gets any easier…”
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« Reply #85 on: 02 April, 2010, 05:28:16 pm »

We now move on to this chapter, as it’s the last one which really seems necessary at this point. That’s pretty much all I have to say at this point.
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Filler Saga: Chapter 68 – Cutesy Lovely Loli Rangers

Just like most other days, it was a bright and sunny morning, and Loli Red was walking down a street with a box and several sheets of paper, reading them out loud quietly as she walked. She soon arrived at Loli Green’s house and knocked. She opened the door, wearing the same stoic expression as always before randomly saying, “You’re wearing my green panties again, aren’t you?”

“It happened once, okay?! It’s too early in the morning to be saying things like that!”

“Mind if I ask again later?”

“I forbid you from doing so!”

The two of them left and moved on towards Loli Yellow’s house. They knocked on the door and as Dojikko-chan answered it, they could clearly see she had been crying from her red eyes and stuffy nose, or she might of just had a cold. She raised a piece of paper which said, “Hi guys.”

Tsundere-chan sighed before opening the box and bringing out a brand new board. Loli Yellow gasped as she saw it, at which point Loli Red threw it to her. As she caught it, she hugged the board tightly as the board had a happy face drawn on it. Loli Yellow then hugged Loli Red, which lasted several moments until Tsundere-chan finally said, “You can stop now.”

They went to visit Loli Blue shortly afterwards, who met them halfway there, so they walked towards Loli Black’s house. As she answered the door, Loli Blue approached her, hoping for a hug as she said, “Badass-chan! What’s up, my n-”

Loli Black held her back and simply said, “You’re my friend and all, but if you finish that sentence you won’t be so cheerful.”

“Come on! I’m not allowed N word privileges?”

“No-one is allowed those privileges!”

“She won’t even allow me to say it.” Loli Red added.

“So why did you want all five of us to meet, Tsundere-chan?” Loli Green asked.

“We have work, from the Metallic Council of Maniacal Evil.” Loli Red replied, holding up the papers.

“I think I’ve heard of them before…” Loli Blue commented.

“The guy was all like, ‘Gentlemen!’ from a low angle shot, and they were saying random things. I really couldn’t take it seriously, but that’s not the point. Our job is to find this creature, as it has the Fujin gem in its possession at the moment. We should split up and search the city, oh, and if you happen to see Mary Sue, inform the others. We’ll chase her down and finally beat that good-for-nothing egotistical show-off!” She started angrily stomping the ground.

“I see you losing to her as become a personal issue…” Loli Black said quietly.

They spread out and looked around the city within a 20 block radius. Eventually, Loli Green managed to spot Mary Sue leaving a donut shop with a bag of donuts, and held up her walkie-talkie. “Attention, fellow rangers. I have spotted Mary Sue downtown outside a donut shop.” As Mary heard this, she ran while Loli Green gave chase, giving her coordinates as she did so.

Soon after, Loli Red and Loli Yellow caught up with them, while Loli Red yelled for Mary to slow down so they could beat her up. “Leave me alone! Go away already!” Mary yelled before running round a corner and managing to dodge a punch from Loli Black who waited. Loli Green appeared down one alleyway and started firing at her. The bullets deflected of Mary as she exclaimed, “Stop that! It tickles!” Loli Blue sat on a building and held four knives in the spaces between her fingers just before throwing them at her. Mary stopped them in midair with a roundhouse kick and then jumped down a sewer hole. The Loli Rangers stopped near the hole, but decided not to continue chasing her. 

“Curses! I was sure we would beat her this time!” Tsundere-chan said.

“I heard Mary Sue had a staring contest with Jupiter and won.” Loli Blue commented.

“I heard she knows why kids love cinnamon toast crunch.” Loli Black added.

“I heard she was fast enough to touch MC Hammer.” Loli Yellow wrote down.

“Enough!” Loli Red shouted. “We’ve done this bit! She’s a fake! One day, I shall defeat Mary Awesome Badass Rainbow Sunshine Sue!”

“Is that her full name?” Loli Green asked.

“Ohohohohoho!” Loli Red heard a familiar evil cackle and turned around to face the approaching newcomer. There were three other girls who wore similar outfits, though they had white hair, pink hair, and purple hair. “Douche-chan!” Loli Red confronted the white haired leader. “What are you doing here?”

“It’s Jerk-chan! Get it right!” She corrected her.

“What’s the difference?” Loli Red retorted. “And you still haven’t answered my question. Though I see you brought along Fun-chan and Cool-chan.”

“We’re here to take care of this crazy black creature we’ve been hearing about, so stay out of our way!” Loli White exclaimed.

“Oh no you don’t! This case is ours!” Loli Red replied.

“These guys are gonna make me go mad…” Loli Black said, struggling to hold in a beat.

Loli White laughed at them. “This case is too much for your team to handle, we, on the other hand, are better students at St. Lolita Academy, so it’s only more fitting for competent rangers to handle this situation.”



Loli Black couldn’t hold it in any longer, and immediately took out a boombox in order to play “Get Back” by Ludacris. She then approached Loli White as she was confused and said, “Yo G! Why you all in my ear, talking a whole bunch of crap, when you should disappear? Get back, loli hater, you don’t know us like that!”

“Get back, loli hater, you don’t know us like that!” Loli Blue and Green chipped in, while Loli Red was speechless about the situation.

Loli Black then approached Loli Purple. “Yo G, I ain’t playing around, my golden right fist would knock you to the ground!” She said just before clotheslining the girl. “Get back, loli hater, you don’t know us like that!” She approached Loli Pink moments later, while saying, “So come on, come on, dope!” as she pushed her back, which was played twice. Loli Pink attempted to punch her, but missed as she easily evaded it, then said, “Get swung on, swung on!” as she punched her out, played twice in quick succession. “It’s the laidback, tic and tac, crazy talking, ranger pack, loli’s on the beat, who’ll nail you down with a sneak attack! Still kicking ass!”

Loli Red, who had just kicked Loli White across the street, nodded as she said, “Yup.”

“More action packed!” Loli Black said just as Loli Blue slashed at Loli Pink with a knife while saying, “Yup!”

“And bro, we keep it real like the apple Mac! That’s why I own a yak, a pack of cracker jacks, and at eighteen, I’ll own a Cadillac! But I thought we could go bowling, bowling, we could go bowling or have Super Smash Brawling,-”

“Uhh, I don’t mean to interrupt, but is this all really necessary?” Loli Red asked.

Loli Black ignored her as she kept going on. “So keep your socks on, G, keep the skirts low, trim off the top, bend back and have your face blown!” She said as she kicked Loli Purple in the stomach, then grabbed her and did a spinning german suplex.

“I think we should skip this…” Loli Red finally said.

“Hey, little red, don’t make me loooose it!” Loli Black yelled at her for suggesting it.

A little later, they continued their search, though they were now looking for the person holding the Fujin gem. Loli Yellow soon discovered the target was Lily, who sat on a grassy hill, looking up at the sky. Lily noticed her as she advanced on her and said, “So you finally found me, huh? You didn’t come here by yourself, did you?”

“My team will be here shortly.” Loli Yellow wrote down.

“Why are you using a board?” Lily asked as she pointed at it.

She quickly wrote, “I can’t speak English.” Which Lily nodded at as she understood. Very shortly, the other rangers did arrive, and immediately attacked her.  Seeing as taking on five at once would be stressful, she quickly fired a piece of black substance which hit Loli Green and glued her to the grass. She began blocking Loli Red’s repeated swings before kicking her in the stomach, then ducked as Loli Black flew by with a punch, just before extending her arms to grab and choke Loli Yellow before throwing her into Loli Red.

Loli Blue rushed in and with a knife, slashed her across the chest upwards, tearing the black substance and revealing a part of her old clothes. The organism quickly worked to reform itself as Lily grabbed Blue’s arm and began to corrupt her with the black substance. Loli Black kicked her from the side, stopping Lily, while Loli Yellow threw her board. Lily caught the board and threw it off the hill, then watched as Loli Yellow panicked and dove after it. She then grabbed Loli Blue and ran as the others were fully ready.

At that moment, Loli Yellow had finished climbing up the hill with her board and gave them a thumbs up. They then immediately took off after Lily.

“So why am I the hostage?” Loli Blue asked as they jumped across cars in the street.

“I don’t know, I’ve just always wanted to actually take someone hostage in a chase.”

“Well I’ve always wanted to be a hostage.” Blue replied. “I’m okay with an assassination job though.”

“You seem too cheery for assassination jobs…”

The Loli Rangers continued to chase her, leading onto the highway where Lily caused numerous crashes by tipping over cars with her tentacles and firing energy blasts at the girls while they dodged and deflected them. Upon reaching the next town, Lily quickly dropped down into a sewer, though the other rangers chose to follow her this time. After a short and unexplained chase through the sewers, Lily leaped up a ladder to the surface again, where Loli Blue stabbed Lily in the chest, making her drop the girl as she continued running.

The other rangers quickly caught up once again and all five of them stood together. One man pointed at them and began speaking. “It’s the Loli Rangers! Loli Yellow, the Japanese loli, who doesn’t speak English so she uses a wipe board to communicate, which can also be used as a weapon with its razor sharp edges! You work at a maid café in your spare time. Loli Green, when not finding absurd ways to handle guns, you work as a high school PE teacher. Loli Blue, though you are abnormally cheerful, you’re an assassin who takes pleasure in chasing your targets down and gutting them. Loli Black, you hit like a brick house, and on your time off, you work as a professional DJ, “Miss Mix-a-Few.” And finally, Loli Red. Known by the name, “Little Red Riding Slayer.” That glowing sword is her weapon, and you’ve slayed countless creatures over the years with it. 

Loli Yellow turned to him and wrote, “Please don’t pad this out with our life story.”



Loli Red pointed to the sky and suddenly exclaimed, “Come on, guys, its morphing time!” As the theme began playing, Loli Red touched her red watch, materializing a red spandex suit onto herself, along with a red helmet complete with a bow as she yelled, “Tsundere-chan!”

Loli Green did the same as she calmly said, “Kuudere-chan.” Loli Blue followed suit as she yelled, “Yandere-chan!” Then surprisingly, Loli Yellow normally said, “Dojikko-chan.” And finally, Loli Black who exclaimed, “Badass-chan!” As they finished, they united their multicoloured watches and called forth Robo Magical Girl, Moe-chan, which was formed using the five parts the girls owned. Kuudere-chan’s part formed the two green arms; Yandere-chan’s formed the two blue legs, Badass-chan formed the black torso, Tsundere-chan formed the red head, and Dojikko-chan’s final part made a mechanical staff which Moe-chan grabbed as it landed in the middle of the street, shortly before the five girls hopped into the cockpit.

Lily had stopped to watch this, and was simply astounded by what she witnessed that she only had one thing to say. “What the hell?”

“Lovely beam!” The robot yelled as it fired a white beam from its staff which Lily dodged before punching it in the face.

“You guys are really getting on my nerves with your lame magical girl parody.” Lily commented.

“Body slam!” The robot yelled as it did so on the roof of a building where Lily stood. She leaped off as she yelled, “Why are you using a wrestling move?!?”

Lily punched it again with enough force to knock them over. The rangers inside the cockpit were thrown back due to the force and Loli Red fell on top of Loli Green, who then said, “Tsundere-chan, you’re wearing green again.”

“S-shut up! Now’s not the time to be talking about what colour my panties are!”

“Are they comfortable?”

“What the hell is wrong with you?!”

Moe-chan soon regained its composure and charged at Lily, yelling, “Pork chop sandwiches!”

“Look, will you morons stop and listen to me for one moment!” Lily shouted at the top of her lungs. The Loli Rangers agreed to this and stopped a few feet from her. Lily sighed in relief as they did so and hopped onto a building. “Look, I know you have a job to do, but could you let this one slide? I really need this, because I’m not even human anymore, and I figured since this was able to open a gate to another dimension, maybe it could fully heal me and I could go back to living normally. You don’t understand how you can’t visit your friends and family because they would find out you’ve turned into a freak! I beg of you, would you let me try to get my life back and be with my loved ones again?”

Loli Green, Black, Yellow and Blue were clearly depressed after hearing her out. Green turned to Loli Red and said, “What do you think, Tsundere-chan?” Red was currently whipping tears from her eyes and trying not to cry as she said, “N-no, I’m not crying! I just have something in my eye! Okay, we’ll let this one go, but next time there’ll be no excuses!”

“Really?” Lily replied. “Thanks! And here I thought you guys were evil.”

“We’re neither.” Loli Blue began. “We just work for however is paying us. But we have to go now, so bye-bye, crazy lady!” She waved as Moe-chan turned around and flew off.

“So what now, Tsundere-chan? Don’t we need that money?” Loli Black asked.

“Don’t worry, we’ll get it. There are always other jobs available for us.” She then smiled. “For now, let’s see what’s available at Lolita Academy.” They flew off over the horizon in their giant robot.
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« Reply #86 on: 09 April, 2010, 10:38:46 am »

So yeah. This chapter will pretty much destroy any sort of seriousness this had, which is to be expected at this point. This is generally some of the things I think associated with some of the characters in this story, in a funny way, of course. I had to even rush it halfway through as it was getting pretty damn long. So, enjoy.
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Filler Saga: Chapter 69 – Behind the Scenes of Sonic Z

Somewhere very far away, on a regular peaceful morning, SA2 was walking towards a large building with a camera, speaking as he did so. “Today is a special edition episode, folks, as we’ll be talking to a majority of the cast this morning. Let’s get started.” SA2 entered the large building, waved to several of the personnel which he walked by as he went through the various rooms, and soon approached Sonic’s door by the start of a long hallway.

He entered and sat a bit away from Sonic, who greeted him as he entered as the name and subtitle appeared beside Sonic, “Sonic the Hedgehog – Main Character.”

“So Sonic,” SA2 began. “How do you find it working here?”

“It’s pretty good, because I’m the star of the show after all. I get along with pretty much everyone around here, except the really stubborn people like Shadow, who’s a lot more stubborn off the show, surprisingly.”

“Even half the bad guys?”

“Yeah, besides Metal Sonic, I get along with them. Me and Eggman even went go-karting recently, it’s a rivalry thing, you know. Because I get top billing, I’m allowed to change anything in my part of the script if I don’t like the characterization of the scene, for myself and how others react to me.”

“Even if they object?”

“Hey, I don’t see their names in the title, do you?”

“Good point…”

SA2 quickly moved to Tails’ dressing room, where he was working on a robot laid out in front of him as the words, “Miles “Tails” Prower – The Smart Guy.” appeared.

“So Tails, how do you like your role on the show?” SA2 asked.

“It’s pretty good. I’ve been known to play at least a small part in almost every saga starting from my own. I’m not sure whether a few of the writers took a liking to me, or if it was just a coincidence.”

“Do you ever feel they aren’t doing enough for you in terms of characterization?”

“Sonic mentioned that, right? Obviously, our close bond isn’t fake, but he can be a little demanding when things aren’t going his way. I think my character’s portrayal is pretty good, being a high-tech genius who mainly uses his brain for battles and explains to such a high calibre that people tend to not listen, but that last part isn’t used much. If it was used regularly, it’d probably involve Wikipedia. Oh, and the whole gay thing is entirely played for laughs…at least I hope so.”

Once again, SA2 quickly moved on and found Knuckles in a gym nearby, punching a boxing bag while Shadow was on the other side lifting weights. As SA2 approached him, the words, “Knuckles the Echidna – Knucklehead.” appeared.

“Hello there, Knuckles. This will take just a minute. How do you find the show in general?” SA2 asked.

“Well, when everyone works together and exchange ideas, allowing free speech and a bit of individuality, we get a lot done and everyone has a good time. It’s fun to be around these guys because they’re competent, but also want to have a little fun at the same time, which is why I don’t mind being branded an easily frustrated hothead who is occasionally portrayed as a moron and tricked regularly.”

“But you kinda are, and it’s not that exaggerated on the show.” SA2 pointed out.

“Oh, are you calling me stupid? You’re trying to start a fight?” SA2 backed away and left as Knuckles turned to him. SA2 had lost sight of Shadow during his brief talk with Knuckles and soon found Blaze sitting at one table in a large room with a cup of coffee.

The words appeared again as SA2 took a seat, “Blaze the Cat – Oh god she’s so kewl!” He cleared his throat before speaking, “Sorry to interrupt you during your break but do you have a minute?”

“I may.”

“So Blaze, do you have anything to say about the show?”

“Well, the interpretation on my character is…amusing, in a sense.”

“How so?”

“She seems to appear and vanish somewhat suddenly, and seems to mostly be serious, in a comical monotone way, which would come off deadpan or bizarre instead of jerkish. The concept of bringing me in, then adding an unneeded and illogical plot device to keep me on screen was a bit of a stretch, but it seemed fine, as I seem to be popular regardless of what I appear in nowadays. Fans always going on about how ‘kewl’ I am, and a few asking if they can stroke me, and that’s when I call security.”

SA2 got up and bowed. “Okay, thank you for your time, Blaze.”

“It was my pleasure.” She said as she sipped her coffee shortly before SA2 moved on and found Amy and Cream at a table near the exit. The titles appeared again, “Amy Rose – Stalker in Denial.” And “Cream the Rabbit – May Cause Diabettus.” They waved as he approached them and sat down.

“Okay, we’ll start with you, Amy. How’s your opinion of this place?” SA2 asked.

“Well, it’s fine I guess, but some elements in the show have some unfortunate circumstances.”

“Yeah!” Cream chipped in before Amy continued.

“First of all, the stalking thing. It should have really been resolved ages ago, and we all know if our genders were reserved, Sonic who have gotten arrested by now. Off the show, we’re an actual couple…until we broke up, then got back together again, then broke up, then made up, then broke up, then made up, then-”

SA2 quirked an eyebrow while Cream nudged her. “Amy, you’re going off-track.”

“Oh right.” She regained her composure, “And another thing, why is it that to be of any help, I had to get a boost in ability from Virus’ weird thing?”

“Yeah! The same thing for my Supreme Ninja form! It’s not super at all!” Cream chipped in again.

 “It’s basically saying we can’t compete with half the other cast when it comes to serious business if we don’t have some cheap power-up!”

“But that’s kinda true…” SA2 pointed out.

“But that’s not the point!”

“But Sonic has speed, Tails has flight and his brains, and Knuckles has power. What special ability do you have?”

After a few moments of silence, Cream then said, “She has a hammer.”

“Enough!” Amy stood up. “I’ll see you in court for being a douche!” She exclaimed as she left.

A bit later in one hallway, SA2 ran into Shadow and Rouge, standing outside Omega’s room talking. The titles appeared once more, “Shadow the Hedgehog – Possibly a faker.”, “Rouge the Bat – The less said, the better…”

“Hey guys, could we have a quick chat for a minute?” SA2 asked. They turned to him and waited for him to speak. “So, opinions on the show, and portrayals of yourselves.”

Shadow started off. “Seeing how this goes for more of a comedy aspect, you’ll notice I don’t say a lot, because I’m generally not the type to spout lame jokes constantly like a certain other hedgehog. It can be hard to keep in character while trying to be funny, but I believe we do okay. We all try our best, so that makes the others tolerable at least.”

Rouge went next. “I get even less lines than Shadow, probably due to my characterization being slightly harder to get right without making me sound like a wh-”

“Let’s keep it clean, folks.” SA2 quickly interrupted.

“Sorry. Anyway, that just means more free time, but a slightly less pay check…so I regularly borrow money from Shadow and Knuckles, and also Tails on occasions.”

As Shadow glared at her, SA2 then asked, “Is Omega in there?”

“Yeah but he doesn’t like people asking questions, it’s best to move on.” Shadow replied. SA2 did so, and soon walked past Team Chaotix, not stopping to talk to them. In a lounge area, Crystal, Amber, Sonny and Shade were playing Super Smash Bros. Brawl as Mads watched soon when SA2 entered and approached them. “Hey there, may I have a quick word.”

They paused their game and turned to him, at which point the titles struck with the force of a thousand suns. “Sonny the Hedgehog – Shapeshifting Recolour?”, “Shade the Hedgehog – What is he exactly?”, “Crystal Clear – Your Mileage May Vary.”, “Amber Salsar – Look up Crystal.”, “Mads Andersen – People love that talkshow bit in Chapter 21.”

“Okay, whenever you feel the need to say what you think, go ahead, because it’s wearing me down…” SA2 said.

Mads began first. “Though I don’t get as much screen time as Crystal and Amber, I’m still kinda likeable, but that seems to be mainly due to my talkshow skits, which are rather nonexistent now, but it’s cool. I’m an easy going person, so I can get along with almost anyone and have a good time, and drinking would speed up that process.

Sonny went next. “Until recently, I was rarely ever seen, and that kinda sucks. I’ve barely done anything except to be just, there.”

“I sympathize with the ice hedgehog.” Shade added. “By the way, the reason we look like this is because we originally joined from somewhere else, but that’s not important.”

Amber spoke immediately afterwards. “Well, there isn’t much to say, I act the same off set as I do on set, but less exaggerated. I think my character’s actions are also quite immoral and partially offensive, in regards to a certain few moments, but it’s played for laughs so it’s sort of okay…except its not. Also, I’m fine with everyone, even Tails. If I could, I’d totally kidnap him and take him home.” SA2 laughed for a few seconds before she shook her head. “I’m not kidding either.”

Crystal was the last to speak. “I’m not as ditzy on the show as in real life, those who’ve seen my other appearances like some of the movies I’ve done probably know. Whether you see her as annoying or somewhat funny can vary, regularly. Half the time when playing her, I was just told to act aloof and somewhat childish, which is just a façade towards most people who know her. She’s also quite honest gives out too much information on occasions, like the running gag of her giving out her measurements, which continue to make less sense as it goes on…and no, you won’t get my real measurements. This was originally gonna be passed down to Ruby recently, but it was dropped.”

“Okay, I’m going to go now, thank you for your time.” SA2 said as he left while they waved goodbye. SA2 looked on his list and saw he still had some villains left and a few others who joined recently to do. He found Eggman’s dressing room shortly, where Eggman and Eggman Nega were sitting in chairs opposite the door, obviously waiting for him. “Eggman – Let’s not start the name debate, people…”, “Eggman Nega – Feel free to use your own Negative joke here.” As he took a seat, Eggman began.

“I feel I haven’t gotten as much screen time as I should be, possibly due to focusing the villainy on Virus and his various companions. My character has undergone much badass decay and lost credibility over the years, which is why screen time is needed to boost it again. Right now my character is the villain on the sidelines while Virus is getting top billing! I shall protest for a plot twist to put me in the starring role!”

“Good for you, Eggman.” SA2 replied.

“I don’t even appear much anymore to take enough credit.” Eggman Nega sighed. “During our villain team up I still didn’t get much attention. It’s a shame really.”

SA2 nodded. “Yes, it is.” He then left and visited Virus. Virus flew in from the wall as he entered the room and the title appeared, “Virus – Big Bad.”

“So, Virus, tell me about your experiences as the main bad guy on this show.” SA2 said.

“Well, when I signed up, I didn’t know what he was like. They said to play a sophisticated evil being who could be taken seriously, but was still funny. As seen recently, I’m getting better, and a big percentage of his funniness seems to be unintentional on his part. Since being assigned to work with Rose and Lily, we’ve become good friends off the set and hang out often, and Shadow and I have as much of a rivalry off set as well. That’s pretty much the gist of it.”

Once again, SA2 waved goodbye and moved on fast, as this was beginning to get incredibly long. He met Lily in her room, who was eating a piece of cake and watching TV as he came in. She finished it and turned to him as the title struck with a vengeance, “Lily Locket – Unpopular Popular Character and Resident Fourth Wall Breaker.”

“I don’t really know where to begin…” SA2 said.

“I’ll start it. When I started this, I was told the Lily was a devious type of character who was a light-hearted, plucky comic relief girl who acted that way to catch others off-guard. I took that character and went further with it, adding in any lines I could during filming. Some of these were good enough to add to the script, and eventually when the character was well received, they gave me a little more freedom to say funny lines and break the fourth wall often. She’s like Deadpool’s younger sister; at least if given complete freedom she would be…in a sense. I left for a short while to shoot a film so I asked them to kill me off, but I figured I’d still come back for a short bit, and since they had no plans for Inferno, they bonded my character with the organism, against her will anyway…or did they?”

“I honestly don’t know.” SA2 said, clearly bored.

“Me either. Lily is really a genius ditz though, that even though she has a high IQ nearing those like Tails and Eggman, she’s not smart enough to compete directly with her own resources, but being observant and thinking ahead is one of her strengths. She’s also too lazy to put in the effort like they do.

“Well thank you for the info, I’ll be going now.” SA2 said as he got up.

“Thanks for listening, also, Rose is down there just so you know.” Lily said, pointing right.

SA2 followed the path right, which lead to a fountain where Rose was quieting watching the rushing water, and then waved as she saw SA2 get close by. “Rose Rivers – Defrosting Ice Assassin.”

“Annnnnd go!” SA2 said as he stopped beside her.

“Well, the portrayal of me on the show and the actual me are entirely different, besides the politeness, that’s pretty spot-on. I’m pretty outgoing just like Lily, and before you ask, yes, we are really best friends, but you probably knew.”

“Yeah, I did. Does anyone ask about how you act differently in person?”

“A lot of people, but you can’t expect people to act the same everywhere. With Rose she’s just somewhat anti-social due to her line of business, because she’s good at it. Obviously having someone around like Lily would frustrate her quite a lot. Because of this she practically comments on anything stupid or bizarre Lily says, which is around 80% of the time.”

“Thank you, but now I gotta go, little time and all.” SA2 took off as Rose waved goodbye. SA2 eventually spotted Mary Sue and Sally Sue by a vending machine and approached them. “Mary Sue – Gamebreaker Goddess.”, “Sally Sue – Primary Mary Sue Parody.”

“Hey guys, could you give me the rundown on your particular characters?” SA2 asked.

“Sure,” Sally replied. “My character was as mentioned before, a primary parody of the Mary Sue concept, made to outline the bad quirks and make Sally look like a complete overpowered ****. She was originally a very minor villain and only showed up occasionally until halfway through where she actually had an active role. She’s basically the unfavorite of the family because of her attitude of being a jerk to almost everyone but her sisters, Mary in particular, which borders on Sister-Sister incest.”

“Which makes our relationship even more disturbing.” Mary added. “Obviously, my character is a direct parody of the character, even being named as such to classify it. Even before being introduced, she was talked about as if she was a god, and breaks the laws of physics just by existing. She’s pretty much good at everything regardless if she’s done it or not, and people regularly praise her for it, which she doesn’t want. Even though she can beat almost anyone just by yawning and could break all of the Guinness world records within a day, she just wants to be left in peace to enjoy a normal life, so she’s pretty much heroic neutral. Sure, she’ll stop a bad guy, but only if he hurt someone she knew, or if there’s no-one else to do so.”

Once again, SA2 left and just further down the hallway he met Cherry, leaning on the wall and smoking a cigarette. “Cherry Apples – Deliberately Cute Ghost Girl.” She moved her head right as she started walking, “We’re gonna talk, right? Follow me.” She offered SA2 a cigarette, but he hasty declined. “So yeah, I play the cute chick. I have to act like a little girl who’s sweet and crap and says the word ‘mean’ in half her sentences. It’s ridiculous how brain-dead the kid seems.”

“Do you always smoke?” SA2 asked.

“Only when I’m stressed. I don’t know what the hell I’m doing, man. I’m frickin’ tripping balls, bro! I’m totally buzzing!” She said with a smirk. “Just don’t be hating on how I wanna live my life. It’s now or never, man, we ain’t gonna live forever. I just wanna live while I’m alive.”

“Now you’re just secretly singing…”

As SA walked by them, Cherry smacked his ass and nodded. “Nice ass, man. Stop by my room later tonight if you’re looking for a good time. You can be as mean as you want!” Cherry yelled as SA ran and jumped out a window. She shook her head in disappointment. “Honestly, what’s up with half the guys around here? Do I have to choke a bi-”

“No!” SA2 shouted, interrupting her. “Language! Anyway, I have to go, take care.” SA2 quickly took off. He finally met the Loli Rangers in a recording studio, with Loli Green and Blue rehearsing their lines as he entered. They each quickly took a seat form left to right: Loli Black, Yellow, Red, Blue and Green. Suddenly, titles! Five of them! “Badass-chan – Token Black Girl.”, “Loli Yellow – Cute Mute…sort of.”, “Loli Red – Designated Leader.”, “Loli Blue – Happy Nutcase.”, “Loli Green - …”

“So, I wanna make this one quick, so just lay down your thoughts, Tsundere-chan.” SA2 said.

“Well, as said, we’re the Loli Rangers, a group of five little girls who are an obvious parody of the Power Rangers as stereotyped figures, apart from Badass-chan’s name which was made up for no apparent reason.”

“Damn straight.” Loli Black nodded.

“We all have our quirks, such as me being short-tempered and easily frustrated, Kuudere-chan being soft spoken, easily distracted and more observant, Yandere-chan being happy-go-lucky, yet a complete psychopath, Badass-chan being a typical black girl exaggerated to a high degree, and Dojikko-chan being Japanese and using a board to speak, as well as working as a maid and only occasionally tripping.”

“I really can speak English though.” Loli Yellow pointed out.

Loli Red continued. “The Loli Rangers aren’t the only group around with that title, but they’re the most well-known students from their academy, and they simply use the title to do jobs to earn money. They don’t really care about good and evil, unlike most of the other cast; they’ll simply work for anyone who hires them. Is that good enough?”

“That’s perfect. Well take care, girls.” SA2 waved goodbye as they did the same, and then began speaking as he left and headed for the exit. “So, that’s all we have time for today, and I hope you enjoyed this. After witnessing this, there’s only one thing I’m sure most people can agree on: In comparison to the actual story or just the premise, this is pretty ****ed up.”
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« Reply #87 on: 23 April, 2010, 05:24:18 pm »

This is it. The big one, the climax, the main reason you probably bothered to continue past the Mary Sue saga. It’s been over a year, but it’s finally close to the end. The plot has been set, the lulz have taken their positions, now let us begin!
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Doomsday Saga: Chapter 70 – The Sega Carnival

It had been a week after the Loli Rangers turned down their mission of taking the Fujin Gem, in chapter 68 for those who forgot. On a peaceful morning somewhere in China, Sonic and Sonya were getting ready on a clear path as Dragon Road Day played in the background. After a few moments, they took off, running at a steady speed soon before turning around the four corners of a house, jumping over a lake and onto the top path of the road ahead. They ran along, turning left and right along it as the path branched over more water, then they jumped across circling platforms shortly before hitting the ground and running towards a city.

Sonic ran on ahead in the middle of a festival, leaped onto a Chinese dragon replica, and jumped over some people then dashed in between several others, drifted round a corner just before jumping over another dragon, sliding under one, then hopping in-between two more. Meanwhile Sonya took another path with a bunch of shops nearby and ran along a randomly placed xylophone, jumped to another one across the street, twirled and hopped across two in a row before running backwards along the next one, sliding across the one which followed, speeding along the next while doing a handstand, and twirled across the next two before touching the ground again.

Sonic leaped onto a straight red path above water where he ran before going through a loop, and then followed the path as it spiralled downwards shortly before he hit a ramp. Sonya approached the area from below and hit a different ramp which launched her across a number of springs attached to rock pillars. She soon hit the water with a splash and ran across it, turning occasionally until she got back on land where she met up with Sonic. They ran across a bridge and then up a path that hadn’t been fully constructed.

They jumped towards the path far ahead, but as they couldn’t reach it, Sonic grabbed Sonya’s hand and threw her ahead, while she did the same to him, which carried on until they somehow made it across. They sped off at full speed, through loops and circulating pathways as they continued.

Somewhere else, Tails, Amy and Cream were waiting by the entrance of the Sega carnival, where the streets were quite lively. Soon enough, Sonic and Sonya eventually arrived, and Sonic greeted them as he waved, “Hey guys, sorry we’re late. We ended up in China somehow, and I felt compelled to do the strangest things…”

“Well since the carnival is only in town for a day, we should make the most of today.” Amy replied.

“What is this place anyway?” Sonya asked.

“The Sega carnival.” Amy replied. “We were told about it ages ago.”

Just then, SA2 approached them. “Hey, it’s you guys again! Well enjoy your stay at the Sega carnival!”

“Do we know you from somewhere, Mister?” Cream asked.

“Of course not, in fact, I was never here.” SA2 suddenly vanished, causing an awkward silence for a few moments.

Sonic finally said, “Well then, let’s begin the fun montage!” The others pumped their fists into the air as they yelled, “Yeah!” in unison.



And so began the theme of SEGA carnival as they walked into the lively area, shortly before performing a robot style spontaneous dance routine as they lined up. It soon cut to a scene of Amy and Cream crossing a bouncing castle while Sonya spin jumped through it, and then to a scene where Sonic, Tails, Amy and Cream posed in front of a black board with the Sega logo on it as Sonya took a picture. In another scene, Sonic and Tails went down a water slide, with Sonic nearly drowning afterwards. In another, Amy played a typical hammer game and managed to hit the bell at the top. It then cut to a short scene of them dancing in the streets again.

In another scene, Tails managed to hit most of the targets in a shooting gallery and won a NiGHTS t-shirt. Meanwhile, Sonya, Amy and Cream were in an art gallery indoors, looking at pictures of T-Rex’s flying exploding jets, a couple sailing across the sea at night, and daffodils playing guitars respectively. The five of them went on a small boat ride in the dark where they randomly sprayed the five of them with water at random times. Shortly after, the five of them went on go-karts.

Inside a shop, Amy and Cream spotted a giant keyboard stuck to the floor, which they decided to play on by dancing on it. After several moments, it cut to a scene of the five of them on a rollercoaster, which twisted and turned in several different directions over the course of the ride, and then the theme soon stopped after they got off.

“Hey Tails, how long has it been?” Sonic asked.

“About an hour.” Tails replied.

“Wow, that was pretty short…”

Just then, as if right on que, as they stood in the middle of the carnival, a large widescreen ahead of them switched on, and they were greeted by the sight of Mary Sue in kid form. “Greetings, fellow citizens, my name is Marie Sue, and I am here today to bring you another form of entertainment!”

Amy pointed at the screen and said, “Hey, isn’t that-”

“Yeah, it’s her.” Sonic and Sonya said in unison.

Mary Sue continued. “Today, I figured since there was a carnival, and I was in such a good mood, I too would participate, and I have done so by organizing a tournament!”

“Haven’t we done the tournament thing before?” Tails asked.

“Not one hosted by the Great Goddess, Mary Sue.” Sonya replied.

Mary went on once again. “In a short while, those who wish to take part must proceed to the town square, where the tournament will be held, and sign up, and then take a number. The amusing part is that it won’t be one-on-one, the contestants will be partnered up, preferably five really strong fighters for my own amusement. My sister, Sally Sue, has agreed to fight all teams which make it to round 3, so I suggest you take this seriously. I look forward to seeing certain people there, so until then, take care.” The screen switched off, and everyone continued what they were doing except Sonic and the others, who stood there in silence.

Mary, Sally and Purity were currently in a dark room, and as Mary ended the transmission, Purity switched on the lights. “Well it’s done.” Mary said as she reverted to her adult form.

“I still don’t see why you’ve decided to go through with this unnecessary tournament.” Purity said.

“Because I feel today is going to be an amazing day, and I can’t pass up this opportunity.” Mary replied. “Plus Sally is fine with this idea too.”

“Yeah!” Sally agreed. “I’ll do what I can to make the tournament up to Mary’s standards!” she said, putting her hand against her chest.

“You don’t have to go that far…” She said nervously. “Anyway, I just have this feeling about today, like some kind of doom is to follow…the good kind, of course.”

“Ahh, of course.” Purity humoured her as she left, which frustrated Mary in return.

Meanwhile, somewhere far from the carnival, Virus and the Loli Rangers met by a cliff. “What did you call us for, Virus?” Loli Red asked. “Loli Green and I were singing the Pokemon theme on stage at the carnival.”

“Yes.” Loli Green nodded.

“I called you to confirm the plan.” Virus responded. “I’ve waited long enough to finally make my move. I figure some of the components are in place, so now would be a good time to strike.”

Loli Black raised her hand. “We’re still getting paid, right?”

Virus sighed. “Of course.”

“Just making sure.” Loli Black said before lowering her hand.
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« Reply #88 on: 30 April, 2010, 10:19:32 am »

There's no attempt at being funny this week with the pre-chapter comment. Go away.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Doomsday Saga: Chapter 71 – Mary Sue's Ultimate Tournament

Shortly after the events of the previous chapter, Sonic and the others moved along to where the tournament was planning to be held. They walked along a clear stoned pavement with hundreds of others towards a large grey arena just outside of the carnival. Inside, there were currently various queues for taking part, and for simply taking a seat to watch. Sonic looked around before saying, "Well, we should probably sign up quickly."

Cream twiddled her thumbs as she said, "Umm, I don't really like violence so I'm not going to sign up."

"Well you've beat up robots before."

"But I didn't have much of a choice before..."

"Fine, I respect your opinion."

Sonya then said, "Uhh, yeah, I think I'm gonna sit this one out."

"What?! You too? Come on! Why don't you wanna do this?" Sonic asked.

"I'm just not feeling it, y'know?"

"But you're me! How can you not feel it?!"

"I'm just not."

Just then, Knuckles approached them and waved as he got near. "Hey guys, good to see you again."

Sonic smirked as he turned to face Knuckles. "Ahh, Knuckles, old buddy! Just the hothead I was looking for!"

Knuckles narrowed his eyes at him as he said, "Don't bother; I was going to join anyway. I heard there would be another tournament today, so I thought I'd participate for a little while."

"But what about the Master Emerald?" Tails asked.

"It's okay, I won't be too long." Knuckles shrugged.

"You really should start doing your job..." Sonya said quietly.

Meanwhile, the Loli Rangers were walking down a corridor with doors on both sides, near the arena. Loli Green started talking as they did. "So we basically just try out, and get to the final round to provide a distraction?"

"Pretty much." Loli Red replied.

Loli Yellow held up a board which said, "You guys do realize helping Virus out would be a bad idea, regardless of how much money we get, right?" but the others ignored her, causing her to sigh.

"I'm gonna use some of my money to visit my uncle! He's a serial killer, y'know!" Loli Blue randomly said.

"I has no parents." Loli Green began. "I mean, they're always working, it's okay though."

Loli Yellow tapped Loli Black, who turned to look at her board and quirked an eyebrow. "Who would you is?"

Loli Yellow looked down at it and fixed the mistake, with it now saying, "Who would you see?"

Loli Black shrugged. "No idea, probably I'd just go on holiday. Somewhere on one of those beaches where I can walk around ****."

Loli Yellow quickly wrote down, "Who would want to see that?" but was ignored as Loli Red pointed ahead and yelled, "You!" as she spotted Mary Sue leaning against a wall.

She welcomed them as they rushed over to her. "Hey, I knew you guys would show up here. It's one of the main reasons I decided to make this 5-vs-5 matches."

Loli Red paused for a second. "Huh? You did that for us?"

"Not just you, there are also others I hope to see, plus isn't it more fun this way?"

"She's got a point." Loli Green replied. Loli Red nodded in response, and then turned to her and said, "And no, Kuudere-chan, I'm not wearing green today."

She wiped a tear from her eye. "I see...you don't consider us best friends anymore..."

Mary shook her head in disgust as Loli Green started sobbing. "Tsundere-chan! How could you!"

Loli Red was shocked so much she couldn't form words at first. "Wha...but...you and..." She quickly sighed. "There's nothing wrong with green, Kuudere-chan."

"Okay." She replied as she immediately stopped sobbing, frustrating Loli Red.

Back around the queues, Sonic, Tails, Knuckles, Amy and Cream were standing near one table talking.

"So we have four people now." Sonic said. "We need one more to average it out."

"But who do we know who's actually in the area?" Amy asked.

Sonic then noticed Rose sitting on a ledge further away and sped over to her. "Hey Rose, we need a fifth member, and we'd really appreciate your help. You wanna join us?"

"I am pleased that you would consider me, but I simply came to watch."

Sonya appeared and whispered, "Besides, why do you want her anyway?"

"Well, when she was a villain, she was pretty damn strong. If she was with us, winning wouldn't be that much of a problem."

"Yeah, but you know the rules. If a villain is beaten and decides to be good, they suffer massive villain decay and their power decreases."

"Well I haven't noticed the decrease very much. There was that time I saw her fighting the crazy girl connected to that black creature, but she held up pretty well just by herself."

"Well whatever man, I'll see you later." Sonya said as she walked off.

Sonic glanced over at Rose, who was still staring intensively at him, so he simply waved and quickly left as she did the same. Later on after signing up, they met Shadow, who agreed to join them for a short while but would leave if something suspicious came up. Sometime later, most of the seats in the audience were filled and the battlefields were set. In the commentators section, Cherry and the demon princess, Ivy, who turned up during the Halloween chapter, took their seats.

Cherry cleared her throat before speaking. "Good evening, ladies and gentlemen! Today we bring you the awesomeness that is a tournament, hosted by a sister of the Sue family, related to the supreme being herself, Mary Sue!"

Ivy continued. "Yes, someone who has gotten many names over the countless decades, such as That Girl with the Gameshark, Eternal Sunshine, and That Girl who most women would totally go gay for."

"I know I would." Cherry nodded.

"Wouldn't we all." Ivy nodded. "Anyway, since you filthy maggots are still listening to this crap, let's now inform everyone that these fights will have multiple people, and probably won't last very long, and Sally Sue will be waiting to crush most challengers if they can make it that far. Her power obviously pales in comparison to mine, but it's good enough."

"Ivy, you're being egotistical again." Cherry then yelled, "Unlike half the other stadiums, this one can change the battlefield of any area simply by flipping a switch and bringing out a new floorboard! Or whatever. But enough about us, let's start some of the matches, which may or may not be mean..."

As Rose watched from the same ledge near the entrance to the centre stage, Lily slowly walked towards her, saying, "How's it going, sis?"

Rose turned towards her and said, "So what are you doing here?"

"Geez? No hello or something? And you're normally so polite..."

"You're dodging the question."

"Oh, come one, Rose! You're as cold as ice! Are you willing to sacrifice our love?!" Rose just frowned at her, which Lily sighed at. "I'm here to watch some fights, is that good enough? Right now I don't feel like causing trouble, so I won't. Besides, we still have a little while before something significant actually happens."

"What do you mean by that?"

"It's a secret." She smirked. "Hey, remember that time we went shopping-"

"Yes." Rose quickly interrupted.

"And on the way there we got chased by a T-Rex on rollerskates and we had to run, so you gave me a piggy back ride, and you weren't going so fast, so to make you run faster, I started squeezing your ni-"

"I don't remember that." She replied.

"Really? Must have just been a dream then...man, today seems pretty short."

"Indeed it does."

"I wonder if CJ entered this, y'know, the guy kidnapping people with rope."

"You mean Candlejack?" Rose asked. "Why would he be here?"

"You're going to regret saying his name, y'know. He kidnaps people just for saying it."

"I find the notion just absurd and ridiculous. Why would someone go around kidnapping people for saying his name? How does he get around so quickly? And why are we talking about this? It don't make se
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« Reply #89 on: 08 May, 2010, 10:24:03 am »

Did you know, if I didn’t take a few weeks off recently, this would be finishing just before the summer holiday? At least where I’m at anyway. What a shame, huh?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Doomsday Saga: Chapter 72 – Serious Business

It was around 10 minutes after the matches had started taking place, and one had just finished as Cherry started talking. “That was a pretty decent match, huh, Ivy?”

She shrugged. “I thought it was lame. There weren’t enough decapitations.”

“This isn’t a fight to the death, Ivy...anyway, the match seems to be the Sonic Heroes vs. Members of the metallic council.”

“Possibly might be one of the few matches decent enough to watch.” Ivy commented.

“I hate that name.” Shadow said as the five of them walked onto the wastelands in the middle of the arena. “I can’t believe someone could come up with such a ridiculous name.”

“Just save your anger for the fight, Shadow.” Sonic replied. “You too, Knuckles.”

“I haven’t got anger issues.” He responded.

Just then, Metal Sonic, Mecha Sonic, Tails Doll, Mecha Knuckles and Eggrobo entered the wasteland stage from the other side of the arena. As Knuckles saw his robotic self, he shook his fist and yelled, “I’m gonna knock your head off!”

“I’m gonna feed you a metallic knuckle sandwich!” 

After a little while of arguing, they calmed down, at which point Sonic said, “So where’s the other guy?”

“You mean Metared? He’s in the audience.” Metal Sonic said, pointing to him as he got up.

The camera focusing on him from a low angle as he said, “Gentlemen! I need some snacks. I shall be back in a bit.” He then left his seat.

After a moment of silence, Metal Sonic took the opportunity to shoulder barge Sonic then tackle him through a rock replica. Mecha Sonic then spin attacked Shadow and took off after him. Knuckles and the metallic version of himself charged at each other and began hitting each other right there and then. Tails fired a laser cannon at Tails Doll who was hit and sent flying, with Tails following, while Amy ran off dodging Eggrobo’s rapid fire.

Sonic soon recovered from Metal’s assault and leaped over his next attack, spin attacked her and then quickly hit him with a roundhouse kick. Metal Sonic quickly recovered and charged at Sonic, smashing through a part of the terrain as Sonic leaped diagonally right. Sonic spin dashed at him, missing as he jumped, while he did the same, resulting in them destroying parts of the terrain and creating shockwaves where they clashed. Sonic soon missed by inches, at which point, Metal Sonic hit him with a spin dash, taking him round half a loop with the dash and then hitting him with a flying elbow.

Nearby, Shadow flipped onto a large rock and threw three chaos spears at Mecha higher above who dodged it and leaped across rocks attempting to stab Shadow who jumped. Mecha leaped back as Shadow pounded the ground, and then spin dashed towards him. Shadow hit him with a chaos blast, knocking him out of the cover, and then tripped him as he skated past. Mecha quickly spun into a ball and spin dashed backwards, quickly hitting Shadow, quickly uncurling and sending him flying with a midair kick. Shadow quickly teleported to the side of him using chaos control and punched him through several rocks.

Knuckles and Mecha Knuckles were still heavily engaged in their fistfight in the middle of the arena. Knuckles hit him in the face, followed by MK hitting him in the stomach. Knuckles hit him again in his torso, then tried to hit him across the face but missed, giving MK enough time to rapidly punch Knuckles in the stomach several times. As he winded a punch to knock Knuckles out, he ducked and hit MK with an uppercut.

Tails was in another area, firing continuously at Tails Doll who continued to vanish and reappear various times. He soon appeared in front of him and with a swipe launched several waves of darkness, which Tails leaped out of the way from. He moved at rapid speeds around the area, until he eventually found Tails and tackled him. “It’s time to feel the sunshine...” a glowing red aura began to resonate, and though Tails was unable to move him, he was still able to throw him behind him. Tails Doll landed on static trap, restricting his movement, which Tails had setup in various spots while running. Tails then aimed his laser cannon and prepared to fire all the energy he had been saving until this point. Tails Doll fired back, but could only hold it for a little while until the beam hit him, sending him flying out of the arena.

The crowd went wild as Tails looked around then ran off to help the others. Meanwhile, Amy had been running for a little while, as Eggrobo was shooting whenever something made a noise so she crept around silently. She threw a small stone towards an area nearby, and as Eggrobo quickly moved to check, she ambushed him from behind. Amy smacked the robot into the ground with her hammer, then continued to wail on Eggrobo until it looked like he was surrendering, then she hit him a few more times for good measure.

“Geez, what an idiot.” Ivy said from the commentators table. “What he did was plain stupid.”

“Yeah but its fun, right?” Cherry said.

“It’s not fun enough.” Ivy replied, shaking her head.

Back in the arena, Tails and Amy encountered Knuckles who had unleashed a 20-hit combo and punched out his mechanical counterpart. Nearby, Metal Sonic and Mecha Sonic were ganging up on Sonic, by knocking him back and forth around the area, until Tails hit Mecha Sonic with a laser beam from behind, followed by Knuckles and Amy rushing him.

Shadow nodded to Sonic as he got up, while Sonic did the same. As Metal Sonic lunged at Sonic, he jumped and charged up a light speed attack as Shadow did the same. They dashed through Metal from both sides, knocking him into the air. They then proceeded to diagonally cross paths multiple times, knocking him further into the air, until Sonic eventually dragged him down with a spin attack, resulting in them winning the match.

As the crowd cheered once more, Cherry turned to Ivy and said, “Wasn’t that exciting, Ivy?”

“Needed more blood.” She said with a shrug.

Nearby, the Loli Rangers ran into Lily walking down one of the corridors. Loli Red pointed to her and said, “Hey, aren’t you that one girl we met recently? What happened with the Fujin Gem? Can we have it now?”

Lily turned her head and said, “Well, you know how you’re watching a movie, about some girl who travels to a weird place, gets into a crash, tries to fix her car and encounters a whole bunch of freaky monsters sure to give you nightmares? And then you eventually discover the truth: The monsters aren’t real, that girl never survived the crash, and the movie has been a dying dream.” Lily leaned in so she was inches away from Loli Red’s face and whispered. “To get to the point, what I’m trying to say is, I was never misguided and had a change of heart, I’m still evil.” She promptly slapped Loli Red, knocking her to the ground as she yelled, “Bam! You just got Shyamalon’d! What a twist which isn’t really a twist!”

Loli Green suddenly started laughing and then quickly stopped and said, “I’m sorry, could we do that again?”

Moving further on, Sonic and the others discovered they would be fighting the Loli Rangers on a jungle map. While Tails quietly told Sonic about the five of them from analysis on their first match, the five of them waited patiently. 

“Okay, I’ll fight the leader.” Sonic finally said.

“And why do you get to fight the leader?” Knuckles asked.

“You don’t want me to fully answer that.”

As they continued to argue, Tsundere-chan attacked Sonic ahead of time, though Sonic was aware and spin dashed under her as she gave chase.

Loli Black waved at Knuckles before saying, “Hey, how about you and me have a little sparing match?”

“Fine by me.” Knuckles and Loli Black left.

“Hey miss, you wanna play?” Loli Blue asked, waving at Amy.

“Well okay, you seem like a nice person, so I’ll try not to hit you too hard.” Amy replied.

“Yaaaaay!” Loli Blue exclaimed as she tackled Amy.

Tails noticed Shadow and Loli Green had already left, then looked over at Loli Yellow who held up a board saying, “I shall be your opponent. Are you ready to fight?”

“I guess so. My name is Tails, nice to meet you.”

Loli Yellow stopped for a moment and crossed out what she had just written, and then held up a different sign. “My name is Dojikko-chan, I use boards to communicate because I don’t know English.”

“Couldn’t you just take one of those classes?”

She turned her board around. “But then I’d lose my gimmick.”

“Gimmick? But I was walking through the city one day when I saw you guys summon that giant robot, and you seemed to speak English just fine.”

Loli Yellow kept quiet for a few moments and then quickly wrote, “You know my secret; I have no choice but to kill you.” She started chasing him, attacking with her board as he ran.

Further away, Sonic had just spin dashed through Loli Red, knocking her to the ground. As he stopped and dashed back, Tsundere-chan hopped forward, spinning with her sword out, which Sonic evaded by inches by leaping right. Tsundere-chan landed on a rock, backflipped just over Sonic and tried to impale him. Sonic leaped back as she did so, she then propelled herself from the handle of the sword and fly kicked Sonic.

Nearby, Badass-chan was throwing several punches at Knuckles as she said, “Y’know, if you hit me, that means you’d be racist, and a complete **** for punching a little girl. That’s gotta suck, huh?”

“You’re not making this any easier.” Knuckles said just before their fists connected. Badass-chan moved back slightly, and then quickly charged forward as she punched him in the face, followed by several spinning kicks to the face and sending him flying with a knee. Sonic and Knuckles ran into each other shortly after this, and Knuckles was the first to say, “I’m guessing you’re having a little trouble too, huh?”

“Not that much. She just has surprisingly fast reaction time.” Sonic shrugged. Just then, Tsundere-chan and Badass-chan both showed up, glanced at each other, and then nodded as they attacked them. Tsundere-chan and Badass-chan took turns jabbing and swinging at them as they backed up until Sonic hit Badass-chan with a spin attack, shocking Tsundere-chan long enough for Knuckles to punch her. Tsundere-chan got up and fired a large red wave from her sword, which Sonic and Knuckles evaded by jumping out the way. The wave moved across the area and into the crowd, slicing some of the seats in half but avoided causalities.

At that moment, Ivy pumped her fist into the air and yelled, “Yeah! Go red-haired person! Cut someone in half!”

“You shouldn’t be encouraging her, Ivy...” Cherry replied.

As Sonic evaded more swings and hit her with a spin attack, Badass-chan managed to punch him and then was hit by an uppercut as Knuckles tunnelled underground. This continued for quite a while as Amy was chasing Yandere-chan, clearly furious and trying to whack her with her hammer as Yandere-chan threw knives and continued to laugh at her.

Soon enough, and due to somewhat limited time, Sonic’s team won, with Tsundere-chan and Badass-chan being defeated, Yandere-chan being hammered into the ground, Shadow knocking out Kuudere-chan the moment she finally made a move, and Dojikko-chan calming down and friendly talking with Tails instead of helping out.
 
Loli Red sighed as they lay on the ground. “Badass-chan, why do we lose almost every fight we have?”

“It’s probably because most of our opponents have broken powers, or are just slightly better.”

“That doesn’t make me feel any better...”

Cherry turned to Ivy after the match was over and said, “So, wasn’t that awesome, Ivy?”

She shrugged. “It sucked. It needed a lot more blood.”

Cherry’s expression suddenly changed and she glared at her as she said, “I’m worse off than you are right now, y’know? Having to put up with this act is tiring, and dull.”

“Then mellow out and be you, man.”

“I’ll try, Ivy, I’ll try...” She cleared her throat before yelling into her microphone. “So, now the first two rounds are over, we move onto the last round where Sally Sue will personally be challenging all teams one after the other, although only a few could make it this far anyway.” She said as Sally Sue waved from the front row.

“Not so fast!” They heard a familiar voice shout from above. Mary Sue and Purity Sue suddenly flew out of the sky and landed beside Sally as Mary said, “The rules have changed! Sally, Purity and I will be taking on all the teams together!” There was a mixed reaction throughout the arena: The viewers were anticipating such an event while most of the contestants were dreading it. “For those who believe they stand a chance of defeating all three of us in the same ring, the final matches will take place an hour from now, and there’ll be no rules, for both sides.”

Sonic and the others were leaving the arena as she finished and Sonic smiled, “So it’s all three of them now? This should be fun...”

“But Sonic, this is suicide!” Tails began. “We can’t beat all three of them at once!”

“I agree.” Knuckles responded. “We’ve already had a lot of trouble taking down Sally Sue by herself in the past, and that time we faced Mary Sue she could practically take all our attacks head-on with little effort.”

“We still don’t know what kind of abilities Purity Sue may pose.” Shadow added.

“I’ve heard Purity Sue never focused on fighting, so she’s not that strong.” Amy replied. “Though I once heard Mary say that her evasion speed is so high that even their parents have never laid a hand on her unless she wanted them to. I’m sure she’d be likely to surrender if we asked her nicely.”

“Our chances still aren’t very high.” Tails said as he used a calculator. “Our chances of winning against Sally at full strength was around 55%, but with Mary backing her up, it’s now down to -11%.”

“I don’t think percentages can go into the minuses, Tails.” Sonic pointed out.

“Actually it can, and sadly it did. Entering Mary Sue alone gave me a win percentage of 0%.”

“What about the chaos emeralds?” Amy suggested. “She said there were no rules, so that’s okay, right? I’m sure you could stand a chance against her as Super Sonic.”

Knuckles nodded. “Yeah! That’s a great idea. But how can we find all the emeralds in an hour?”

Tails took out a radar. “Well I conveniently created this radar to find the emeralds in such a situation.”

“You never slack off on the inventing, Tails.” Sonic said with a smirk. Sonic, Tails, Knuckles and Amy took off while Shadow decided to stay at the arena.
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