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Something I found in Documents Folder...

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the poncho
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Liberty or Death


« on: 04 October, 2007, 03:49:16 pm »

Count Kain Udenshire of Udenshire knew this would be a very pleasant day. Udenshire being a strange village on the border of the Hyrulean Ordana Province rarely got any slice of the cake when it came to kingdom-to-kingdom negotiations. But this year would be different, for the Count had sent several of his men into the Faron Province, just north of Ordana. He had heard legend of a powerful sword nestled in the sacred forests of the province. He had gotten word that the soldiers found the sword, but none of them could pull it out of the stone it was embedded in.

“Fools,” Lord Udenshire said to himself looking in the mirror in the midsummer night. “I dream of the day I’ll get a respectable soldier around here! Even if that soldier has the head of a horse!” the Count chuckled to himself. He decided he’d travel to the blade’s home, relieve the stone of its sword-holding duties, and take it to Hyrule Castle to be traded for riches and power. The whole journey would take about an hour, the Count reasoned. No way he’d miss the negotiations. No way in twilight, he reasoned.

Upon arriving at the blade’s home, the Count got a chance to take in the beauty of the grove he was in. The willow trees drooped low across the temple that lacked a ceiling he was standing in. Wet with dew, the trees seemed to be like orchards of diamonds, each droplet of water a priceless gem. Grasshoppers hopped around the sacred place, and the scene reminded him of a children’s tale.

But enough poetry for now, Kain Udenshire thought. I’m determined to get a cut this year in the negotiations. His right hand man waddled up to him.

Wallace Grimm was a portly man, but one of the strongest soldiers Udenshire had ever or would ever see (and that wasn’t saying much). For a man of his size, he was rather swift, able to outrun an angry goat any day.

“Oi, sir, the rock likes the sword to much. Won’t stop hugging it.”

Wallace Grimm was also the dumbest soldier Udenshire had ever or would ever see.

“Well if you put it that way, I’m certain it would let go with a little persuasion.”

“Oh! You going to give it biscuits?”

Kain Udenshire of Udenshire stared at the man with a look of despair. “No, I am not going to give it biscuits. You however, are going to crush it to smithereens!”

“An’ how am I going to go about that, mi’lord?”

“I don’t know, use your head!” Kain Udenshire of Udenshire pondered this statement for a moment. “Nevermind, I’ll do the thinking. Now then, what can crush a rock, no questions asked… The hardest substance known to man...”

“Churches, mi’lord! Churches!”

Kain Udenshire of Udenshire ignored his bumbling compatriot. Looking towards the sky for influence, he thought. Then, noticing the trees, he remembered his clever analogy.

“We need a diamonds... Large, heavy diamonds..."
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