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ILS' topic of blog type thingies and stuff!

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Author Topic: ILS' topic of blog type thingies and stuff!  (Read 3264 times)
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« Reply #285 on: 24 January, 2010, 04:22:03 pm »

Hehehe. This should be interesting to see.
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« Reply #286 on: 24 January, 2010, 04:37:20 pm »

It should indeed. After writing the introductions and stuff, I was too tired to make an effort to write about the individual characters in the "written let's play", though I do intend to try to do it more.



I also forgot one game mechanic: F.O.E monsters. Basically, they're mini-boss mobs. They aren't random, but show up on your map. They can move in set patterns, or chase you down. Needless to say, you want to avoid them. A lot. They're epically strong, often capable of one hit KO-ing your party members. You can return later when you've level'd up and kick their ass though. Very satisfying. In EOII, they give no XP, so there's no reason to fight them, except for the things they drop (which you use to create better weapons/armor). I don't know what F.O.E really stands for, but the fanbase has many names for them. The most common being "**** Overpowered Enemy". The fearful enemy the group encountered (which is pretty much a t-rex by the way, trust me, I was destroyed by it the first time) is indeed an F.O.E. They'll kill him, but it won't be until a few floors later.
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« Reply #287 on: 26 January, 2010, 07:24:14 am »

F***ing Overpowered Enemy sounds like a good nickname. Although being my second favorite genre, I tend to suck at half the RPG's I play unless I know fully what I'm doing or if I grind the hell out of it (For me, Disgaea required both, but mainly the latter).
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« Reply #288 on: 26 January, 2010, 10:04:10 am »

Yeah. Another often used nickname is **** On Encounter. I always suck at RPG's at first, but once I get the hang of the mechanics, I can do okay without too much grinding. I only grind because it's awesome to easily kill the giant dragon with lots of HP.

Another note: The bad thing about the F.O.E isn't just it's strength, but the fact that it can not only join random battles, and even boss battles, but that it just seems to appear out of nowhere. You'll be going around a corner, and whoops! F.O.E! And there's a million of them. On the third floor of the second game, you're pitted against, I am not kidding, 10-15 of them, all of them capable of demolishing you if you don't manage to escape. It's a cruel and brutal trick. I even got tricked into going into a room for a treasure chest, only to get jumped by an F.O.E that killed a character per turn. But I'll get to taht soon...

On the subject of F.O.E:

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« Reply #289 on: 26 January, 2010, 11:06:25 am »

One of the reasons I grinded like hell while playing Disgaea 3 was so I could speed through the rest of the story with a few overpowered characters and OHKO the final boss (which I managed to do with Mao when I got to him on Christmas day). I'd assume F.O.E's are tied to Goddamned Bats.
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« Reply #290 on: 25 February, 2010, 06:38:09 am »

So, new rant. I should call the topic ILS' topic of rant type thingies <_<

So, this rant is about the IMO fan-dumb that surrounds the Metroid franchise. Observe:

As most Metroid fans know, a new game is in development, called Metroid: Other M. This game is being developed in collaboration with Team Ninja, famous for among other things obviously, having each and every female character be quite.... busty. And almost naked. And some would say slutty looking. The obvious outcry from the fans is: "Team Ninja will give Samus bigger boobs and make her a sex symbol!!!". Recent new screenshots showing Samus' bust seems to prove their theory that she's got big breasts now. Or it would, if it wasn't for one little, tiny, detail.

Samus has always had big breasts. And she's always been a sex symbol.

Now, I've got two theories as to why fans believe her breasts are new and enlarged. One, they suck at Metroid games. Which is fair, not everyone is great at every type of game. Two, they're just insanely dumb. Lets look at the breast argument first.

Samus has always had big breasts, fact. That's just how it is. Don't believe me? Go play Metroid Zero Mission. Now beat the game. Look at the ending screenshot. Now go through the game again, and do better and look at the screenshot. Too lazy? Look no further. Now take one, good, long look at those pictures. Can you tell me in which of those pictures Samus is flat chested? That's right, none of them. Those are from a Nintendo made Metroid game, which means those pictures are canon. Samus has always had big breasts, Team Ninja didn't implement them. Stop whining and get your facts right. Just for good measure, here is Zero Suit Samus from Brawl. Pay attention to her chest area. I rest my boobs case.

As for Samus being a sex symbol.... lets not kid ourselves. She's always been a sex symbol. Again, we need look no further than the endings to the Metroid games. How are gamers rewarded for doing good? The better you do,

Sorry for all the links, they just lead to the different endings. For proofz.

The only one that DOESN'T follow this trend is the Metroid Prime ending, in which she only takes off her helmet. Every other game has her either strip, or pose. Granted, compared to other sex symbols it might not be that bad, but she's a sex symbol none the less.


Even IF Team Ninja somehow increased her breast size, even IF they made her a bigger sex symbol than now... This is a Nintendo game, with a fan loved franchise. Nintendo would never let Team Ninja get away with something like that, unless it was part of the character. That, and she'll probably be inside her power suit for 90% of the game, so we won't get to see anything.

No, the fans should just stop whining, or call the waaaaaaambulance. Samus has always had big boobs and been sexy. Get over it.

It will only have become too much, the day a metroid attaches itself to Samus' breast and begins sucking. Which will never ever ha-

http://eriance.deviantart.com/art/Samus-Metroid-Love-67648760

Oh.

Well, **** me.
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« Reply #291 on: 25 February, 2010, 06:52:05 am »

I thought this one was lame tbh.
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« Reply #292 on: 25 February, 2010, 09:32:03 am »

Lulz.
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« Reply #293 on: 25 February, 2010, 05:09:36 pm »

Meh, didn't expect much from it myself... Not much to say when you're right...
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« Reply #294 on: 26 February, 2010, 12:20:27 am »

Or when you misinterpret the opposing viewpoint, yup
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« Reply #295 on: 27 February, 2010, 04:52:02 am »

Her breasts really aren't that big to be honest anyway, even in SSBB, it's just what she wears that outline 'em.
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« Reply #296 on: 22 April, 2010, 03:55:44 pm »

March 19th - 1991 up to April 22nd - 2010

So, instead of typing out a blog entry of something that happened today, or a few days ago, Iíll instead do a blog about my life as a gamer. 15 years ago.

Weíre **** traveling across time here.

I apologize in advance, as this blog post might not be that funny. Of course, you could argue that Iím NEVER funny, in which case Iíll employ the deadliest of interwebz insults, second only to yo momma: NO U. But seriously, this is gonna be more of a trip down memory lane as I reminiscence about my time as a gamer during my younger years. So yeah, if that stuff bores you, you probably shouldnít read on. Weíll start where my life as a gamer began: Around 1995.

The earliest memory that I have, is ironically one of video game-ian nature. The earliest memory I have, is of me, my dad and my mom playing on the old Commodore 64, back when I was around 3-4 years old. This **** was ****, it had 64kb of ram. Thatís 64 thousand. If thatís not ****, I donít know WHAT is. Anyway, thatís the earliest memory I have. After digging through my memory and a list of Commodore 64 games on Wikipedia, I finally discovered what game I always played with my mom and dad. That game, was cliffhanger.


No, not that cliffhanger. THIS cliffhanger:


Hell. Yes. Itís like Wile E. Coyote and Road Runner, onlyÖ a lot more pixilated, and ****. But itís the first game I played, albeit rarely. I only played it when my mom and dad wanted to play it with me, and even then it was mostly just for laughs when we failed over and over. I didnít care that I sucked balls at the game, I was having fun with my mom and my dad, and thatís all I really cared about. I never played any other Commodore 64 games, only cliffhanger. I donít remember much more from that year, but the NEXT year is where things get interesting.

In the winter of 1996, me, my mom and my dad were in the US. More specifically, we were on our way HOME from the US. We were stuck in New York airport, unable to get on a plane. I was horribly bored (we ended up waiting for 11 hours), and my mom and dad could see that. It was at that moment, that they gave bought me a gift that would spark my interest in my deepest, most beloved hobby.

They gave me a giant **** brick.
http://www.ratteswg.de/Uber_mich/Hobbies/Nintendo/Gameboy.jpg

Seriously, to a little 5 year old like me, the thing was MASSIVE. But I was amazed anyway. It was like the Commodore back at home, except I could play it anywhere I wanted, and it even had better graphics! I was ecstatic. What was the first game I ever truly owned, and played on the gameboy you asked? Oh, just KILLER **** INSTINCT. Nevermind that I sucked horribly at it, nevermind that I had no idea what was going on, nevermind that I didnít even know what a fighting game was, it was a blast. I loved every single minute of it. Things only got worse once I got Donkey Kong for the gameboy, which to this day remains one of the games that I have played the most.  I must have completed that game over 20 times, and spent more hours on it than I ever have on RPG games. It was also the game that caused my first nerd rage incident. I got pissed at that giant **** Donkey Kong final boss, so much so that I headbutted the screen hard enough for it to break.

I was very pissed.

Anyway, Iíve pretty much upgraded to every new iteration of the Nintendo handhelds ever since then, and theyíve always had a special place in my heart. My first console, however, was the good old Super Nintendo Entertainment System. Now, I wish I could remember exact details on how I got it, but I sort of remember the first game I played on it. The choice is between two games: It was either Jungle Book, based on the Disney movie, or Alladin, based on theÖ Disney movie....

Huh.

Anyway, this was really amazing to me. Even better graphics, a separate controller, and TONS of games. The SNES is probably my favorite console ever, and the one I played the most. Many good times were had with the SNES. Thereís not that much to say about this era of my life, and from here on, we get into the more ďrecentĒ consoles, like the N64, PS1, etc. so I wonít go into more detail.

ďBUT WAITĒ you say, ďWHERE IS THE SEGA LOVE? HOW CAN YOU LIKE SONIC IF YOU NEVER PLAYED SONICĒ. To that Iíll say, press your god damn caps key. Even with cruise control you have to **** steer. Anyway, the reason there is no Megadrive description is becauseÖ. Well, I never had one. Every megadrive game Iíve ever played, I played at a friendís house, or Iíve emulated later in life. Same thing with NES games. And surprisingly, I never had a PS1 either. I only got into Sony during its PS2 era, where I also played most of the PS1 games that I happened to miss. When I finally got the money to buy a PS3, I was going to play my PS2 games on it in honor of my dead PS2, but Sony is a bunch of dicktwaddlers who removed backwards compatibility. They should just go climb a wall of dicks. But thatís a rant for another timeÖ

Anyway, that is essentially my journey through gaming. The older I got, the more into gaming I became, and the more consoles I saved up for at a time. It all started with the Commodore 64 and the Gameboy, ever since then, Iíve been in love with gaming. Itís an escapism that allows me to be a great hero or a badass anti hero, or even a villain in some cases. Iím able to do what I canít do in real life, able to get out aggressions instead of taking them out on people in real life. Most of my knowledge, Iíve gained from video games. Hell, if it wasnít for Pokemon Blue, I might not be typing this post right now, as it might not have been so interested in learning how to speak English. One thing is for sure though. I am a gamer, and until the day I die, I will probably remain to be so.

Ö..What? You still here? UrghÖ. Fine. Iíll end on a horrible joke.

Why did the condom leave so suddenly? Because it got pissed off.

There. The quality just dropped 80 notches, I hope youíre happy. Now, if youíll excuse me, Iíll need to go clean my nostalgia tainted glasses.
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« Reply #297 on: 22 April, 2010, 04:15:37 pm »

Ahh, Donkey Kong, holy **** was that game hard, especially once you reached the desert map. I'm still not sure how I finished that game. I gotta see if TV Tropes has a page on that game...

Also, wat? No Genesis?!? What is this I don't even...
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« Reply #298 on: 22 April, 2010, 04:37:30 pm »

lol, you're funny mads
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« Reply #299 on: 22 April, 2010, 04:46:15 pm »

Yeah, some of those puzzles got stupidly difficult in the later levels... And yeah, no Genesis. I don't think I even knew it existed <_<


And thank you Rachel.
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