It was a bright and sunny morning, and I happened to acquire some excess money. While that money may bring a feeling of joy, I felt anxiety. The feeling that I had been avoiding something for some time now. Like a piece in a jigsaw puzzle which got lost under the bed. But the bed hadn't been cleaned in over half a decade, and I was unsure of its depths. But this time is different, I've got my rubber gloves. There I was one day, laying on my couch, watching some crap on my laptop & being a useless piece of sh
it all day when the phone suddenly rang. So I said, "Hello? Who is this?" The voice on the other end was barely audible at first, then after a short period of silence it whispered, "
Dark Souls..."
I burned the phone, for it had been corrupted by the devil and his heathens, but these blasphemous words showed themselves everywhere: The television, in the sky, randomly inserted during random conversations with friends. The beast would taunt me till the end of my days, saying, "Come at me." and I would turn my back on it with such excuses that, "It looks pretty boring,", "It seems vindictive & kinda cheap," and the well-known, "Eh, it's not my kind of game." but no longer. I journeyed to its sacred dungeon and entered its lair to meet this sinful beast where it had waited all this time, expecting my arrival. It said once more, "Come at me." and with controller at the ready, I came. The game arrived like a flash, I torn off that plastic & sparks flew. I popped open that concealed case and the light hit me, fierce enough to melt a volcano, but this had no effect on me because it may be a beast but I'm also a beast. I slam that s
hit into my PS3, with the force of a thousand suns and boot it up. My anus is ready, I'm prepared to die.
Thought it would be more amusing to talk like this when I play through it