Message #847471

[Gaffit]

Bruce Lee vs. The Predator



Round 1 Day 1:

In a massive Predator training arena within an ancient Aztec temple, Bruce Lee and the Predator meet face-to-face. The chamber is filled with massive bits of fallen debris and huge spiked columns fill the room. Bruce bows before the Predator.

“May we fight with the honor becoming of warrior like ourselves,” Lee suggests.

The Predator gives a slight nod, understanding the jist of the message.

Bruce Lee draws his bow staff and charges the Predator head on. The Predator pulls out its Combi Stick, extending it to its full size. Lee flings himself into the air and brings his staff down on the alien, who blocks the strike with his spear, surprised at the strength of the attack.

Lee doesn’t give the Predator another second and follows up his blow with another aimed at the Creature’s equivalent to a kidney. The Predator catches the staff mid-swipe and shatters it with his powerful elbow. The creature follows up by aiming another swipe at Bruce who rolls a good distance away before launching himself into the air and delivering a powerful kick to the Predator’s chest, causing it to stumble backwards.

The creature quickly recovers from the blow and sends a massive swipe of his spear into Lee’s leg, causing him to tumble to the ground. The Predator then wedges his spear between Lee and the floor, flicking it upward and launching Lee all the way to the other side of the arena.

Lee painfully gets to his feet and looks across the room to see the creature’s shoulder-mounted plasma caster lock on to him. Lee throws himself behind a piece of collapsed roof just as the spot he was standing in is destroyed in a violent explosion.

The Predator walked over to the site of the eruption assuming his opponent to be dead and looking for anything to use as a trophy when a sharp pain shot up his leg. Looking down, the Predator saw an arrow penetrating its hamstring. Sending out a roar of pain, the Predator angrily wrenched the arrow free and lurched at the spot Lee was hiding. Grabbing the surprised Lee by the head, the massive creature hurled him across the room and painfully into a wall.

Lee hit the wall hard, toppling to the floor on top of some sort of switch. A strange clicking sound suddenly filled the arena. Lee saw the Predator glance around in what appeared to be concern. Obviously he had just done something very bad.

The wall in front of the Predator blew inward as the army of Xenomorphs used for young Predator training was released. The Predator shot an angry glance at Lee before cackling lightly and activating his cloak.

Quickly drawing his bow, Lee faced the swarm of incoming aliens, hitting many of them in the head right above the mouth, causing them to screech an unearthly scream before tumbling to the ground; the spray of their blood causing the floor of the arena to melt. Another seventeen of the aliens fell before finally running out of arrows, but the army was still coming unhindered. Lee drew his katana in preparation.

The Predator activated the laser mines he placed at the entrance of the chamber, causing any of the aliens entering to be turned into piles of acidic meat. The Predator then unsheathed his retractable shuriken and set about finishing off the remaining Xenomorph left in the room. On the other side of the arena, the Predator spotted his human opponent surprisingly holding his own against the aliens, though his blade was already starting to melt.

A Xenomorph pounced on the Predator from behind, causing him to collapse onto the acid covered floor. The alien began flailing wildly at the Predator, damaging his plasma caster; the creature was ready to finish the Predator off when the creature’s head split in half down the middle, the spray of blood spattering onto his chest, causing his flesh to burn.

Lee threw down what was left of the melting hilt that was once his sword next to his opponent and waited for the Predator to get to his feet. Nodding at Lee, the creature drew its Combi Stick and tossed it at Lee’s feet while retracting its own massive Wrist Blades. Lee nodded back and picked up the Combi Stick in time to block the oncoming swipe from the Predator. Lee stabbed the spear into the ground and vaulted over his opponent, slicing him across the back as the Predator sent the back of his wrist blades into Lee’s arm.

Bruce quickly did an about-face and sent a finishing blow into the creature’s neck, but the Predator caught the spear between his claws and twisted its forearm, wrenching the spear from Lee’s hand as the Predator sent a powerful punch into Lee with his other arm.

Lee was sent hurtling through the air, catching himself painfully on a spike pillar, he bounced himself back towards the Predator, whose defenses were wide open. Bruce Lee channeled his energy into his fist and sent the Fist of Fury cleanly into the creature’s chest, whose burnt flesh allowed the fist to penetrate through, as Lee literally punched the now-exposed heart of the Predator.

The Predator shuddered once before it fell to his knees and slumped to the ground. Lee gave the beast a single respectful bow before turning to leave.