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The Something Something Demonic Something Ever

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« Reply #240 on: 14 July, 2010, 01:18:48 pm »

what is this I don't even
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« Reply #241 on: 14 July, 2010, 01:19:07 pm »

Settle down, buttmunch.
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« Reply #242 on: 14 July, 2010, 01:20:40 pm »

*bursts out of taxi*

REEEEEEEEEEEEEMMIIIIIIIIXXXXXXXXXXX



*bobs head to beat* *MM's Hood comes out of nowhere and jumps Spring* *pops bottles and drinks to beat*
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« Reply #243 on: 14 July, 2010, 01:21:22 pm »

Don't worry, pharaohman, it's going to be painless for us.
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« Reply #244 on: 14 July, 2010, 01:24:03 pm »

*WALKS STRAIGHT THROUGH WHATEVER MM WAS TALKING ABOUT*

AMERICA SON

*OBAMA APPEARS TO TAKE MM HOME*

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« Reply #245 on: 14 July, 2010, 01:27:45 pm »



*dons sunglasses*

*smiles and implodes*

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« Reply #246 on: 14 July, 2010, 01:33:26 pm »

*manly tears*
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« Reply #247 on: 14 July, 2010, 01:37:28 pm »

More like mainly teared apart
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« Reply #248 on: 14 July, 2010, 01:59:24 pm »

More like mainly teared apart

:I
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« Reply #249 on: 14 July, 2010, 02:03:04 pm »

Yeeeaaaahhhh???
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« Reply #250 on: 17 July, 2010, 08:34:44 am »

So Imma do it, with teh list.

31. Lets Get Magical (Ruby becomes a Magical Girl super heroine)
32. Crisis on Several Earths (Gary travels to several different alternate realities; relation to previous chapter)
33. A Vamp and her Cat (Rosie befriends a talking cat from another universe; also relation)
34. A Lighter Shade of Evil (Damien helps Lolita catch undead souls)
35. Cosmic Destination (Does it need an explanation?)
36. Night of the Savvy Tropers (TV Tropes spoof as a result of a zombie invasion)
37. The Hellish Hammerspace Massacre (Lolita tracks Ivy and gang to Hell to kill them with dozens of different weapons)
38. Convention of Supernatural Beings (Umm, yeah)
39. Two Sides to Every Story, Part 1
40. Two Sides to Every Story, Part 2

I might rearrange one or two eventually.
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« Reply #251 on: 17 July, 2010, 08:37:49 am »

TMEDCE: Chapter 31 - Lets Get Magical

In the middle of night, Ruby was running along the rooftops on Earth in a completely black version of her superhero outfit, with a black skirt, cape, mask and even black hair as she started to monologue. “Earth, its always there for me, even when its mood changes, its always there. She is my cousin…she is my heterosexual life partner. I try to protect it because I’m one of the people willing to do so; to take the law into my own hands by force.” She stopped by a building ledge and looked down to see crooks breaking into the museum of randomness. She leaped off the edge and prepared to strike.

Inside they had tied up some security guards and were taking several items, them being a long string shaped like a burger, a can of spam, and a cardboard box. Ruby leaped in through the glass window, alerting the crooks as she slowly got to her feet. “I am the bane of the evil that overshadows the streets, I am the steel bars which keep the criminals locked up, I am Justice!” With a swing of her cape, it bellowed slightly. They immediately fired, which Ruby dodged by jumping up and landing between them, swinging her spear in a circle as she hit the ground and tripping them up then smashing their guns. She slapped a gun out of another thug’s hand and punched him in the stomach then leaped towards another who was stealing a piece of chewing gum.

She kicked him, sending him flying ahead and to the ground, where another thug grabbed the gum before running. Ruby quickly untied the guards near the entrance and took off, jumping onto her pink bike down the next two streets and quickly caught up with the robbers van. She passed by Ivy, Poison and Amber as they sat in DFC by the window, shortly before Poison asked, “I wonder what Ruby is doing right now?”

“Forget her, she’s probably doing something stupid.” Ivy replied.

“Most likely.” He shrugged.

After a while of chasing the van, one robber opened the back and threw barrels at her; she evaded a few while blasting some which contained milk. It splattered all over her, some of it getting in her eyes and nearly making her crash into a garbage truck which she barely avoided, but it then backed up and hit her anyway. Sadly after cleaning herself off the robbers were long gone, so she also went home.

The next morning, she was walking around her room in her pyjamas as she talked about her encounter. “It just doesn’t make sense, why would they want those items? I’ve got many enemies nowadays, like the Memetic Molester, Adol, the Totally Radical Masterman, the physical embodiment of Nightmare Fuel simply known as Willard, and my arch nemesis and Evil Counterpart, Ivy McBadass. I should visit her now and get this sorted out.”

So she did, and left to visit her home on Earth, which she occasionally went back to live there sometimes, and approached the window as she arrived. “I may have to sneak inside to get evidence, so I’ll have to be stealthy.” she said moments before jumping in through the glass window, alerting them who were sitting by the couch. Ruby pointed at her and yelled, “You! Why did you steal those things last night?! It was you, wasn’t it?!?”

“No, you foolish angel, I haven’t done anything this time, so don’t blame me for no reason.” Ivy replied. “Nor do I know anything about it.”

“Oh, well okay…and hi Poison.”

“Hey Ruby.“ Poison then said, “Did you know Pirates vs. Ninjas in Space is coming on tonight at 6?”

“Really? I loved that one, though it couldn’t hold a candle to 3.”

“Indeed it couldn’t.” He nodded. “But I’m probably gonna have to go watch it somewhere else because Ivy wants the TV to watch her shows.”

“That’s right.” She nodded.

“Well why don’t you come round my house and we can watch it there.” Ruby suggested.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea, I’d hate in intrude, plus I doubt Ivy would be okay with it.”

“I don’t mind.” Ivy shrugged.

“It still wouldn’t feel right.”

“I think my mom bought some pizzas earlier.” Ruby said.

“I’ll be round at 5.” Poison said without hesitation.

“Okay, see you then.” Ruby said as she ran off.

There was a period of silence after she had left, and then Ivy randomly said, “Sounds like the plot of a doujin.”

“You just had to say that, didn’t you?” Poison replied, narrowing his eyes at her.

“I assume you noticed it too.”

Soon after leaving she received a call about a robbery taking place at a laboratory and rushed to the scene as she got her superhero outfit on, where she discovered Omar stealing some of the equipment with his thugs. Ruby pointed at him and yelled, “Omar! It was you all along!”

“But of course! There are marvellous things I hope to achieve in stealing other scientists equipment for my own, since a genius such as I cannot spend the time to get it through proper means.”

“Whatever, I’m bringing you in, Omar.”

“I can’t let you do that, Star Fox!” With a snap of his fingers, a dozen mooks appeared. “Dempsey roll that sucka!” He yelled as he ran off. As Ruby tried to chase him, the robbers fried, forcing her to hide behind tables and various objects, firing psychic waves occasionally and then easily taking out the rest after half of them were knocked out. Sadly Omar had gotten away once more, so she had no choice but to leave and go home.

Later that day, Poison visited and knocked at the door of her house, and her mom greeted him. “Oh, good afternoon Poison, what brings you here?”

“Good afternoon Mrs. Clear, I was invited to watch that Pirate and Ninja movie. Is Ruby here?”

“She’s upstairs, come on in.”

Meanwhile in her room, she was talking with Crystal about Omar and where she could find him. “So you have any ideas?”

“Nope, it just seems weird. There isn’t much to go on, though there’s probably only one crucial detail you’d need for it to make sense.”

“I guess, but do I still keep having to dye my hair black every time I fight crime? Is it really necessary?”

“Of course it is!”

“But you already told me to make my whole costume black, and even my ship, but dyeing my hair every time I change is quite a hassle.”

“Well its essential to keeping your identity a secret.” 

“True, no-one would suspect a cute cheerful little girl like me would be a badass asskicker who soars through the skies punches evil in the face.”

“Well there aren’t many little girls with the strength and skill of that level to be honest, but I’m just saying.”

Just then Poison walked in and waved to them as he said, “Hey guys.”

“Hey Poison, so how’s life?” Crystal asked.

“Its alright, same as usual.”

“Cool, well I’ll see you guys later.” She said moments before leaving the room.

In order to reduce the amount of awkward silence that would follow, Ruby turned on the TV. “So Crystal said that I’ve gotten quite good at felletio recently.” Ruby randomly said.

Poison blinked for a moment. “…What?”

“Y’know, the thing where you change the tone of your voice, like how deep it is?”

“You mean falsetto. And where are you hearing these words?” Just then, as one advert came on, Poison randomly said, “Y’know, who would wanna buy random crap like the kind they advertise nowadays?”

Ruby suddenly got to her feet as she realized something. “That’s it! Poison, I’ll be back later, I just have to figure something out.” She rushed out the room, leaving him somewhat confused.

She went to meet Gary at his house and they walked as Ruby explained everything to him and then asked where a mad scientist would hide out in the meantime. “Well?”

“Maybe some area very high off the ground, like one of those castles you see in movies at the top of a dark cliff. It wouldn’t be surprising at least.” Gary replied.

“Yeah, that makes sense.”

“So do you really know what’s up with Omar then?”

“Yes, just earlier I made the connections. He stole a burger string, a can of spam, a cardboard box and chewing gum, but what would those items have in common?”

Gary thought for a second. “Nothing really, they’re quite random.”

“Exactly, and I last caught him stealing scientific equipment in another lab, which only comes to one conclusion: He’s using those random items to open up a portal leading to the world of random junk using a dimensional portal, and knowing Omar, this can’t be good! I have to stop him immediately, lets go!”

“But shouldn’t we tell your sister or people we know first?”

“We have no time!”

“But it would be easier if we just asked them.”

“But then I wouldn’t be able to look awesome! I wanna be badass adorable!” Ruby said in a whiny voice as she frowned.

“So that’s what this is about…anyway, its dangerous to confront Omar at his hideout. He’s got guards and his robots and everything, you’ll be in his territory. Even if you think you’re a magical girl, we don’t really have magic.”

“Well then,” She put on her mask. “Lets. Get. Ridiculous.

“I never said ridiculous.”

“Whatever.” Ruby replied just before they jumped in her ship and took off.

They soon flew around Earth and just as Gary had suggested, they managed to find a tower by a cliff where Omar was but remained unseen and parked around the back. Ruby handed him a walkie-talkie and flew up the wall, jumping though an open window higher up. She ran around the dark corridors and somewhat empty rooms, hiding from guards every few moments until one spotted her and opened fire. She blasted it out of his hand and punched him out, continuing to move around in the shadows and taking out guards at every opportunity. Gary contacted her as she was hid behind a table with a bullet wound in her arm. “How’re things going in there?”

“Its just crazy, there’s bad guys around every corner, some coming out of elevators, some coming out from beneath the floor.” She then punched one mook who did so. “But I got this. Its on now!” She put on her serious face as she put away the walkie-talkie. [Insert epic action packed theme with ominous latin chanting here]

She grabbed a table and leaped over her own, throwing it and taking out two guards, then pinning a third to the wall as she threw her spear, then leaping up and hitting the last with a roundhouse kick. She ran down a hallway with more mooks firing at her and threw a holy hand grenade as she yelled, “Eat grenade, assholes!” The explosion took them out, just as she reached a massive room of robotic dinosaurs. She ran up the tail of a Brachiosaurus and dodged the lasers it fired, hitting it with a flying elbow and taking it out. She jumped onto a Triceratops as it charged at her and smashed through several smaller dinosaurs before throwing it at the wall. She then leaped onto a Pterosaur as it flew at her and punched it several times while controlling its flight to avoid the T-Rex chasing them. It smashed into the wall as Ruby leaped into another room, destroying the T-Rex with a magic staff that fired lasers.

She met a robot wielding two sub machines guns, hitting her leg as she hid. Using her psychokinesis she lifted several tables into the air and jumped across them, turning them slightly for cover then fly kicked the robot, followed by kicking one gun out of his hands and then an uppercut. She barrel rolled to find cover as the robot recovered and threw a smoke bomb at him. More psychic blasts followed, which the robot evaded by leaping back, right beside Ruby who had a gun pointed at his head. “Should’ve done a barrel roll, fucker!” She then blasted his head off.

She moved on, running from explosions caused by mooks and moving through air vents. After taking out another room of mooks, she fly kicked the last one, dragging him along the ground with the kick then leaped off as he headed for the open lift. She threw a holy hand grenade while jumping off followed by a Hello Kitty boomerang which pressed the first floor button on the lift. As she touched the ground, she exclaimed, “Yippee-ki-yay, motherfucker!” as the doors were closing, resulting in a large explosion as she walked away, her cape bellowing from the blast.

She made it to a giant room with computers at all sides and the dimensional gate in the middle, but Omar had already started the process by hooking up the items with the gate. Omar dropped down in a large rock ‘em sock ‘em robot and yelled, “You’re too late! I’ve won! I‘m winner!”

“Its not over as long as I’m still standing.” She took out the gun again. “Eat gas, nutjob!” She fired a smoke bomb and went for the controls, but was kicked out of the way and continuously punched. Gary snuck in while this happened and attempted to stop the gate, but was somewhat distracted as flying pink elephants with moustaches came through and fired lasers at him.

Omar was somewhat distracted, at which point the control box was destroyed and things were being sucked back into the portal. Gary grabbed a remote as he flew in and Ruby leapt to her feet to fight Omar. She flew at him dodging the laser beams fired, touched the fist he threw with her feet and leaped ahead, then ran along the lower side of the second hand’s arm. She charged her right arm with psychokinetic power and hit the upper torso of the robot with a left uppercut, then hit the head with her right, with enough force to knock the head through the roof and make it explode in midair.

A bit later, the police arrived to take the robbers into custody, and one spoke to Ruby as Omar was being cuffed and escorted out. “Another job well done, Justice. I still have no idea how you do it for someone your size.”

“Its heroic resolve, officer, and badassery.” Ruby leaped out the window and got back in her ship, heading back towards home.

As she got back to her room, Poison waved. “Hey Ruby, you got back just in time. The movie’s about to start.”

“Thank goodness.” She said with a sigh of relief before sitting down.

“Where did you go? And are those bullet wounds?”

“Its not important, just bad luck as usual. I’m just wondering if I forgot something…” She thought for a moment and then shrugged.
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« Reply #252 on: 17 July, 2010, 10:46:30 am »

Second Barrage?
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« Reply #253 on: 17 July, 2010, 12:29:04 pm »

I'm not sure.
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« Reply #254 on: 24 July, 2010, 11:13:18 am »

TMEDCE: Chapter 32 - Crisis on Several Earths

You unlock this door with a remote of insanity, beyond it is a number of other dimensions. Dimensions of craziness, dimensions of surreal events, dimensions of ridiculous plot points. You’re moving into a land and both randomness and junk, of silliness and bizarreness. You’ve just crossed into, The Random Zone.

Upon waking up on the ground, Gary realized the earth and all the buildings were covered in white and grey stripes, and the sun was completely black. As he glanced around the area, suddenly giant deformed babies crashed through several buildings, flying right at him. He quickly took off as they fired tentacles from their mouths, running around several buildings before pulling out the remote he had grabbed earlier and pressing a button. A portal opened up just ahead and he leaped into it; the portal closing a moment later.

He was dropped off in a medieval looking era in the middle of a field. He looked around and spotted a cabin far up ahead, sighing as he made a move towards the place. He entered the cabin which was also a bar where Lily was running the place. He approached her, immediately asking, “This may sound weird but where am I exactly?”

“You’re in Camelot…I think. You’re a knight, right? Because you have a shining sword, and that white cape, and-”

“Uhh, no, I’m not from here, I just wanna get back to my own dimension.”

“Ahh, well you should probably try to leave pretty soon. I gotta pay taxes and you never know wh-”

Just then, Poison, Damien and Adol walked into the bar, in full white armour with Damien ahead of the others exclaiming, “Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition!”

“I did.” Lily raised her hand.

“Quiet you!” Ivy said as she came out from behind the three, wearing a pink dress. “Its time to pay up for existing!”

“Of course.” Lily placed a bag of money on the table. “Please take it, princess.”

“And who’s this nobody?” Ivy asked as she took the bag.

“Huh, I guess here you’re still as rude and also a kid.” Gary remarked.

Ivy backed away slightly, filled with disbelief. “How dare you! I’ll have you know I’m just a little short!”

“And with no chest.” Poison added.

“Quiet you!”

“I challenge you to a duel, sir knight.” Adol said.

“Uh-huh.” Gary said, clearly not going along with this. “Excuse me a moment.” Gary walked into the men’s room and used the remote to leave that universe.

Gary emerged from another portal moments later, in the middle of a park where there was confetti sprinkled throughout the sky, birds sang and everyone was smiling. Gary scratched his forehead. “I guess this universe mustn’t be so bad…” As he turned around he bumped into Masterman, who was missing his cap, revealing his flowing green hair, he still had shades, but also had the colours of the rainbow across his shirt and pants.

“Whoa! What’s your hurry, man?” Masterman asked.

“Aren’t you that Masterman guy?”

“Nah, I’m Hippieman, man. You look tense, you should chill out. Just look around, its peaceful here. You‘re either friendly, or you‘re high, sometimes both.”

“Yeah, I guess so.” Gary replied. He then noticed Ruby skipping along with a picnic basket, when Ivy suddenly called her as she yelled, “Ruby, you silly angel, come here and give me a hug!”

“Ivy, my rival but also my lover.” Ruby cheerfully skipped over to her, they hugged and then started kissing.

“I’m not sure what to think of this.” Gary said as he simply watched from afar.

Suddenly Poison showed up on a bike, greeting them as he said good morning. They replied back in unison and the three of them started making out. Gary still stood in silence as it went on.

“Good morning, guys.” Damien said as randomly approached them.

“Good morning, Damien.” They all said in unison. They all then started kissing, and then he used tongue when he kissed Ivy.

“…I stand corrected, this universe is more messed up than my own.” Gary quickly grabbed a barf bag just in case.

At that point, Spring, Floyd and Willard arrived holding hands. “Hey guys, lets all join hands and sing!” Spring suggested.

“Great idea, guys!” Ivy replied.

Lolita, upon hopping out of the bushes, exclaimed, “We should sing ring around the rosy!”

“Yeah!” Rosie replied, who had suddenly appeared.

Just then, Gary arrived, greeting them all. Poison suddenly hugged him, saying, “Thank goodness, Gary. I was so worried you weren’t well today.”

“I overcame my sickness just for you, Poison.” The two of them then started passionately kissing, causing the original Gary to start vomiting. Moments later the other Gary was down on his knees undoing Poison’s pants.

The original took out his remote, saying, “That’s it! This place is sick! I’m out of here!” He immediately jumped in as Masterman waved goodbye.

The next universe he arrived in, everyone was wearing leather jackets, a pair of shades and baggy pants as they walked down the streets. Gary immediately bumped into Masterman, who said, “Watch where you’re going, dude. I don’t need haters sweating on a brother.”

“Oh, its you again.” Gary said, clearly annoyed. “Where am I now?”

“You’re in the hood, man.”

“But it looks like a normal city…” He then noticed everyone had similar clothing on. “Oh, I already dislike this one.”

With a cry of, “Duuuuuuude!” Poison appeared, wearing a backwards hat and shades as he did. “What’s happening, bro?”

“Poison, my boy! Just chilling, you know how it is.” Masterman replied.

“Like, dude, I just saw Transformers 2 for like the 7th time, man.”

“That’s awesome, dude!”

Gary’s eyes widened in fear as he said, “Oh god, there’s two of them!”

“Yo, yo, yo!” To his surprise, Ivy and Ruby approached the three from behind wearing the same attire.

Gary couldn‘t believe his eyes. “Even you guys too?”

“Who’s this fool who be tripping?” Ivy asked.

“I oughta cap this fool right now.” Ruby said as she pulled out a gun, though Masterman clamed her down.

“Umm, I’m gonna go now…” Gary quickly pulled out his remote and jumped into another portal, with Ivy pointing as she said, “YOOOOOOUUUUU!”

Poison took a phone and called Floyd as this happened. “Dude, I just saw this excellent portal transportation, man. Anyway, you wanna hang out?”

“Sorry, man. Me and my boy, Spring are chilling out with our hoes, so no can do, bro.”

“Aight, I get ya.”

“Pimpin’ ain’t easy, man.”

Poison nodded in agreement. “Tru dat, man, tru dat.” 

In the next universe, he arrived on a street near Ivy’s house. Ivy appeared to be sitting behind a bush outside the house, which confused Gary for a moment until Ruby kicked open the door, wearing a black robe as she yelled, “I know you’re out there, stupid demon! Begone with you!”

“No way!” Ivy replied, getting to her feet. “I won’t rest until I beat you!

Ruby crossed her arms as she laughed. “Haaaaahahahaha! Fool! You believe you can beat me?”

“Yeah!”

Just then, Willard, Adol, Masterman, Omar and Hopper showed up, with Willard being ahead of them. “Allow us to handle this, Ivy. Its Morphin’ time, gentlemen.” One by one they went through typical transformation scenes, Masterman being the green ranger, Adol being the black ranger, Omar being blue and Hopper being yellow. Willard’s theme being Black Rose from Eternal Darkness, Masterman’s was Gangstas Paradise, Omar’s was ‘Crazy’, Adol’s was ‘I See Girls’, and Hopper’s was ‘Jump Around’.

Gary stroked his chin as he said, “This must be the bizarro universe, where good people are evil instead…did the Loli Rangers even have transformation themes? Well whatever, I still need to get back.” Gary jumped into a portal as the others charged at Ruby.

He arrived in a dark theatre, where the only people sitting there were Ivy, Poison and Ruby watching a movie. As he raised an eyebrow, Ivy suddenly started singing. “A scrap in tide, let’s get set for action!”

Poison immediately chipped in with, “To launch the ship, out of the sand!”

In unison, they then sang, “He tried to kill her with a forklift!” Ruby threw her hands up as she yelled, “Huzzah!” Gary quickly turned around and hopped back into the portal, moments before Ruby yelled, “Run, Forrest, run!”

“And watch out for snakes!” Poison added.

Gary arrived in the middle of a field where a war was taking place. The sky was dark blue and explosions were happening throughout the place. Damien quickly pulled Gary back as a bomb hit the ground. “Are you crazy, soldier?! Keep your eyes open!”

“Could I ask where I am?”

“You’re in a war zone, boy!”

“I realize that but-”

“Just get your ass out there and help us win this one. We’re up against our dreaded enemy, Lolita.” He took out binoculars and looked far across the field, as Lolita had just deployed several artillery cannons. Damien gave her the middle finger, and in response she waved, completely deadpan. “She’s a cunning one, I should know, I read her book.” He took out a red book titled, “How to be a Magnificent Bastard, by Lolita Reipa.”

“Uh-huh, well could I g-”

“Ivy!” Damien yelled.

“Yes commander?” She asked, running over.

He handed her a red shirt. “Give it to some cannon fodder to save casualties done to other soldiers.”

“Yes sir!” She handed the shirt to Ruby, who cheerfully accepted it and ran on ahead, resulting in her being shot at and blown up repeatedly. Gary jumped back into a portal when Damien wasn’t looking.

The next universe was surprisingly rather normal. He walked along the streets, thinking he had returned, but got strange looks from people who walked by and the cars which passed, with a group of girls whispering about him as he passed them. Eventually, a girl who looked like Cherry approached him and said, “Umm, I was wondering, are you really Gary from that show?”

“Show?”

“Yeah, something about an epic conquest. If you’re not him then you’re a really good cosplayer.”

“…You’re kidding, right?”

“Nope, its real. But I’ve always wondered a few things, where do you keep your weapons when you’re not using them? How old are you guys? And who’s your dad?”

“I’m not going to answer those.”

A little later, Gary reached the network studio room, where the creators who were two ninjas were discussing ideas. “Okay, I think we should introduce another character.”

“Don’t we have enough? Besides, I didn’t think I’d be saying this, but we need more sausage on the menu. And new ideas.”

“What about a spoof of the Friday the 13th movies?”

“You can’t go basing chapters on anything and making tons of pop culture references for the lulz, they need to have a point. Don’t be like Family Guy.”

“You always say that.”

“With good reason, plus maybe its just me but there seems to be some lolicon tones somewhere here.”

“You’re just exaggerating, how would you even know, you’ve never seen the visuals! Anyway, we should do a spinoff, perhaps one about Spring and Floyd.”

“Nah.”

“What about one with Ruby, to do with crime fighting?”

“I’m not feeling it. By the way, I checked out the figurines either, and the poses are quite questionable. Who exactly is the character supposed to be aimed at?”

“Uhh, well…”

Gary knocked just at the moment, entering the room as they turned their attention to him. “Hey there, from what I hear our universe doesn’t really exist, and we’re just fictional characters, written on a script by some loser.”

“I’m not a loser!” One ninja exclaimed.

“Anyway, how did this even come about.”

“I think it went something like this…”

---

In the same room, one ninja came to the other with an idea. “Okay, lets do a show, and it’ll be like this other show, but with crazy things like demons.”

“So its somewhat original, but its not?”

“Its not. The main character will be a villain protagonist.”

“I like where this is going.”

“Her rival would be the kind of girl to be a protagonist in a magical girl anime.”

“But this isn’t one.”

“It certainly isn’t one.” He shook his head.

“Lets green light this ****.” The second one said, slamming his hand on the table.

---

“And then it became history.” The ninja nodded.

“Uh-huh. Well I’m going now.” Gary opened up  the portal behind him. “And if that’s true, try to write my character a little better?” He quickly hopped in and vanished.

The final earth Gary arrived in appeared to be somewhat of a wasteland, the sky being dark red, the rubble combined with the damaged and broken vehicles cluttering the streets, and the various buildings and other locations on fire, Gary easily assumed the worst. After a little bit of walking around the empty streets, he pulled out the remote, when suddenly a ship in the sky fired at him, hitting him and knocking the remote out of his hands. The ship sounded an alarm, causing more to quickly reach that area as Gary ran, unable to find the remote. He leapt into a window and charged through numerous buildings, trying to outrun the searchlights. Eventually when he looked back and assumed he had lost them, he was suddenly punched out by an unknown individual, looking up he noticed it looked like a more mature Ivy before passing out.

He awoke in a stone cell, with a small window behind him and he was slightly restricted of moving too much as his limbs were chained to corners of the room. He heard Ivy yelling at some guards as he came to. “Put the non-believer in the seat of used tampons, make him play Superman 64, and then when his spirit finally breaks, make him watch Disaster Movie. And video tape the torture too, I love nothing more than the sounds of pain.” After some time, she opened Gary’s cell door and waved as a chair suddenly appeared behind her. She took a seat, crossing her left leg over her right. “Ahh, you’re awake, prince. It‘ll soon be time for the fun to begin. My guards will bring the whip.”

“Where the hell is this place?”

“This is Earth, silly. I own it now, I’ve owned it for over ten years. Everyone bows to me, or is made an example of. Look at the wall to your right.” He did so, seeing yellow stains in various spots. “I own this, I even marked my territory. I had to get two guards to hold me up so I could properly pee on the walls, but it was done. I’ve defiled almost all prisoners, because they’re all my territory.”

“You’re pretty damn **** up.”

“Oh please, you’re too kind.” She said with a smile.

Just then, a truck was thrown through the cell wall, hitting Ivy as it went through another wall. Ruby jumped through the hole, also looking a lot older, but keeping the same hairstyle and wearing a blue bodysuit. She cut the chains and threw him his sword. Though he had many questions, he decided to run before Ivy recovered.

As they ran down a hallway, slashing through the guards, Gary then said, “Could I ask what’s going on? This is the future?”

“I guess you could say that. Remember that time when the war was going on? You could think of this as a bad end, where I gave into my inner hatred and joined Ivy instead. We were surprisingly able to do a lot, working together. She was somehow able to gain special abilities from the people she killed, so she’s too dangerous to fight right now.”

“Ahh, so-” Ruby quickly leaped out a window to her right, but before Gary could do so, Ivy appeared down the hallway, summoning rock hands which tried to crush Gary. He ran, eventually reaching an elevator, and as the doors were closing, Ivy stopped it by trying to grab him. He shocked her hand, sending her flying back and finally closing the door.

As he reached outside, Ivy leaped down, shaking the ground just before kicking him across the street. Geysers of fire erupted from underground as she ominously advanced upon him, saying, “Don’t die too fast. Make this fun for me, boy.” He got up, gripping his sword as Ivy charged at him. He sidestepped her punch and slashed at her several times then kicked her. He leapt towards her again and tried to impale her from above, but she rolled out the way and hit him with several lightning fast punches to the gut, then blasting him away with a ball of concentrated air. As he was getting up, she charged herself with lightning and tackled him though a building, then proceeding to drag him along the rocky ground as she laughed, finally lifting him up and kicking him through another building.

He coughed up blood as he struggled to get up, and was suddenly surprised when he saw the remote thrown to him and noticed Ruby from an alleyway nearby. He took it and nodded, taking off as Ivy quickly showed up, firing beams of fire. He got it working and leaped into the portal, which closed before Ivy could reach him. She angrily kicked a car out of frustration. “I’ll get you next time, prince, next time…”

Eventually, Gary managed to return to his own dimension as it was still late at night, and quickly went to see Ruby. Ivy, Poison, Ruby and Crystal appeared to be in her bedroom. “There you are! I just had to spend ages getting back here after being sent to another dimension!”

“So that’s what I forgot!” She replied.

“Did it hurt travelling to other dimensions?” Poison asked.

“Its occasionally prone to give you a headache, but the gaps between dimensions tend to have Guile’s theme in the background, so its not so bad. Anyway, I’ve seen tons of crazy and bizarre things during that time, some which I never wanna see again. On the plus side, I’ve learned something today.”

“Treat others how you’d like to be treated?” Crystal guessed.

“No, its that regardless of how crazy this place might be, there’s a lot worse things out there.”

“You want a hug?” Poison asked.

“No, I’m not like that, damnit!” Gary walked off, yelling random obscenities.

After a few moments of silence, Ruby then said, “He always was the weirdest one of us.”

“Indeed.” Ivy nodded.

“Totally.” Poison said, also nodding.
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